bitch, i'm fabulous

[fabulousbitchfabi]

vincentmlee​:

The look on Vincent’s face as FaBi continued her story could only be described as horrified.  “Please tell me that you are joking.  I cannot…"  Vincent knocked back the rest of his drink to try to wipe the mental image she had constructed from his mind.  “I’m willing to try a lot of different things but that’s, just no."  Chuckling softly, he slid his glass to her.  "That ability of yours definitely comes in handy in a place like this.”

“I fucking wish I could tell you that.  There’s not enough booze in the world to erase that memory.  Trust me when I tell you that I have tried, multiple times, to black out hard enough to wipe it from my brain.”  As if to prove her point, she knocked back another shot before refilling Vincent’s glass with a couple of finger waggles.  Wholly unnecessary to utilize her abilities, but she did like doing most things with a bit of flair.  “And yet the mooing remains.  That it does, friend, and especially handy when it comes to lining my pockets.  Any fancy abilities beneath that pretty face of yours?”

[fabulousbitchfabi]

mari-zeriah​:

@fabulousbitchfabi​

After waking up next to a beautiful woman, Mari had a brief but heated debate with herself. Wake her or let her sleep. She looked around the room that she assumed was Fabi’s until she caught the calendar out of the corner of her eye. The year was wrong. There were various ways that this could have happened. A powerful meta meddling with timelines, CARMA screwing with shit, or Mari just lost more memories. She finally decided that most people would need some time to orient themselves to the weirdness that happens in Pansaw so she extracted her arm from under Fabi gently and started learning about her new life…again. 

The apartment they were in was massive. Seemed like a penthouse or loft of some kind. It was very elegantly decorated. After perusing the shelves and closets, it seemed that they both lived here. Or at least spent a lot of time here together. There were two distinct sides of the closet. One was clearly hers though a few more feminine elements than she was used to. Being short, she had always preferred high heels that she could remember. But leather jackets and pants or cut off shorts were more the norm for her. The other side was very high fashion. A wide array of colors and fabrics and an entire section of shoe shelves going up to the high ceiling. It seemed that one or both of them were doing very well for themselves.

It seemed that no matter where she was, Mari always had the habit of sitting on the kitchen counters to drink her coffee. She was doing just that, and scrolling through her phone to catch herself up, when a very confused looking Fabi walked in. 

“Morning Sunshine, sleep well?” 

Originally posted by quellstak

Waking up alone in a strange bed was hardly an unfamiliar occurrence for the Meta, which meant that initially she simply laid in bed and tried to shake off the sleep that threatened to cling and pull her back under.  The sheets were definitely an expensive high thread count, a self-satisfied hum leaving her throat as her palms skated over the material.  Whoever she had gone home with, apparently she’d done very well for herself.  It was only when she reached for her phone that it occurred to her something else was at play.

Twitter was blowing up, but not about the usual shit.  As if that wasn’t strange enough, there were frantic text messages that had her jolting out of bed.  And seeing the picture on the nightstand - a grinning Mari clearly holding the camera as FaBi nuzzled her cheek, hair windblown and eyes closed.

What the actual fuck.  But at the very least -  

Mari.  Mari she knew, a solid ground to grasp onto when everything else seemed to be tilting away from the reality she knew.  A quick exploration of the space revealed an office, guest bedroom - and what was clearly an in-home fashion studio, with her taste perfectly represented.  Only then did she stumble into the kitchen, to Mari seemingly calmly drinking coffee at the counter.

“Care to explain what the fuck is happening here, Trouble?  Because you don’t sound nearly as clueless as I am, and way too fucking chipper for -” she squinted at the kitchen clock.  “Nine in the fucking morning.”  The scent of coffee wafted her way, a lowly ‘thank fucking God’ muttered under her breath as she all but lurched towards the pot.  Morning person, thy name was not FaBi.  “Because the fucking monkey wasn’t enough, how are they fucking with us today?”

[fabulousbitchfabi]

urielzeriah​:

A smile tugged at the corner of his lips at her snort, telling him a good bit about the woman.  Of course he’d already heard a good bit from Mari, but he always preferred to form his own opinions, especially when it came to filling a council seat.  “You make a fair point, though I would argue there is a much better currency that makes the world go ‘round.  Money is simply a symbol of it."  That smile on his face turned a little wicked as he looked at FaBi, his eyes flashing briefly red.  “I’m talking about power, real power.  When you have power, everything else falls into place.”

“Unless you’re talking about the Anna Wintour or Miranda Priestley kind of power, I don’t see how that funds my expensive fashion habits,” the Meta mulled, curious about the flash of red in his eyes but rolling with it all the same.  Not exactly something one encountered on a daily basis.  “What, daddy, you going to make me the next editor of Vogue?  Get me seats for Fashion Week?”

[fabulousbitchfabi]

After graduating from Pansaw University with her fashion degree, FaBi immediately submitted an application to appear on Project Runway season 55.  While she failed to win the show, her personality and creations shown at Fashion Week were enough to make a name for herself nationally.  She launched her own brand, ‘fan-effing-fabulous’ and has found moderate success in a cut throat industry.

It has been years since FaBi has been behind a bar, but she has deals in place with multiple locations within Pansaw to fill their liquor requirements and her wallet.  Between the brand and her deals, there is little left for her to wont for.

She is still a dedicated member of the Nephilim, though when the council lost so many members, she switched her mantle from Sloth to Pride.  FaBi thought the sin much more appropriate to her personality.

It was something of a shock to fall head over heels for one Mari Zeriah considering the Meta’s aversion to feelings, but fall she did.  Exclusivity might have been difficult for them to figure out at first, but everything seems to be smooth sailing now.  When they can, they take their business trips together - both legitimate and not and share a lavish apartment in Wolfhurst.

[fabulousbitchfabi]

[fabulousbitchfabi]

[fabulousbitchfabi]

vincentmlee​:

“Oh trust me, I wish for the same thing.  I wouldn’t have to spend all my time trying to improve other people’s wardrobe.  It starts to cut into my day job."  Vincent laughed and winked at FaBi, pulling a deep drink from his glass.  "Oh I do have some limits.  No animals or children for me, unless we’re talking about adults playing roles and then we can talk.”

“Oh sure, we can talk about that.  But there are some animals that I just draw the line on.  I had a girl who had thing for cows.  It was cute when it was collectable porcelain, not so much when she strapped on udders and begged me to milk her as she mooed.”  FaBi shuddered at the memory, using her abilities to fill up a shot for herself to toss back in an effort to erase that mental image.  “They say you shouldn’t kink shame and all but fuck that, I will absolutely judge you based on what gets your gears grinding.”

[fabulousbitchfabi]

urielzeriah​:

Uriel laughed at the woman’s comment, a grin stretching across his face.  She would definitely fit in with the rest of his group, her attitude of superiority one that he could use.  He watched as the alcohol flowed into his glass and smirked, red tendrils of Aether reaching out from his fingers to loop around the glass and pull it toward him.  “Fascinating,” he replied as he sipped the rum, letting out a satisfied sigh.  “That is just what the doctor ordered.  And far be it from me to disappoint a lovely lady like yourself."  Slipping the button on his jacket free, Uriel leaned back from the bar.  "Tell me dear, you are obviously suited to much better things than serving alcohol in a bar to people who don’t appreciate you.  Why are you here?”

A little snort of amusement left her at being called a ‘lovely lady’ simply because it was the polar opposite of the words that were usually slung her way.  One brow did rise as she watched the tendrils pull the glass closer to him, but rather than asking, she continued on her favorite subject to talk about - herself.  “Haven’t you heard, daddy?  Cold hard cash makes the world go ‘round.  Unless you want to fund my little couture habit, somebody’s gotta pay the bills.  And I refuse to be just another broke college student.”  Her nose actually wrinkled at the idea.

[fabulousbitchfabi]

owenxjackson​:

“I’m not?” Jackson says raising a brow, arms moving to cross but the woman was quicker, and Jackson found himself being dragged along with her. Had he been more sober, maybe he would have resisted, but FaBi was hot, and well, Jackson found that hard to resist. He staggered along behind her, his own stride a little unsteady, but he huffed out a laugh as they found who FaBi was looking for. 

His eyes perk up when she mentions getting drunk, and any hesitation he had from being pulled away from his smoke break were gone. Jackson couldn’t help but smirk as the woman seemed out the other man, impressed, and very glad he wasn’t the one on the receiving end of it. 

“Damn, $100 bucks and drinks for a week? Make it two and I’ll do it myself.” Jackson says with a cocky smile, not really thinking about the job he was just volunteering himself for. 

The only reason FaBi had stopped bitching at Antonio was because she needed to take a breath.  There was more ranting and reaming to be done.  Her mouth opened to continue the diatribe when her unexpected companion volunteered, shock written across her features.  “You will?  Are you that dumb and desperate?  Or maybe it’s an unfulfilled disgusting kink, like sounding.”

She didn’t even have to think about it to agree - anything to keep from dealing with it herself.  “Done.  I’ll show you to the cleaning supplies and your two weeks start tonight - but only, and I mean only if you don’t come back smelling like shit.  I don’t serve stank.”  Focus turned back to Antonio as she shook her head in disbelief.  Who the fuck volunteered to clean someone else’s shitty ass bathroom?  “And you.  Turn your fucking ears on, you prick.  I could have been mid-assault and screaming for you.”  Not that she precisely needed security’s assistance often, but why defend yourself when someone else could do it for you?

Huffing, she relaxed her grip on the stranger’s arm and started to lead the way to the cleaning supplies.  “I do not get enough of a cut to deal with this literal shit, I tell you.  What’s your name, seeing as I’m sure we’ll be seeing a lot of each other over the next two weeks?”

[fabulousbitchfabi]

mari-zeriah​:

After waking up with her powers all but gone, all Mari wanted was to find FaBi and drink away the pain. She walked in to the bar where she worked and stopped cold at the animal slinging drinks behind the bar. Then it spoke. Mari’s jaw dropped and she stood frozen to the spot for several moments after what seemed to be her friend stopped speaking. 

“F-Fabi?” She walked quickly forward and reached over the bar to lay her hands on either side of the animal’s face. It took less than a second of looking at her for Mari to confirm for herself who it was behind those eyes. She offered a small smile that she hoped was supportive, “Actually I think you’re adorable. If it makes you feel any better, shit like this happens here all the time and it’s almost always temporary. I still think you’re perfect.”

Originally posted by official-roti

“Un-fucking-fortunately, yes,” she sighed, quickly catching her reflection in the mirrored back of the bar and flinching away from it.  Instead, she scoffed at Mari’s compliment and almost visibly gagged.  “This is the furthest from adorable I have ever been.  And that includes after staying up 36 hours in Vegas after trying cocaine and doing the walk of shame the next night when I finally awoke from my mini-coma.”  FaBi whined at the thought that this happened ‘all the time,’ dramatically collapsing her face and hands on the bar top.  “Wait.”  She perked, little monkey brow furrowing at Mari.  “What the fuck do you mean by almost always temporary?  Are you telling me there’s a chance I can never wear my regular clothes again?  Or my Jimmy Choos?”

[fabulousbitchfabi]

xastcriiax​:

Seth snorted out a laugh as this woman laid on the charm and compliments. It wasn’t the first time he’d experienced it; he’d gotten a few hits from most of the female and few of the male patrons who came to Knight Life. It still didn’t make the introverted Meta entirely used to it though, especially when the flirter seemed to be so out of his league. “Do I really seem that innocent looking?” he asked, raising his brows as he handed Fabi her Bloody Mary. The bar was quiet enough for him to hang around this one customer. “I can say I’ve never had someone call me Bambi before,” he commented, sounding somewhat amused. “My story isn’t that interesting. I moved here from Chicago a few years back. Had a few… odd jobs before becoming a bartender. And now I’m here.” He held up his hands with a crooked grin. “What about you? What’s your story?”

“That you do.  All bright eyed and bushy tailed, don’t go wandering in the forest alone.  You just might not want to bring mom along for the trip,” she offered with one raised brow, pulling the Bloody Mary her way and immediately popping an olive into her mouth as he spoke.  “Odd jobs, you say?  Sounds like there’s more to them than just strangeness.  Don’t hold out on me now, Bambi.”  FaBi mulled as she chewed, taking a sip of her drink and deeming it acceptable.  “My story?”  She leaned her elbow on the bar, chin resting atop her fist as she spewed the usual ‘lying through her teeth’ response to her upbringing.  “Moved to LA to be a fashion model, found out that you have to be tall.  So I did the next best thing, and now I study fashion at good ole’ Pansaw U.  Go local sports team!”

[fabulousbitchfabi]

alessio-is-more​:

He looked at her suspiciously when he heard the mischievous tone in her reply. He kept a wary eye on her and suppressed yet another sigh. She was most likely a meta and there was nothing he could do about it but stew in his repressed rage against the people who thought them superior to his own meagre human abilities. After all, e had to blame someone for the eradication of his whole family. Right after everything had settled down for us, as well he though bitterly to himself.  he raised a brow as if in challenge as he watched her pour from one of the expensive bottles and readied his credit card for the ridiculous amount of money that this niht would cost him. Nothing like drowning in debt because of your drinking habits, he smirked to himself “ Are you perhaps always this perky…?” he trailed off as he definitely took a moment to appraise the good-looking woman who pushed his drink toward him. 

He wondered why she was looking quite smug as he picked up the drinking and took a hesitant sip from the glass. Perhaps he should be careful what he asked for as the strong amber liquid hit the back of his throat, causing him to cough slightly. “This is a gif? Then I must thank you.” he replied, still smirking back at her. 3 fingers of the strongest as his first drink was only a starter. She’d have to do much better than that. 

One brow rose at his question before she burst out into harsh laughter.  Perky?  Her?  Her noon classes were lucky she ever made it in on time seeing as the bars closed as late as they did and she always needed to do something to wind down after work. Or someone, she wasn’t that picky.  “You are the first person in my entire adult life to ever call me perky.  Do I look like a mother fuckin’ cheerleader to you, Stallion?”

Another bout of laughter ensued as he coughed, though it was less harsh and much more amused.  FaBi touched the side of the glass to reduce the alcohol content to a more tolerable level, but kept it at 130.  A little extra kick, not enough to have him die of alcohol poisoning in the bar.  Not only was it bad for business, but then she’d have to call people, probably fill out forms, and it just wasn’t worth the hassle.

“You can thank me with a giant tip.  Or if you stick around until closing, maybe we can play ‘just the tip,’” she replied with a smirk, refilling the expensive bottle she’d originally lifted the alcohol from with a little wiggle of her fingers.

[fabulousbitchfabi]

noah-wright​:

In terms of weird shit he’d been through, waking up from a nap in the body of a pigeon ranked pretty high. Up at the top, even, but here was the thing–he didn’t completely mind? Sure, if he’d been given his pick of animals to spend the day as, he probably would have picked something cooler–a tiger, or a big dog, maybe a snake, and in terms of birds, really he was more of a magpie, what with the trinkets, and the sparkles, but–there was nothing wrong with pigeons. People were always on about flying rats, but they were adaptable, is what they were, and sort of pretty, and they did blend in, which was sort of his thing, so…

Anyway, the point was, once he’d got over the initial shock, it wasn’t so bad. He could see better, for one thing, and he could fly, albeit clumsily–he’d wrecked his bedroom crashing into things before he managed to get out the open window and then, well–it wasn’t just Noah going through some weird shit. It was the whole city. 

Which was why, he supposed, when he hopped into a bar behind a patron with thumbs, he was not immediately shooed out. He hadn’t come in with any purpose. ‘It seemed funny at the time’ was as good a reason to do something as any, as far as Noah was concerned, and it seemed even funnier when he spotted, with his new pigeon-vision, a monkey working the bar.

“Talking pigeon walks into a bar,” he said to himself, clumsily taking off and alighting once more, this time on top of the bartending monkey’s head. “Barkeep, a thimble of your finest–can pigeons drink alcohol? If I drink, will I die? Make it Wild Turkey then, at least if I go out, it’ll be funny. You know. Cause birds.”

@fabulousbitchfabi

FaBi was unimpressed.  Even after being reassured the change would likely only be temporary, she was fuming mad that she’d been forced into public at all.  If it weren’t for the potential loss of the income that paid for both her schooling and her lifestyle, she would have hidden away in her apartment and drank the days away until she was back to her fabulous self.  Once all this fuckery was over and done with, she made a note to renegotiate her deal with the owner.  The way she saw it, forced humiliation deserved financial compensation.  Otherwise she’d take her abilities elsewhere. So she wasn’t in the best of moods already.

Then a fucking pigeon decided to land on her head.

“You ain’t getting dick until you get off of my bald fucking head,” she growled, one lumbering swipe attempted to get the damn talking bird off of her.  Fucking Pansaw.  This shit never happened in Idaho.  It was almost enough to make her miss home.  Almost.  “I already look hideous, am being forced to be in public looking like this.  I’m not adding bird shit on top of that list of ‘shit that’s fucked up’ and ‘why I’m fucking pissed.’“

[fabulousbitchfabi]

xastcriiax​:

Round One || Finn & FaBi

Finn was absolutely psyched to join the tournament this year. He loved having an excuse to fight people and ten grand was a lot of money he could use. Given his years of experience from C.A.R.M.A and being a vigilante, he felt pretty confident he could win with his skills. 

He didn’t know what his opponent, FaBi Anderson, was capable of, but he wasn’t too worried. He had a strong feeling he could handle it. His mind was more preoccupied on thinking what kind of name was FaBi as he waited on the platform to be lifted into the ring. Was it short for Fabian? Fabio? His odd thoughts were distracted as the platform began rising with a mechanical sound, his adrenaline already pumping in anticipation. Finn arrived on stage at the same time as this FaBi and quickly looked over with a smirk. She seemed pretty harmless, though he knew firsthand not to judge a book by its cover. 

“Hope you’re not planning on going easy here,” he called out to her, rolling his neck and shoulders. “Cause I’m definitely not.” 

@fabulousbitchfabi

There was one reason and one reason only that FaBi had decided to enter the tournament - money.  She wouldn’t have even entertained the idea had she not known that the Madhouse employed amazing healers.  Otherwise she would have weighed the potential harm to her face versus the prize money.

The Meta drank from the flask strapped to her thigh, purposefully leaving the cap off as she began to prepare for the fight.  While typically she liked to have others fight her battles for her, she wasn’t a stranger to using her abilities when needed.  And FaBi knew that she was far more dangerous with a little booze in her than without, especially if it came down to hand to hand combat.  Her own flapped as she jumped up and down a few times to try to reduce pre-fight jitters, head stretching from side to side as the platform began to rise.

Finn wasn’t exactly physically impressive.  And while she usually had no issues with judging books by their covers, when it came down to this, she knew better.  A snort came out at his words, eyes rolling.  “Are you fucking insane?  There’s an Oscar de la Renta coat calling my name, and nothing gets between me and my couture.”

The bell sounded and FaBi immediately went to work, lifting and multiplying the alcohol out of her flask until it surrounded her, the density almost solidifying into a shield.  She had a loose strategy for the fight, but beginning with a defensive move felt like the smart call.

[fabulousbitchfabi]

Hell Bound

“Are you trying to pretend like I’m ugly?”

[fabulousbitchfabi]

It was a damn good thing that FaBi could recall Ralph Lauren had a line of dog coats because it was the only thing that made her even remotely okay with being in public looking like this.  Because when she’d tried explaining to the bar owner that some kind of utter fuckery was going on, he’d still demanded she come in and work her magic no matter what she looked like, or else their deal would be done.  And as ugly as she felt, cold hard cash was still the way to her small, cold heart.  Seeing Mari walk into her bar should have perked her up, but it only settled dark depression even further on her furry shoulders.

“Don’t look at me, I’m hideous,” she whined, resisting the urge to literally throw the shot she’d just filled at the customer next to Mari.  “But if you could be so kind as to grab a pen and paper, I need to make a last will and testament for my closet in case this is permanent.”

@mari-zeriah​

[fabulousbitchfabi]

Spirit Animal: Bald Uakari

“I don’t know who the fuck you are, but I fucking hate you.”