Untitled Duck Game

no thoughts, just vibes - she/her

[ahyperactivehero]

obsessed with dungeon crawler carl lately, so enjoy these (text) posts 2/?

(ft. Carl and donut)

[isolabellz]

ilya’s birthday surprise

[huliajelena]

how‘s the water?

you‘re in it

yeah, but i want to know how you like it

[watermelontuesdays]

AU where Shane and Ilya don't hook up or have a decades-long secret. They don't really know each other at all, except to play each other.

Shane comes out of the closet sometime after Scott does, and in some random, lighthearted interview, they ask him what he's looking for in a man. And Shane's just, off-hand like, "Well, he'd have to have at least one Stanley Cup. Obviously." And when he gets a good reaction from that, he keeps going, like "Needs to be amazing at hockey. Definitely needs to be at least an All-Star, if not a captain. Hot too. If he can't bench-press me, I'm not interested."

And it's all in fun, except two days after the interview prints, Ilya Rozanov shows up at his door like "knock, knock. I am here to apply for boyfriend position. Do you need resume? I brought my Stanley Cup ring, just in case."

[kunfyouzed]

[rainbow-femme]

I love the idea of Shane being not just good at hockey but good at all sports, to the point where it fascinates and infuriates the other Centaurs

Because what do you mean they went to the batting cages for some silly fun to watch everyone flail at an unfamiliar sport, only for Shane to need three practice swings before figuring out the force and timing needed to start hitting every single pitch? What do you mean he sets the course record at the mini golf place they have the Pike twins birthday at? What do you mean he learned how to play cricket over a long weekend in the UK? What do you MEAN your Canadian ass that grew up on a calm, tiny lake went to visit Rose in LA and just learned to surf from “some guy” one of the days she was busy??

Shane doesn’t get why they all think it’s so crazy. He’s a professional athlete, he’s good at full body and mind control as well as adaptability and hand-eye coordination, and he’s so used to being the best in the world at hockey that he views being mundanely good at anything else as barely noticeable. He argues with Troy over whether he counts as being good at basketball just because he killed them all at the basketball shooting game at a Dave and Buster’s

They all start making bets to see who can find a sport Hollander isn’t good at. Harris is convinced he’ll win with figure skating because Shane’s muscle memory will want to work against him with a technique that’s so similar but also so different, only for Shane to come out of an afternoon learning from his old friend who was at the Olympics with the ability to do simple jumps and spins and is insisting the whole team learn so they can incorporate it into plays. Harris is not allowed to make suggestions after that

Ilya just sits back and lustily watches his husband destroy their friends at volley ball, wrestling, tennis, broom ball, and ultimate frisbee. Shane participates in an all pro athlete Ninja Warrior event to raise money for charity and Ilya can’t watch the clips of Shane flying through the course like a bat out of hell unless he is able to fuck Shane immediately after it ends

[hellenhighwater]

Well those are allllmost done

[codebreakerblue]

question. why do you have 7 featureless grey monoliths in your driveway

[hellenhighwater]

There's eight actually but the last one is still in the garage

[jackfromthefairytale]

question. why do you have eight featureless grey monoliths

[hellenhighwater]

They're actually a really dark purple

[fishofthewoods]

question. why do you have seven featureless really dark purple monoliths in your driveway and an eighth in the garage

[hellenhighwater]

Some of them do have features though. There's holes and hinges and stuff, so I can put secrets in em

[nobodywasneverhere]

question. why do you have 8 really dark purple occasionally featureful monoliths

[hellenhighwater]

The heart wants what the heart wants

[fred-the-dinosaur]

this reads like a muppet sketch

[fred-the-dinosaur]

see? See!??!

[hellenhighwater]

You're not wrong

[hellenhighwater]

This post is less than six months old.

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[hellenhighwater]

...ah.

[vonlipwig]

developing the hots for ryan gosling because of project hail mary is so fucking embarrassing I swear to god. that is a conventionally attractive man. a noted hollywood heartthrob. he's even blond, are you kidding me? did he win people magazine's sexiest man alive? I don't know. I'm not going to check but it wouldn't surprise me at this point. it's such a mainstream taste. such a clichéd celebrity crush. like oh I fancy ryan gosling and my favourite drink is coca-cola and my favourite snack is ready salted crisps. jesus christ. 'b-b-but i only like him when he's in a science pun tshirt and playing a dorky-awkward loner type!' doesn't matter. he's still ryan 'ken from barbie' gosling. it's so trite. I feel like the weird nerd girl in a teen coming-of-age romcom falling for the super popular jock. don't I know that I have a reputation to uphold here? cringe.

[fandomsandfairytales]

This post is the spiritual successor to that post about David Corenswet:

[jesterlesbian]

everybody neeeeeds to go read this new yorker cartoon article with jacob tierney!!!!! it's so good

[themoonandmyman]

Knight!Shane serves only one Prince…

Please reblog art :)

[luckydreaming]

Are fedoras really that bad?

YES YES THEY ARE

[onceuponakhaleesi]

voidethered:

ask-omnipony:

I don’t really believe this mumbo jumbo

I mean it’s a goddamn hat.

Right..?

The white rose, it symbolizes the unique beauty of all the women who wish not to be with a nice guy such as myse-

I wonder if this works with other kinds of hat…

Nothing ventured, nothing gained…

WHEEEN THE MOON HITS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE THAT’S AMORREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Men of Tumblr are my favorite kind of people…

[jamesbleach]

wait, does that mean?

oh boy…….

[usedtobehmc]

Luckily, this nonsense doesn’t work on girls.

Observe…

[rootbeergoddess-deactivated2017]

IT’S GOTTEN BETTER!

[coffeeandcursewords]

This post is immaculate

[mobians-and-chaos-blog]

It can’t be true.

And it can’t possibly work on motorcycle helmets.

I must test it.

Nothing happening so far…

[strampunch]

HOLY SHIT IT WORKS

[pokemon-chick-1personalblog-blog]

What in the world?

Oh why not? This should be interesting.

Here we go!

Were all mad here in Underland!

What the hell! Never Again!

… Actually …

One more time.

[combthecombel]

Alright, I gotta try this!

Can’t be that bad!

….

…oh my god…

[verityglasses]

ask-gmodsfmrocks:

LOL

This just gets better and better

[fairytail-angel]

This is one of my favourite things to look at

[strampunch]

holy shit this stuff is back

[livia-jones]

The Gravity Falls one though

[nightowlhowell]

i wonder if it works for flower crowns?

here goes nothin-

w HAT THE

DID I JUST-

WHAT THE FUCK

[artfulhobbes]

Okay Clearly something is up.

Hmm… I wonder

I’m sure nothing could possibly…

HOLY SHIT

[clolymoly-deactivated20190507]

IT GOT BETTER

[nukewolf]

I HAVE BEEN SEARCHING SO LONG FOR THIS POST OH MY GOD!!!

[cm8x-insanity]

I wonder what happens when you wear 8 of these at once…

[roses-in-fire]

Never not reblog

[ryrobsessed]

IT’S ON MY DASH. ACTUALLY ON MY DASH.

[cate-geo]

Oh my God, there are so many new ones

[dvonmc]

Friggin, yis

[wildishmazz]

Always reblog.

[the-last-teabender]

IT HAS EVOLVED

[evilblackcat13]

The legend marches on…

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

BEWARE THE MAGIC OF HATS

[bittythemagpiedragon-blog]

JDNXHSBSBF

[hotshotriot]

I T ‘ S  B A C K 

[99-cent-arizona-tea]

a classic meme from when the world was less of a tire fire

[teeble-spoon]

ITS ON MY BLOG YESSSS

[fandombandomrandom42]

THIS IS WONDERFUL.

[i-srsly-need-to-stop-deactivate]

time to bring back outdated memes…

what could possibly go wrong?

eww, it smells like fuckboi

welp, down this rabbit hole we go…

nothing’s happeni-

WTF-

[ofcosmicflux-deactivated2019013]

Oh boy, this meme

I wonder if this would work with a wolf hat.

May as well try it.

Please don’t be awful, please don’t be awful, please don’t b-

get wet 4 furry

[saucy-majora-deactivated2021062]

This is obviously fake

Look, I’ll prove it

Y’all are just acting

Watch and learn

WTFFFFFF

[knowledgemimic]

Should…… should I…….

[breathingcolorsblog]

DO IT!

[knowledgemimic]

Whelp guess I gotta put on the hat now

Can’t be that bad, I mean what’s the worst a squid hat can do to m-

I̖̝̪̤̠̋͞ ̛̹̱̮̳̭̓̂͑ͫ͐̎ͯ͗͝͡H͇̠͊́̚A̛̓̓҉͙̠V͍̌̏͂ͣͨͭͧ̉́E̸͙̭̣͓̓ͨͥ̿ ̽͗͗ͮ͊ͬͩͥ̚҉̪̗̝̘̟́̕A̴̴̙̝̬̪̞͂ͤͩ̍W͚̣͆ͬỎ̫̝̟͖̝͇ͥ͛ͮ͋K̨̖͓͉̺̫͉̀͗ͪ̊͌̉E͚̲̩̪̘̠͋̈͞N͉͓͕̗̱͒̔ͨͤ͛̓̂ͧ

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[starrylolo]

I’ve always wanted to show this to @theforwardslash

[half-a-hetero]

IT WAS A CULTURAL RESET. A CULTURAL RESET. 

[bees-with-tophats]

HAHAH

[frenchish-water]

Someone call UNESCO this dinosaur of a post needs to be protected

[fishfrommars]

I’m so glad it’s back to normal after that weird glitch from 2020

[lloyd-garma-gun]

THIS POST HAS CROSSED MY DASH SO MANY TIMES AAAAAAAAA

[kloudyco]

I FOUND IT AGAIN

[the-keeper-of-the-lemon-deactiv]

FUCKING LOVE THIS POST!! HAT TIME!!!

[mrdyketator]

Precisely *how* old is this post??

[mrdyketator]

Date of origin: 7:17 am, January 26th, 2014

[proxylynn]

[I found it…The sacred Tumblr World Heritage Post of Hats!]

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,401 species of frog in the world, ok?

[werewolf-transgenderism]

IMPORTANT UPDATE: 7,532 species of frog in the world, ok?!

[werewolf-transgenderism]

great news! 7,556 species of frog in the world, ok?!

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry, now there are 7,576 species of frog in the world, ok?!

[werewolf-transgenderism]

excellent news! 7,591 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet earth

[werewolf-transgenderism]

guess what! 7,624 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry, 7,645 species of frog on planet earth, ok? peace and love on planet autism

[werewolf-transgenderism]

great news! 7,653 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,670 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

[werewolf-transgenderism]

new year new frogs! 7,678 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,683 species of frog in the world, ok? ❤️

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,698 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet earth

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don’t cry. 7,701 species of frog in the world, ok?

[wandering-aloneo-o]

@markscherz how many of these do we get to thank you for again?

[markscherz]

95 at present, more on the way :)

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 95 species of frog discovered by tumblr's own frog scientist dr. mark scherz, ok?

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,758 species of frog in the world, yippee!

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,806 species of frog in the world, ok?

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don’t cry. 7,817 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet autism 💖

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,836 species of frog in the world, ok?

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,864 species of frog in the world, yay!

[werewolf-transgenderism]

hey don't cry. 7,935 species of frog in the world, yippeeeeee

[werewolf-transgenderism]

HEY DON'T CRY. 8,008 SPECIES OF FROG IN THE WORLD PER AMPHIBIAWEB AND THE 8,000TH FROG WAS DESCRIBED BY TUMBLR'S OWN FROG SCIENTIST DR. Scherz, ET AL., PEACE AND LOVE ON PLANET EARTH ‼️‼️‼️

[fairycosmos]

good morning to the beaten and the damned only

[beansfrombeans]

[bakwaaas]

You gotta understand that some people never really grow. They never learn their lesson. They never recognise their mistakes, they never acknowledge their faults, they never admit they were in the wrong. You will never receive an apology from them, and you will never see their behaviour change.

[lilybee]

if you’re in the notes saying “this is wrong and cruel because everyone is capable of growth” you’re not understanding the post.

yes, everyone is CAPABLE of growth and change. everyone has the RIGHT to growth and change. but no, not everyone will CHOOSE growth and change. some people are not interested in and cannot be made interested in self-improvement or self-reflection. some people will go their entire lives refusing to admit they might be wrong or examine their own behaviors. some people will never, ever accept responsibility for the effects they have on people and the world around them. humans are varied; some are just always gonna be like this.

it is VITAL to understand this if you’re the kind of person who tends to pour energy into helping others, especially if there are already people knowingly hurting you who consistently show absolutely no interest in changing that behavior. you can’t forcibly make them want to change who they are. you aren’t going to find a way to convince them to suddenly care that their behavior is hurting someone.

the motivation to change and grow comes from within. others may inspire us, but WE have to decide we want to be better and work towards that. until they decide that for themselves, nobody else can do it for them. and they might never. people are mortal. we are a finite series of choices. it is entirely possible to make mostly selfish ones.

everyone CAN grow, but not everyone will. not everyone wants to, and nobody can force the desire to grow as a person on someone else.

[jauntylittlefrillyboy]

Oh man I can't believe I forgot. You know that post that was like "tell me what clothes you've bought because of a character" or whatever. I searched for ages to find an adequate white cable knit sweater because of Ransom's in knives out.

[jauntylittlefrillyboy]

It's a good sweater

[jauntylittlefrillyboy]

I'm putting this here bc I feel like it's information everyone needs. You can find it here.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I don't knit but that's hilarious because this looks like such a complicated pattern for a beginner

[disaster-possum]

Oh it is. There's at least three different styles of cabling. And more advanced cabling at that. That sweater would take me like a year to finish.

[crossedwithblue]

All the cabling is done the same way. You just need to read your knitting and keep track of which row you're on

[itspronouncedtessa]

No, but for real. Knitting is just loops. Cables? Spicy loops. Lace? Spicy loops. Color work? Multicolored spicy loops.

There are no levels in knitting, there are no exams to pass or goals to achieve before you can continue.

The Handsome Chris is a perfect beginner project. It's all one color, it's knit flat, you get to learn lots of new techniques all at once, but most of all it's engaging and you're working towards a goal you really like.

I would have impaled myself on my needles if I'd been forced to complete a Sophie scarf before I got to advance to something more "challenging" like a washcloth, or God forbid a ribbed hat.

My very first project was a self-drafted 11-strand intarsia double sided cable scarf, because I didn't know I wasn't allowed and that was what I wanted to make.

This attitude of mystifying certain fabrics as advanced really twists my stitches. I cannot do simple stockinette colorwork to save my life, but I can 3-color brioche without looking.

There are no levels in knitting.

Make that fucking Handsome Chris if you want to, it's a great sweater. Or start with the Sophie scarf if that's more your vibe. But don't ever think that knitting is hard.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

You sound like me telling a beginner crocheter "nah the alligator stitch is easy for a beginner, it's all just double crochets!" (a real thing I have said to people picking up a crochet hook for the first time). I'm not saying you can't start with a complicated stitch I'm saying it's very funny when people do.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#I mean. knitting and crochet both just build onto very basic stitches#once you know the basics it’s short work to do those ‘harder’ stitches#you just gotta practice them!

"Once you know the basics" is my point. Beginners do not know the basics. I am a beginner knitter and let me tell you we're doing shit like "trying to remember how to cast on", "not dropping too many stitches and going on without noticing if you can help it", "trying to figure out how to keep consistent tension so the width of the project doesn't keep changing", and "trying to remember the difference between a knit and a purl because at least a quarter of these stitches are definitely backwards".

[jmtorres]

[tasscelium]

I do understand the point being made here and agree it is very funny when Overachiever Fiber Artists dive headfirst into the deep end BECAUSE that's me.

I did one big swatch of garter stitch with some random yarn I had and two pencils instead of actual needles, and then immediately moved on to a whole blanket, which became my first real finished project. Next finished thing after that was a pillow with cables, and then I decided to do a color block version of that same pillow.

Like, there's different kinds of beginners obviously but if someone looked at that and went 'I'm doing that sweater as my first Real Project' I'd be like hell yeah brother

[the-fibre-stuff]

Both as someone who made a sweater (colourwork, not cables) as an early project, and as someone who teaches a cable knitting class, I am very much on the side of "there's no such thing as hard knitting". I will, however, acknowledge that there is knitting that you don't have enough skill to make turn out in a way you like.

(The challenge with my classes is that most of the people who should be taking them, instead of just having picked them up already, are beginners, and I need them to understand that it's perfectly reasonable to learn cables if you only just know how to knit and purl.)

That said, if you're at a point where "there's no such thing as difficult knitting" means "you can make a sweater instead of a potholder", yes, a cable sweater isn't a great idea. Give it a few months (or a sweater).

I think we also need to remember that whether or not the knitting is a problem, understanding the pattern instructions is likely to be a challenge for an inexperienced knitter.

[bugslibraryy]

Ok but like when they are husbands their favourite part of their day is getting to go to bed together. And yes now they are lucky they get practice and training and games together- they get so much together but after all those years of so long- so much apart from each other, they are so greedy for time together. And Ilya loves it because they have a routine, he has a night time routine. Teenage would sooner think he was dead at this age than he has a husband and a night time routine. Shane almost always heads upstairs before him, because he likes the do the dishes and kitchen after dinner and in turn Ilya prefers to lock up and sort out Anya for the night. If it’s after a day off or training day they will peel up off the couch- or if it’s after a home game or travel day it’s dinner and then right upstairs.

Shane will go up first, with a kiss for Ilya- to his shoulder or cheek or ear or forehead- wherever he can land one- and then Ilya will go about making sure all the doors and windows are locked and shut, pack away anyas toys and fold the blankets from the couch. He’ll fill up his and Shane’s water bottles, and then Anya will follow him up the stairs once he’s turned off the lights. Shane will be in the shower and Ilya will turn down their bed, get rid of all the extra pillows and fold back the covers, settle Anya in her dog bed with many goodnight kisses and then put their waterbottles on the beside tables.

Sometimes he’ll meet Shane in the shower, share the end of Shane’s shower with him, help him rinse out his hair or kiss his shoulders, steal a cuddle and more kisses under the water. Sometimes Shane will be done by the time Ilya gets in to the bathroom and he’ll just squeeze his hip in passing as he goes to strip and shower. Ilya puts his clothes in the hamper, showers while he watches Shane do his skincare at their double sinks. By the time he’s out of the shower Shane is gone, the smell of his minty toothpaste left behind and it’s so stupid but Ilya misses him, a little, while he brushes his own teeth and scrubs on some moisturiser, the same one Shane uses because he likes that the smell reminds him of him.

Once he’s done he walks into the bedroom and Shane is always laying on Ilya’s side of the bed, (reading or scrolling or sometimes on the phone to his parents) “warming it up” for ilya because he always complains about how cold Ilya’s hands and feet are- and Ilya says it not his fault Shane seems to always run hot and that of course Ilya will feel cold in comparison. It makes Ilya’s heart squeezed, seeing Shane laying in his spot for him. Ever time. And then Ilya will tug on boxers and crawl into bed, make a production of shuffling Shane out of his side of the bed, and he’ll link their feet together under the sheets, because he knows shane doesn’t like his reading interrupted and Ilya will scroll until Shane has read his two chapters and then Shane will neatly fold his glasses and book and place it on the bedside table and Ilya will plug his phone in and then roll into Shane for cuddles now that his reading is done and they talk like that, pressed close together in bed, between soft kisses and squeezes and nuzzles to be closer and they will fall asleep like that, so much love between them and Ilya can’t wait to do it all again the next night.

[giftofgabfic]

these are the epub covers i’ve made for the fanfics ive finished so far… the writers in this fandom are insanely talented. i hope to one day find the energy to print and bind them all for my physical book shelf but for now - digital will do 🙃

ps i haven’t used tumblr since like 2012 so idk how best to tag people or anything. would love the authors to see these though!

@not-close-to-straight @milominderbindered @proseandpulse cc the other authors i can’t find on here!

[proseandpulse]

that Immune cover especially 🥹

Thank you 🩵

[victusinveritas]

[razielim]

oh i'm going to misusle and straight up fuckle this knowledge so badly