bearer of the curse @exitw0und - Tumblr Blog

mournfulroses

Albert Camus, from a notebook entry featured in Notebooks of Albert Camus, 1935-1942

violentwavesofemotion-deactivat

“I have / my ways of getting through.”

— Margaret Atwood, from The Collected Poems; “A Bus Along St. Clair; December,”

petaltexturedskies

But I do feel strange—almost unearthly. I’ll never get used to being alive. It's a mystery. Always startled to find I've survived.

John Steinbeck, Journal of a Novel: The East of Eden Letters

geryone

Reading Love of The Wolf by Hélène Cixous & feeling insane

feignedremote

Common Frank Bidart banger (from "In the Ruins," in Half-Light: Collected Poems 1965-2016)

metamorphesque

spring 2023: still life

mitski (pink in the night), kathy beekman, nayirrah waheed, alejandra pizarnik, kim cogan, emily palermo, felix vallotton, tatheve, sylvia plath, leonardo cremonini, nicole krauss, anaïs nin, c. michael dudash, mitski (last words of a shooting star)

buy me a coffee

metamorphesque

i'm all the people i've ever loved

loseness lines over time by olivia de recat, @i-wrotethisforme, Kaveh Akbar, Olivie Blake

maybuds

from Loneliness: coping with the gap where friends used to be by Olivia Laing for The Guardian

[Text ID: Last night, I ate dinner with my friend Jenny. In real life, on a warm London evening, forking up aubergine from the same plate. We laughed, shared family news, told each other the things we’d been worrying over. At home, alone in my study, they’d felt insurmountable, a sign that something was irredeemably wrong with me. Under the gentle scrutiny of my friend, they diminished to a normal size: just the grit of everyday traffic with other humans. I walked home feeling buoyant, nearly invincible. I need my friends. I bet you need yours.]

intactics-deactivated20250505

becoming a monk and marrying God due to tragic and unrealistic desire for a 24/7 sadomasochistic relationship with a morally flawless top

intactics-deactivated20250505

@theoreticallysensible yesssssssssssss

HOLY SONNET XIV

but also, consider the following:

&

salemwitchtrials-deactivated202

“I wanted to be a rain salesman, carrying my satchel full of rain from door to door, selling thunder, selling the way air feels after a downpour, but there are no openings in the rain department, and so they left me dying behind this desk—adding bleeps, subtracting chunks—and I would give a bowl of wild blossoms, some rain, and two shakes of my fist at the sky to be living.”

— Sinners Welcome; Elegy for a Rain Salesman, Mary Karr

sicknessinmotion

OUR LOVE IS AN OPEN WOUND

sierra demulder // haruki murakami // nikolay tolmachev // hieu minh nguyen // sierra demulder // osamu dazai.

petrichor-moss-and-lightning

on reckless, self-destructive devotion and the sharp edges of longing that look almost like teeth

Phoebe Bridgers, “Moon Song” // unknown // Margaret Atwood, “Speeches for Dr. Frankenstein” // quadruple dog art by @mxmorggo on Instagram // Hozier, “Take Me to Church” // STELLAR, “Reflections” // AJJ, “I Wanna Be Your Dog 2” // Mitski, “I’m Your Man” // William Shakespeare, Midsummer’s Night Dream // Tumblr user @ojibwa // Trista Mateer, from “How I Asked You to Stay,” Honeybee.

aworsening

wild geese - mary oliver / @canis-infernalis-art / crime and punishment - fyodor dostoevsky / can't help myself - sun yuan and peng yu / drunk drivers/killer whales - car seat headrest

mongreldyke

feral dogs and the fear of being chained

untitled - mischievous.dog // c-53 post // on the topic of growing up - fruiteas // how to be a dog - andrew kane // never tamed - fuckyoubaker // phantom synapsis - mothsprout // episode 15 - mabel podcast // playing devil's advocate - babezord // tongues and teeth - the crane wives // the choleric (the wolf) - beth cavener // more and more - margaret atwood