shrimp

im so full of bug soup it's not even funny man, im also the US ambassador to the UN but shhh that's a secret | (they/he) | 18+ | side blogs: fatherplssaveme (witchy shit), serendipitous-soups (recipe collection blog), lockedbluetomb (nsfw blog)

[fakemarried]

pinned post pinned post pinned post !!!!!

name: soup/shrimp

pronouns: he/him, they/them

age: 18+ (if it really matters to u i can tell u my birthday but u have to get me a gift)

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likes: hannibal, sherlock, genshit impact, witchcraft, paganism, volleyball, painting, vocaloid, scavenging, diy, fandom/internet history, ffxv, world politics, cooking/baking, mcr, dnp, fob, general emo and scene culture, creepypasta, crochet, stardew valley, the colour green

dislikes: helluva boss, hazbin hotel, bugs, anthropoids, grapefruit, lord of the rings, brenden urie, many other things, the colour purple

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dni: under 16, nsfw blogs (yes ik i have one, but i keep them separate for a reason), TERFs, zionists, racists, misogynists, general dickheads, hateful people

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fun fact: i know where you sleep.

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tags, i will rarely use: #soup thoughts, #filled with soup

[maskdoll]

being an eternally regenerating magical girl means you should respect and honor me, not string me up and call me an "eternal punching bag". let me down this instant

[notaaronsroommate]

pride month.

ok, listen, shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up do not say any fuckshit you dumb bastards.

if you want to see sucking and fucking go to folsom street fair in San Fran, that's where you see people bouncing cocks off eachother and it's fine and self contained. No one is sucking and fucking at pride even if I wish they were. Everyone is fine there, yes whatever micro identity you just came up with, no one is stationed at the entryway to each blocked off street with a gaydar detector.

if you see the bank of america pridefloat shut the fuck up about it and ignore it. yeah, I KNOW. I been doin this for damn near 20 years at this point shut the fuck up "ooo corporate pride, pride was a riot" I KNOW. EVERYONE KNOWS. It is way BETTER if the billion dollar corporation thinks you are a non exterminatable customer base they must pander too rather than having no rainbow colored bullshit whatsoever.

shut the fuck up. shut the fuck up. get off the fucking computer. go get rammed up the ass. shut the fuck up.

[scramratz]

My least favorite new politically correct term is "unhoused." Like you can just tell it was created to make liberals feel less icky when talking about homeless people.

I was homeless. I was homeless as a child and as an adult. That shit sucks believe it or not.

The uncertainty. The ever-present grimy feeling from lack of access to running water. Having nothing to your name. The shame you feel is asking your fellow man for the bare minimum. Just so much shame, man.

"Unhoused" is so clinical. A technical term. Sure, its not incorrect, but it doesn't properly convey the emotional and psychological impact homelessness has on you.

You say "house", I think of a structure.

You say "home", I think of stability.

[holdoncallfailed]

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to deny location sharing and turn off personalized ads and reject all non-essential cookies and not set up siri and face ID

[yellow-cat]

when im 45 years old ill still be here posting like take my hand. lets go into menopause together

[dragon-in-a-fez]

I can clearly remember the moment I first realised my mother and I were living on completely different planes of existence. I was 7 years old and I came home from my school's first track and field day having placed second or third in every event. the teachers had been making jokes all afternoon about how many times they had to call my name. my friends thought I was cool as shit. my enemies thought I was cool as shit too, come to think of it. I was proud as hell. so I get home with the entire front of my shirt covered in ribbons like I was a military dictator who'd awarded himself every medal, I walk into the kitchen and tell my mum all about my day, and she goes "oh, that must be disappointing not getting any firsts." and I'm like no?? first of all the first place ribbons are red and I don't like red. second of all look at me. there's literally nowhere left on my body for accolades. I am fucking Jacked of All Trades. how could this possibly be a disappointment.

[fakemarried]

adding jacked of all trades to my vocabulary

[greatwhiteprivilege]

I LOVE MAKING PEOPLE HAPPY PLEASE SMILE I LOVE YOU

[april]

ⓘ Tip If you feel unfulfilled by how you spent your time today, you can stay up late to try to combat the sense of dissatisfaction. This will ensure that you feel even worse tomorrow.

[feluka]

imagine if i did my work. if i sat down and Did it. and it was Done. can you even imagine such a thing

[fakemarried]

girl in front of me at the airport drafting a long ass tumblr post good luck girl

[glowpart2]

Did you guys know that this isn’t your grave and you can get out of this hole? I just found out

[demilypyro]

vampires are so full of shit. "oh the human race is beneath us, you're just livestock to us" I don't think you know what livestock is. do you feed us? care for us? protect us from predators? no. you just slink around dark alleys and ambush people. that's not what a higher being does. that's a bottom feeder. a parasite. karate punches your head off

[aidashakur]

trials and tribulations ass year

[peachnix]

it sucks being an American because people from other countries will make fun of you for liking burger and you will try to be like NO! I EAT OTHER FOOD TOO! but you can't get the words out because you're too busy salivating over the idea of burger

[edraculation]

[wizardarchetypes]

2 me the perfect day is i wake up from my afternoon nap and take a shower and then my friend picks me up and we go buy like 4,000 calories worth of food each from taco bell and then we sit on the back porch and talk about the exact same thing we talked about the last time we hung out but we laugh just as hard like it’s new

[important-animal-images]

[princess-rosiebird]

[chilewithcarnage]

adios