Magic and Misfits a collection of my favourite sentences from the first three episodes of Dimension20′s Magic and Misfits. Part 1/??? feel free to change gender specific words, pronouns, whatever you like to make it fit your muse better!
❝ I want [School Name] on three, Family on six. One, two, three- ❞
❝ Oh, who are you to judge me? You think you’re better than me, bird? ❞
❝ Do you think that pigeons got preferences around food? Do you think there are some pigeons that are like, “I like Cheetos,” and then there are other pigeons who are like, “I like Fritos,” and then the other pigeons are like, “I don’t fuck with Doritos”? ❞
❝ Fuck you guys. I always knew magic was real! ❞
❝ This is weird shit. But hey, private school is crazy, all right? They got juice and shit in the fountains, so I think that’s the thing. ❞
❝ No, Mother, I did not rent an owl on the internet! There are strict handling laws in Seattle. ❞
❝ I’m very proud of you. Artistic expression is so important. It’s like all your piercings and the tattoos that you’ve got. ❞
❝ Clearly I’m different and cool and so much darker than my peers. I deserve this. ❞
❝ Look, I did okay in school, I went along with all the normals and everything for as long as it was convenient, but this is a great opportunity for me!❞
❝ My entire life I have felt just very different from everybody else. I’m very, very different, and that sets me apart and makes me unique and very creative. ❞
❝ If they make me forget you, you have to kill them all with your magic! ❞
❝ Don’t worry, I’ll do a ton of magic killing. ❞
❝ Oh, so you’re like a raven bringing good tidings and news? ❞
❝ I don’t believe or trust you. You constantly say, ‘It’s for the cont,’ and I don’t know what that means. ❞
❝ Woo, D’s make degrees!❞
❝ No, I wouldn’t have enrolled you in a school that involves a flying rat as a delivery mechanism ‘cause we have email. ❞
❝ Oh, boy. Are you gonna be weird, or will you be normal? ❞
❝ Don’t bow. Don’t do that, that’s so weird. Please don’t do that. ❞
❝ You don’t have to stay, you can go. I know that I’m bad. I know I’m bad to be around. You can go if this is not good for you. ❞
❝ Did it fly here from England? It’s hundreds of days, that’s- Where does it rest on the ocean? It can’t lock its wings like an albatross and sleep on the wind. ❞
❝ That doesn’t sound cool, that sounds wizardy. ❞
❝ I thought you were gonna straight up die. I thought you were gonna get murdered by a bird. ❞
❝ Owls don’t ring in the wild. I don’t wanna be Mr. Bird Facts all the time, but owls don’t ring naturally. ❞
❝ Oh, that’s just a piece… Mm, no it’s fine. Good for you. I’m very proud of you, and I’m sure your rocks are very magical.
❞
❝ I’m having the best time I’ve ever had in my life. I’m not sad right now. ❞
❝ My latent abilities as a witch are probably just late in blooming because the flower that blooms in adversity is often the most complex and dark of them all. ❞
❝ I don’t have a screen on my phone. I only have like, three numbers saved in there. It’s 911, poison control, and animal control. ❞
❝ My self-esteem isn’t really tied up in my knowledge of this strange new place that I just found out existed, so. I’m good. ❞
❝ Scuppers? Is that the sport? That’s some, oh, man, that don’t sound cool at all. Saying I’m a scuppers player does not sound like it’s gonna be cool. ❞
❝ Okay, all right. I can integrate this into my world view and still be fine. All right. ❞
❝ Is it because anything that you nurture and care for dies a horrible death? ❞
❝ They don’t all die! Sometimes they do stuff, or they tell me to do stuff. Sometimes they don’t turn out to be animals. One time a pig’s head in the butcher shop told me that God and the devil killed each other. So you know, I don’t know if that’s an animal or not. I don’t know if that’s an animal or not, and it’s been happening for a long time! ❞
❝ I don’t know you, so why are you conspiring with me? ❞
❝ Just general whimsy feels to be hittin’ here. ❞
❝ That is going to do numbers on the 'Gram. ❞
❝ It’s dark, I’m dark. I’m so spooky. ❞
❝ You guys don’t have to hang out with me if you don’t wanna. I know it sucks to be around me. You just saw a bunch of animals vomit blood. I know that sucks. You don’t have to hang around me if you don’t want. ❞
❝ Real people aren’t tropes, though, you know? I’m not a character. ❞
❝ You clearly belong here and should be here and should be learning magic. I’m basically just here to get this, just cut out of me, and just be able to have a life, you know? ❞
❝ I am not an evil wizard! ❞