Loves Tragic hate Story..... @evilninja92 - Tumblr Blog

Another year.

As my birthday nears, I can’t help but to think about what that means, celebrating my birth 36 years ago. I’ve done a lot in my life, seen more and done more then most, given my all to every thing, loved completely and truthfully. Yet I’m alone, my life though special to me 365 days of the year, is only special to others 1 of those days. Thier are more masks on my birthday then on Halloween. I just want to be special to one person a little every day vs really special to every one for one day.

It causes me to selfreflect, to consider other posibilities. I have regrets, anger, resentment,...demons. Maybe my life is not special to me. Twelve years ago I attempted suicide, and in reflection of that decided that it was a waist, that my life was worth more. Ten years ago filled with self doubt, addicted to drugs and with no direction I joined the Army as an M1 Armor crewmen and was assigned to a heavy combat unit 3d ACR. I did this knowing id deploy, willing to give my life... no wanting to give my life to a cause other then my own, to do something selfless for once.

I got clean, got out of debt, survived war, and lived. Though I lived, i dont think I live, I just continue to survive. Ive lost alot of friends along the way, most not to war but to the demons they bring back with them. Strong men, better men, men that had something to live for, men that i looked up to, mentors. I survive.

I dont feel like my birth, my life, or the fact that i mearly survive is worth celebrating. As a child i use to look forward to my birthday with such enthusiasm, as an adult I have that same enthusiasm for the day i finally die, but untill then, ill survive.

twentiethcenturykid-deactivated

DUNGEON CRAWL

FOUND IN A DIME STORE IN THE FORGOTTON REALMS

Larami Advanced Dungeons And Dragons Wallet

Perfect for that spare gold you always like to carry just in case!

The best dog and the best damn thing I ever did was rescue you, I thought I was saving you but you have repaid me a 1000 times over and continue too every day. I love you Hero (at Anne Arundel County, Maryland)