{stitches} @fallintoflight - Tumblr Blog

When he

When he doesn’t understand the cause of

The reasons you cannot fall in love

When feeling safe becomes more than dust

And your held together with more than lust

Lost in this ocean of love

Trying to drown, But rising above

It’s a tug of the heart like an ebb and a tide

The seas unbearable ride

Consistent. And strong. Never feeling you belong.

I am the storm. You are the sea.

Oh the stories to come.

Legends and fairytales and happy ever afterters this is what we were chasing all along

A deadly combination mixed beautifully.

Ive gone out to lunch every Friday with my daughter since she was born. I continue this now that she is in school.

What have I learned? I learn that she gets sad because the new boy in her class didn’t have enough money for lunch and was scared to tell anyone. I didn’t have it to give but I put $20 on his lunch account only to find his newly single mother, magestic goddes, I understand, didn’t have money until the first and that was 48 hrs away.

I go to lunch with my daughter every Friday because I learned that she is the most popular kid in her class and became best friends with the little girl no one wanted to sit next to.

I never miss a Friday because she told me some kids don’t have snacks at snack time, and I remember being that child. So we bring the teacher boxes of snacks so no child goes without a snack at snack time.

A meant to be Friday when my little girl told me some of her classmates couldn’t afford books at the book fair so we brought books from home with cracked covers and torn pages and asked her teacher if we could leave a book donation box that suddenly other children began recycling books. Like a library but these books belonged to them and didn’t need to be returned.

This past Friday I sat and ate lunch with my daughter who’s classmate never gets to see his mom so we invited him to sit with us and we talked and we laughed. I may not be this child’s mom, but damn it, I am a mom.

As long as my daughter allows me to walk her to school, kiss her at those school doors, walk her home, join her for Friday lunches- I will. No matter how sick I am, how tired, running late, stressed, financially incapable... I will be there because I have learned my little girl has the biggest heart. My child is humble because being kind and thoughtful is just who she is. She trusts me. She trusts that I am the parent who will help without judgment. The tears in my eyes and the smile across my face. How blessed am I?

If you....

No, not if you, how...

How can you not see the damage you did to me

Yes I am fucked up

I am broken

I am the definition of abuse, triumph, failure

I love who I am, I am comfortable with myself

Someone like me doesn’t exist an 11 yr marriage and hate themselves

You see the soil is filth

But people like me are weeds

Tried, hard, true

No man can break me because I am broken

I will never be a rose with thorns instead I am a weed you make wishes with.

HOW can you not see?

The damage you’ve done

On your own, to me.

I just want to be the weedy flower plucked and loved by innocence.

You are not a stupid man, you stupid man, you.

My time with you has been fertalizer one day and weed killer in the next...

I went from a slender dandelion to a plump wish maker to a dandelion who thought it was a rose but dried out and became a wish maker all for your selfish need...

Only I am not meant to grant your wishes

You were never meant or wanted to make mine

I am not a rose. I am a weed.

I want a man to look into my darkness

Knowing a can devour him

This brave man will see my freckles as stars

My anxiety will be purple

My fear will be a hue of blue

My sadness a transparent aqua

My hopes and dreams maroon

My heart a shimmer of gold

My innocence a fluffy white

All of me in my darkest moments

smoke intertwined

paint in water

a hurricane

This man will see & feel my galaxy

#galaxy #art #love #depression #poetry #slam poet at 3am

I am just going to keep pretending

that I am okay, my darling

After all it’s what I’ve done

every single day since you went away

I capture the moments when I cannot breath

Ohhhh darling wouldn’t you believe me

If I said I feel beautiful

If I said I’m kiiiiind

If I said me doing this

Wasn’t killing me inside

Oh I just want be alone

But lonely just won’t leave me alone

Isn’t it funny how we both know

The longer we wait the more we grow

Because it’s 3 am and we both spend

All this time at the edge of the bed

Barely breathing neither of us conceding

Because you have work and I have kids

Isn’t that what true love is

Rest your head and we both pretend

We are sleeping peacefully

Broken hearts don’t mean broken dreams

That Promises are real things

The two of us were never meant to be

Both our hearts are not breaking

Oh oh oh darling

We just keep pretending

#knight nite

leigha31-deactivated20190922

goforfitdolls

I finalize my judgement of a mans attractiveness in the gym not by his physique but by his re-stacking abilities. I mean it’s just damn sexy when a man is considerate and knows how to put shit back where he found it.