blue night radio ♡ 170217
translation: fantaemsie
listener (message): when i was a teenager i was a really gloomy child. it seemed like the whole world had turned it’s back on me. i believed i was the only one in the world. back then someone uttered these words to me: “everyone lives like that. you’re not the only one having a hard time. everyone lives in difficulty, and diligently, as much as you do.” at that time, rather than getting hurt by these words i thought: “that’s right so i’ve behaving like a child.” that’s why, from then on, i lived really diligently, only looking straight head. even though, because of my family’s circumstances, i got into college a bit late compared to other people, i pushed my own self with a rod of iron and i refused to face my own wounds since i trusted that, other than me, there are other people who are having a tough time and that everyone is living working hard as much as i do. i live diligently. then i thought: i could be even better, an even more of a good person. however, after i ran and ran diligently like that, now that i’m going to graduate i turned out to be someone who gets angry and annoyed at everything. i get angry at the words the other opponent would throw in without any meaning. i’d get angry with a: “what do you know?”. little by little i hated meeting other people and i’m just preparing to find a job while only looking straight ahead. however …, i suddenly got this thought: why am i comparing my own pain with other people’s suffering? why did i make other people’s misfortune the basis to my happiness? all of a sudden these words i heard years ago occurred to me again: “everyone lives like that. you’re not the only one having a hard time.” it seemed like i’d fall behind if i didn’t do anything, that i’d really become someone who’s oblivious to everything - casting a spell that everyone lives like that, that i’m not the only one having a tough time. i pressured and harassed myself. i couldn’t be caring to myself. i was only too strict to myself. i couldn’t love myself, the one that needed love the most. at last, i want to say this to myself: “you lived diligently. more than anybody else you lived fiercely. it’s alright. you can rest now.” today, my status message: “it’s alright even if you don’t do anything.”
jonghyun: “everyone lives like that, you’re not the only one having a hard time.” these words …, i think it’s the most wrong way of consolation in the world. the comparing with the other opponent, with different people. you know how there are these words? “live with the courage to die”; well …, these words? i think it’s the worst way of consolation. comfort …, to someone who’s having a hard time, someone who’s gloomy / depressed, to an exhausted person, to say: “when you get these thoughts, think of …, when you get those thoughts, courageously, do something different …, ya, right now, since you’re having a hard time like that: you’re exhausted, tired and having negative thoughts. i think it’d be good to quickly put that energy on the move and quickly take care of the work you need to get done.” to be honest, that person was aware of this too. they already know it’ll be solved by quickly moving on. they really immensely wish for it to be that way. however, it’s not working that way. there’s another thing other than the body’s wounds that you can see with your own eyes: it’s the heart’s wounds and, because of that, when comforting someone, i think one should think of how there’s certainly another existence, something that my eyes can’t see. of course, me too, while talking about this, since there are certainly words i gave to someone and wounds i’ve received from someone, i wanted to complain and talk a bit about this to our dear listeners. when comforting someone, rather than consoling them by comparing, whether comparing them to yourself or another person’s situation, i think it’d be nice to just have a talk about that person, them solely.
gracieabrams
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gummygunk
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