fuckin disgusting.

sideblog for fangedup

[meanbuddhist]

what they don’t tell you is that it lives inside you until you let it out

[lunaotic]

I shouldn't trust you

[fangfuckt]

was starting to have an episode, heart was racing. started thinking lewd thoughts about my wife, heart rate has settled within minutes

[fangfuckt]

itching to get violent

[fangfuckt]

i need that anticipation. i need something to brew. an argument. a fight. i need it to escalate.

feel the air thicken.

feel my heart slow when we get a little too close face-to-face.

[fangfuckt]

itching to get violent

[fangfuckt]

he still hasn't woken up

[fangfuckt]

12 hours

so much blood

i didnt mean to hurt him that bad

[lustcannibalism]

ok I endured it. now what!!!!!!!!!

[fangfuckt]

the sad thing is i knew exactly what it meant. but i don't get why. i've been maintaining this diet. i haven't slipped. i've been focused. working harder. training more.

and yet.

i look at people. i SEE things. i try to tell myself it's this sense of justice, but.

my teeth ache.

[fangfuckt]

purging bad people scratches a certain itch in my brain

[bones-ivy-breath]

ALT

Preface, Tragedy: A Curious Art Form by Anne Carson, from Grief Lessons

[fangfuckt]

I still don't like that mf

[dirty]

Car sex while it’s heavily raining outside >>

[samvents]

[ID text — i begged God to save me and he shoved more torment down my throat to keep me quiet]

[fangfuckt]

wow

[fangfuckt]

i wanna plan things but i feel like i just pushed everyone away.

[fangfuckt]

Do you feel like you're a good person?

uh.. I really don't know the answer to that one lol. I'd like to think I am, but who doesn't? I'm not the best there is. I'm angry, can be volatile, ugly heart. But I helped pay for a little girl's chemo and simultaneously got flowers to gift my wife. I helped this little old lady load all her groceries into her car and was able to reach a cereal box that a little kid wanted at the store. I do things like that but AM I good? I have no idea.