Farahquotes

IG @farahquotes__

[farahquotes]

Grief is fear. Fear of losing what you have already lost. Fear of forgetting what has already gone. You live in a constant state of anxiety, always on your tiptoes. It’s like knowing there’s an insect in your room. You see it for a second and then it disappears. Now you can’t sleep. You know it’s still there; you just can’t see it. You try to distract yourself. You busy yourself with other things. Yet your eyes keep drifting back to the place where you saw it last. You call your sister to help you find it, but even she can’t. The color of grief is the same as the color of the room. So you wait. You wait for it to appear again. And when it does, the fear returns with it. The pain stings, you flinch, you scream, and then you sit there watching it - unable to look away. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

When you grow up, certain memories come crawling back. Usually the ones you spent years trying to bury. They are so painful that you begin to wonder if they really happened at all. Maybe it was a dream. Maybe you imagined it. Maybe your mind made it up. I have memories like that. The moment they surface, I push them back down. Go back. Stay where you’ve been all these years. But how do people heal from things they never talk about? How do you accept that you were young and it was never your fault? And if it wasn’t your fault, then whose was it? Sometimes I hate myself for what happened. More often, I hate the person I became afterward - the things I tolerated, the things I agreed to, all because I wanted to be loved. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

Death has taken so many people from me that I have become sensitive to it. It makes me feel helpless. There is something deeply unsettling about knowing that no matter how much we love someone, we have no control over whether they stay. At one point, I believed death was the kindest way to lose a person. I do not think that anymore. Now I feel that even if someone is no longer a part of my life, I am grateful that they are somewhere in this world, alive and breathing under the same sky. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

You who always want something from me, can’t you see my pale face, my dark circles, my broken heart, my crushed soul? You keep asking, you keep wanting, you keep taking… Can’t you just let me be? Can’t you just let me die? You keep waking me up, you keep pulling me back, only because you want something more from me. But I’ve already given you everything. There is nothing left. I’m empty. Can’t you just let me go? Why must I keep existing for you? Why can’t you, for once, think about me and let me die? ~ farah

[farahquotes]

In fairy tales, the prince always comes when you’re in trouble. He saves you, takes you away, and shows you a world you’ve never seen before. But why do people disappoint us in reality? Why do they take a happy soul and crush it? Why do they steal someone’s spark and leave them dull, empty, and questioning everything they once believed in? What has happened to us? To men, to women, to love itself? If you don’t have the courage to stay, why start something with a vulnerable heart? Why make someone to believe in love and then leave them all alone and miserable?

~ farah

[farahquotes]

I am the worst version of myself when I’m angry. In those moments, I want to hurt the other person. And I know exactly where to press, exactly which wound to touch. That’s what scares me. I always thought I was different. I thought that no matter how angry I became, I would never hurt the people I loved. But it turns out I’m no different from anyone else. When anger takes over, I become the very thing I promised myself I would never be. I say the things I know will sting. I reach for the places I know are already bruised. And afterward, what haunts me isn’t their reaction - it’s the realisation that I was capable of it at all.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

I lose interest in things so easily. One minute, I’m excited about something; the next, it feels futile, and I no longer want to do it. It’s as if I’ve lost all my energy. All I want to do is sleep. It happens so often now. Sometimes, all it takes is a single comment from someone, and suddenly nothing feels worthwhile anymore. Everything I was looking forward to loses its meaning. Then my mind drifts to death. I find myself thinking that maybe only then will my misery end. One day, I’m excited to be alive, making plans, imagining a future. The next, I crave death like a person lost in the desert craves water. I swing between wanting to live and wanting it all to be over, never knowing which version of myself will greet me when I wake up tomorrow. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

Some days, it’s hard to get out of bed. It feels like the mattress has grown teeth, ready to swallow me whole. My mind is numb, my body heavy with burdens I cannot identify. My mother keeps calling for me, again and again, but how do I explain that I have no energy left? That even lifting myself from these sheets feels impossible? All I want to do is lie here, close my eyes, and sleep.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

Humans are complicated . We are full of contradictions. We want to be understood, yet we struggle to understand ourselves. We seek honesty from others while withholding it from our own reflection. We spend years trying to discover who we are, only to look away when we finally find the answer.

~farah

[farahquotes]

I have always believed that the people who say, “I don’t care,” are often the ones who care the most. Not because they are dishonest, but because caring is vulnerable. It is easier to act indifferent than to admit that something, or someone, has the power to affect us. Yet beneath all our masks and defenses, I think we all care more than we are willing to admit. We care about ourselves. We care about the people we love. We care about being seen, valued, respected, and understood. We care about things both big and small, even when we convince ourselves otherwise. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

I wish I was a pet in my house. My mother would baby-talk to me instead of raising her voice. She would never look at me with disappointment. I would not have to measure every word before speaking or live in fear. She would love me simply because I exist. Everyone would adore me. No one would expect perfection from me. I would not have to constantly prove that I am worthy of being here. And the strangest part is that I would not even need to speak. I would be fed when I am hungry, held when I seek comfort, bathed, cared for, taken on walks, hugged, kissed, cherished. My silence would not be misunderstood. My existence alone would be enough to deserve affection. Oh, how heartbreaking. How strange that it feels easier to imagine being loved as a pet than as a daughter in my own home. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

I’ve never considered taking my life. But I want it to end on its own. There’s nothing about it that excites me. There’s no spark, no drive, just an overwhelming desire for it all to end quietly. While others think about longevity, I’m drawn to the idea of an early ending. Life feels more like something I’m enduring rather than experiencing. Living feels like a curse, a relentless cycle that drains every ounce of energy. I’ve become detached from the world around me. People feel distant, life feels hollow, and everything seems like a monotonous passage of time. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

I am into sunsets and sunrises. I like pretty skies and twinkling stars. I stare at the moon all night. I am into books with amazing plots. I like to walk when it’s windy outside. I could stare at flowers all day long. But most of all, I’m into you - your pretty smile and deep hazel-colored eyes. I could stare at your face all the time. I like the mole near your nose, your long eyelashes, and your lame jokes. I like when you listen to my stupid worries. I love each and every part of you. I love the you who is in love with me. I love the you who is kind to me. You are my book-worthy love story.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

I struggle to hate people completely. Because even when someone breaks my heart, a part of me still wonders what broke theirs first.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

I feel there is no amount of love capable of healing me. I am just a sad soul. I find sadness in everything. I am so consumed by self-pity that no amount of love can soften it. I have made a pact with the idea of being unlovable. It has settled deep into my being. So even when I am loved, I still grieve for some other kind of love. Maybe that is what I am at my core - grief. And perhaps that will never change.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

How long can you go without talking? I can go for weeks, or months, or years. I have never been a person of talking. I would rather be silent than speak. Sometimes I stay quiet for so long that I start talking to myself, just to hear my own voice, just to make sure I haven’t lost it.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

Love was never quiet in my house. It was loud and devastating and impossible to hold without bleeding. And sometimes I hear my mother in me. In the way I break things when I feel too much. In the way I push people away before they can leave on their own. In the way I take back every soft thing I say because being loving for too long makes me feel exposed, weak, ashamed. I spent so much of my life promising myself I would become different. Softer. Kinder. Easier to love. But no matter how hard I try, there are days I feel her living inside me like an old wound stitched into my bones. And it terrifies me. The thought that maybe pain is inherited. Maybe some people do not pass down jewelry or recipes or family heirlooms. Maybe they pass down rage. Maybe they pass down the inability to love without destruction attached to it. ~ farah