Hah!

Fallout OC RP blog for a strange magician.side blog, follows come from commonwealth-commoners

[fantastic-julian]

@unpluggeduprooted [Okay, okay, let’s not linger on this one too much. They instead lead the way, twisting down a few alleys and carefully dodging clumps of dirty old snow. For once they don’t have much to say, until they finally touch down at the ruins of an apartment complex; from the outside, it looks like a functional multi-story housing unit, but upon pushing aside what is left of the door it’s revealed to have collapsed to nothing but a frame. There’s a veritable mountain of rubble in the middle of all of this, the leftovers from the floors and roofs and walls that have toppled in as if there was great weight placed in the center.

Julian sets the umbrella aside and opts to grasp Beckett’s hand, leading zir up to the top of the rubble. There’s a plateau there, and they seem to have laid out a blanket like this is some sort of picnic. Hoping ze’ll follow suit, Julian sits down on one side of the blanket]

Do you like this place? I think it’s nice!

[unpluggeduprooted]

It’s. Um. You know. What y-you said. Nice.

[Beckett hesitates. Ze hovers on the edge of the blanket. Looking here. And there. Stretched out as far as ze can go, while a) still letting Julian hold zir hand politely and b) straining to avoid stepping zir dirty boots on the blanket.]

[fantastic-julian]

[Jules smiles and holds out a hand, as if ze would need physical help stooping down to reach them] Sit if you’d like! I plan to chatter on for… a while, so, best to get comfortable as to create that eye-to-eye atmosphere?

[they lack that pizzazz in their voice, that ‘show quality’ they prefer to carry. Nerves are stacking on them like plates they’ve got to spin, and they would love for zir to sit down so they can buy another second of time in zir adjusting and positioning that they can categorize as 'before I told zir,’ before tipping into the dangerous area of 'now that ze knows.’

[fantastic-julian]

@unpluggeduprooted [Okay, okay, let's not linger on this one too much. They instead lead the way, twisting down a few alleys and carefully dodging clumps of dirty old snow. For once they don't have much to say, until they finally touch down at the ruins of an apartment complex; from the outside, it looks like a functional multi-story housing unit, but upon pushing aside what is left of the door it's revealed to have collapsed to nothing but a frame. There's a veritable mountain of rubble in the middle of all of this, the leftovers from the floors and roofs and walls that have toppled in as if there was great weight placed in the center. Julian sets the umbrella aside and opts to grasp Beckett's hand, leading zir up to the top of the rubble. There's a plateau there, and they seem to have laid out a blanket like this is some sort of picnic. Hoping ze'll follow suit, Julian sits down on one side of the blanket] Do you like this place? I think it's nice!

[commonwealth-commoners]

Beckett: "You're all wet.."

[They’re confused for a second, like they hadn’t even considered the possibility, but a smile flutters open on their face when they pat their hair thoughtfully] Hah! So I am! Wet enough to …. sorry, I’m nervous about all of this, so it may take a few minutes for the jokes of any quality to arrive.

[unpluggeduprooted]

[Ze twists zir hands together, looking anywhere but Julian. The synth looks better today. Like ze’s slept at least a wink. Ze’s sitting under a small alcove, on a building across from the bar. Mostly out of the snow, except for the little white mounds of it on zir boot toes.]

What did you want to say?

[fantastic-julian]

[ At least they can take small comfort in knowing zir doesn't look quite so haggard and weatherbeaten today. It's likely going to emit some sort of precipitation later, so they've brought their umbrella. Popping it up over their head, they silently offer a bit of real estate underneath]

Do you mind if we go on a walk first? I'd prefer to talk in private. Nothing fishy, I promise! Unless you'd like to meet near a lake, in which case it's a bit fishier than I'd like, but, besides that-

[loveableghostson]

reblog if your muse has a butt

not a great one

not a terrible one

just an acceptable butt

[backalleyclinic-blog]

“What better way to end the day than by treating a herniated disk or two? Possibly a torn tendon. It’s better than a quiet night spent reading. No, by all means, do incredibly stupid things. I don’t need to sleep.”

[fantastic-julian]

A torn tendon, or as I like to call it, a torndon-

[backalleyclinic-blog]

Julian, you have ten seconds to exit this clinic. You may stay, provided you are seeking medical treatment for yourself or an associate. Those are my terms.“

[fantastic-julian]

Oh, but I am seeking medical treatment :> !

[backalleyclinic-blog]

You have ten seconds to prove it. Ten. Nine. Eight.

[fantastic-julian]

Oh, but Dr. McCoy! Look right here between my ribs! I'm suffering a broken heart!!

[backalleyclinic-blog]

“What better way to end the day than by treating a herniated disk or two? Possibly a torn tendon. It’s better than a quiet night spent reading. No, by all means, do incredibly stupid things. I don’t need to sleep.”

[fantastic-julian]

A torn tendon, or as I like to call it, a torndon-

[backalleyclinic-blog]

Julian, you have ten seconds to exit this clinic. You may stay, provided you are seeking medical treatment for yourself or an associate. Those are my terms.“

[fantastic-julian]

Oh, but I am seeking medical treatment :> !

[backalleyclinic-blog]

“What better way to end the day than by treating a herniated disk or two? Possibly a torn tendon. It’s better than a quiet night spent reading. No, by all means, do incredibly stupid things. I don’t need to sleep.”

[fantastic-julian]

A torn tendon, or as I like to call it, a torndon-

[fantastic-julian]

Okay. I… let's talk about this tomorrow morning. I want to meet with you somewhere when there’s light out and… I’ve got some things to tell you. But, before I let you go, I just want to say: that’s sort of mean to synths, don’t you think? I’ve got lots of good synth friends, but… best of all of them is you. I don’t think a drop less of you for this. I promise, a-and you won’t get me to that point either.

Please, if you don’t mind, meet me right outside of Goidneighbor in the morning? We’ll go for a walk and… well, you can hear my half of this story.

[unpluggeduprooted]

fantastic-julian:

Beckett…

[they inhale a quaking breath and sigh it out in an attempt at steadying these frazzled feelings. Ze’s got zir fingers pressed hard against the purple fabric of their suit, enough so that it’s hurting a little, and they wonder if ze can see the sadness in their eyes from here. Tell zir. Tell zir the truth. It will help you both to come out with it and tell the truth, because maybe if ze knows ze’s not alone, ze might not hate zirself so much.]

“Now, hah, you know that’s not true. There are lots of lovely people who are synths. I know…I know a lot of folks have a prejudice against synths, but– but those people are wrong, and I’m sorry to say that so are you!” [They’re trying so so hard to keep this all together. Now, time to break the news;] 

But, I’m certainly not in that group! I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, and, hah, I! I don’t think for a minute that you’re broken. 

[So close.] 

Then you don’t know me at all, do you.

[Beckett Lake finds zirself in that upsetting spiral, where one has cried quite enough, but can’t imagine what else ze can do but be miserable. Ze releases zir grip on Julian’s shoulder, and with one hands, tries to smooth out the wrinkles ze’s left on their sleeve. The other hand’s occupied with wiping zir face– the tears are freezing, and it stings, and so on.]

I’m sorry. I’m. You’re supposed to hate me. I’ve been lying to you. I’m not human. [Feebly said, face hidden behind a scrap of cloth.] I don’t. I don’t– I– I don’t understand you.

[fantastic-julian]

[Julian dips into a bigger frown, clearly unfamiliar to their usual range of expressions. This whole conversation keeps getting worse and worse with every turn, but they need to keep chipping away at it.]

Beckett, [they're staying calm, but it is now time for them to take hold of zir shoulders] do you really think that someone being a synth is enough to warrant hating them? Do you truly believe that's enough?

[fantastic-julian]

unpluggeduprooted:

You don’t– even understand– what people think– I’m not a person. Someone p-put me together, and they put me together wrong. I’m not human, Julian.  I’m fake.  I was never born. I don’t know if I’ll, if I’ll ever die or just. Break down. Like an old car. You know what they did? You know? They, they stole a real person, and they put me where he should be, but I’m not him. I’m not Beckett, and there are people who probably miss him. I stole his life then I threw it away, because even as a fucking synth, I’m broken.

[Ze grips Julian by the shoulders, fingers digging in harder than ze intends. Too swept up in zir own self-loathing to see outside zirself for five seconds, hmm? Beckett shakes zir head violently.] 

Everything is wrong with being a synth, Julian. Everything.

Beckett...

[they inhale a quaking breath and sigh it out in an attempt at steadying these frazzled feelings. Ze’s got zir fingers pressed hard against the purple fabric of their suit, enough so that it’s hurting a little, and they wonder if ze can see the sadness in their eyes from here. Tell zir. Tell zir the truth. It will help you both to come out with it and tell the truth, because maybe if ze knows ze’s not alone, ze might not hate zirself so much.]

“Now, hah, you know that’s not true. There are lots of lovely people who are synths. I know...I know a lot of folks have a prejudice against synths, but-- but those people are wrong, and I’m sorry to say that so are you!” [They’re trying so so hard to keep this all together. Now, time to break the news;] 

But, I’m certainly not in that group! I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it, and, hah, I! I don’t think for a minute that you’re broken. 

[So close.] 

[karolinadeaen]

Wes Gibbins in Season 2: I Want You to Die (2.07)

[fantastic-julian]

[Yep. There it is. There it is. Julian wasn't sure what the lie was; they'd gone in with no expectations. Of course that frankly pompous brotherhood soldier would break up with someone just because they're a synth. Julian wants to touch zir face, or kiss zir hands, hold zir and say that it's all alright. They want to tell the truth. For once.

They're the same.

Julian tears up, eyes welling in an otherwise blank expression. Say something. Anything! Anything will do, Fantastic, but telling zir the facts about yourself would help. Tell zir that you have huge gaps in your memory of the past, and that you ran away from home because you couldn't handle the implications or the fear that someday the invisible commonwealth boogeyman is going to come back looking for you. Let zir know that you even stole your brother's name, to let Taylor truly die when they got replaced. Drop it all, right here, right now.

Jules pulls their mouth into a smile, hopes Beckett won't look them in the eye and notice the crying, and works hard to pass it all off as compassionate relief.]

Oh. Oh, Beckett. You're getting so worked up over this? There's nothing wrong with being a synth! Hah! Gosh, you had me going there for a second! I like synths, frankly, so I stand by saying that your ex was wrong, wrong as the day is long. But, I can see you're not pleased about it, and I can only imagine how hard it is, but your secret is under my hat and safe with me. Hah! Haha! Come here, you wonderful thing. You're worth all the caps in the world to me, okay? You're going to be okay.

[as they pull Beckett in for another hug, Julian the Fantastic has never felt more guilty in their entire life than they do right at this minute]

[fantastic-julian]

[[ and if u look closely, you can see the exact moment julian’s heart ripped in half :D ]] 

[fantastic-julian]

unpluggeduprooted:

No, no, no, no. No. You don’t understand. He was right to leave. I’ve been lying to him, to y-you, to everyone, for months! You don’t get it. I don’t deserve your kindness, Julian, I don’t. 

[and yet ze can’t bring zirself to pull away from it. ze trembles as ze holds back the tears– ze’s tired of crying, but ze can’t stop, and everything feels wrong and bad. Ze can’t even stand zirself.]

I should, I should just die already. Hhh. I’m not doing anyone any good. I’m not–

[Julian the Fantastic, synth, magician, and all around actual liar as far as they’re concerned, feels like their heart is actually breaking with each word ze says. They empathize, but can’t even admit to that much. They’re going to carefully reach out and caress that face, an attempt at comfort without crowding.] 

Sshh shh-- Beckett, I know that sometimes we have to lie to make things work, but...even if you don’t deserve it, which, I stand by my assertion that you do, I’m going to keep giving my kindness to you. I’m unmoveably stubborn like that.... 

If you died, things would get lonely around here, you know. I wont.. I wont sit here and tell you the one hundred reasons that I want to you keep living, because I know you wont want to hear them, but...Beckett, no one deserves to die. Most of all not you. And PRINCE was wrong. I don’t know what transpired but he’s wrong.  

[fantastic-julian]

unpluggeduprooted:

I don’t. I can’t. He– [ze takes a shaky breath] –he was so angry. He– I, I don’t want to think about it anymore. I can’t. [Beckett buries zir face against Julian’s shoulder, suddenly tightening zir arms around them. Quietly, not meant to be heard,] I deserve it. I’m not a good person. 

[This embrace would have been better in ...a lot of different circumstances. Not this. Never this. They put both arms around zir again, letting one hand carefully thread into zir hair if ze’ll allow it to rest there.] 

You don’t have to talk about it, it’s okay-- wait, no, none of that, Beckie. You are a good person. You’re a sweet-- sorry, okay, I know you don’t like that. But...hey, I’ll pass along this bit of insurance: no matter what happens, Beckett, I’m going to stand by you as your best friend. Lots of people would want a magician best friend, right? I like to think so. 

[fantastic-julian]

unpluggeduprooted:

Oof– [Beckett stumbles, catching at Julian to catch zir balance.] I’m…um. He, he ended things. Between us. You know. Uh. I’m alright. 

[Ze does not look anywhere near alright. Not even in the near orbit of alright. Zir eyes looks huge in zir too-thin face, and it’s altogether not an ideal picture of a Beckett Lake.]

How are you?

[Their face falls. Falls past just ‘not smiling,’ already a feat for them, and plunges down into concern and sadness. The thin frame ze’s sporting isn’t going unnoticed either. ]

Oh--you’re. Beck. I’m so sorry. I-- do you need to talk about it? What happened? [and a mild distrust for the BOS aides the small spark of fire in this next question:] He didn’t hurt you, did he?  

[fantastic-julian]

unpluggeduprooted:

Ha. That’s, uh, that’s me! Hello, Julian.

Beckett I missed you SO MUCH! Oh -- [ get hugged, tight and lingering ] Are you okay? H-have you been eating? is your boyfriend taking care of you? Wh-are you keeping warm? You’ve been gone for weeks I wasn’t sure I’d see you ag-- I’m-- Hah, I’m glad you’re safe.