In 2010 the idea to blog first fell into my heart, I had always felt as though there was so much I wanted to say, so many injustices I wanted to speak out against yet so much positivity and love I wanted to celebrate and share, and I had finally found the perfect platform for my thoughts and ideas to bloom.
However as time passed I had grown so familiar of the likes of Shirley B Eniang and Patricia White to For Harriet and Media Diversified that the thought of trying to create a blog akin to theirs was intimidating, so I – like I typically do when I find myself in such situations – quickly pushed the idea to the back of my head.
As the years rolled by in spite of all the encouragement from family, friends and even strangers on the street I had not really entertained the idea, I repressed it. I had not completely given up on the idea but it was definitely something I did not feel I was mature enough to pursue, especially given the high standard blogging seemed to have attained. Being the perfectionist I am, I was scared to try and fail
‘Satisfaction lies in the effort, not in the attainment. Full effort is full victory’ - Mahatma Ghandi
(I do love me a good quote ... You will get used to it though)
This is a quote I came across during my first year of exams at university, the struggle was real that term and I needed to maintain motivation and focus. This quote inspired me and reminded me that nothing I do is in vain. I knew in my heart that I was supposed to be on that degree program at that particular university. I learnt that I needed to lose myself and trust my heart; there was no need to be fearful because hearts don’t lie, once I put in the time and effort I will succeed. Three years later I graduated and I am now on a double masters programme with plans to pursue a PhD in the near future.
Despite that lesson, last year, however I went through somewhat of a quarter-life crisis I turned 21! I resented the idea of getting older and I spent the better part of the year reflecting on what I had failed to achieve I did not feel like I was ready or that I was mature or grown enough to say that I was twenty one, it was something I had no control over
It's a terrible thing, I think in life to wait until you are ready. I have this feeling that no one is ever ready to do anything. There is almost no such thing as ready. There is only now. And you may as well do it now. Generally speaking, now is as good a time as any - Hugh Laurie
Approaching the New Year I decided that such negative thinking was counter-productive leaving me with nothing but regrets and unfulfilled potential, instead there is no time better than the present to listen to my heart… time to bloom…
WELCOME TO MY BLOG ... FAR FROM BASIC - Supporting and Celebrating the Wholeness of the Black Woman stay tuned...
Ps. Keep up with my journey at http://melanin-memoirs.tumblr.com #storytellingsaveslives
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