Farahquotes

IG @farahquotes__

[farahquotes]

Humans are complicated . We are full of contradictions. We want to be understood, yet we struggle to understand ourselves. We seek honesty from others while withholding it from our own reflection. We spend years trying to discover who we are, only to look away when we finally find the answer.

~farah

[farahquotes]

I have always believed that the people who say, “I don’t care,” are often the ones who care the most. Not because they are dishonest, but because caring is vulnerable. It is easier to act indifferent than to admit that something, or someone, has the power to affect us. Yet beneath all our masks and defenses, I think we all care more than we are willing to admit. We care about ourselves. We care about the people we love. We care about being seen, valued, respected, and understood. We care about things both big and small, even when we convince ourselves otherwise. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

I wish I was a pet in my house. My mother would baby-talk to me instead of raising her voice. She would never look at me with disappointment. I would not have to measure every word before speaking or live in fear. She would love me simply because I exist. Everyone would adore me. No one would expect perfection from me. I would not have to constantly prove that I am worthy of being here. And the strangest part is that I would not even need to speak. I would be fed when I am hungry, held when I seek comfort, bathed, cared for, taken on walks, hugged, kissed, cherished. My silence would not be misunderstood. My existence alone would be enough to deserve affection. Oh, how heartbreaking. How strange that it feels easier to imagine being loved as a pet than as a daughter in my own home. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

I’ve never considered taking my life. But I want it to end on its own. There’s nothing about it that excites me. There’s no spark, no drive, just an overwhelming desire for it all to end quietly. While others think about longevity, I’m drawn to the idea of an early ending. Life feels more like something I’m enduring rather than experiencing. Living feels like a curse, a relentless cycle that drains every ounce of energy. I’ve become detached from the world around me. People feel distant, life feels hollow, and everything seems like a monotonous passage of time. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

I am into sunsets and sunrises. I like pretty skies and twinkling stars. I stare at the moon all night. I am into books with amazing plots. I like to walk when it’s windy outside. I could stare at flowers all day long. But most of all, I’m into you - your pretty smile and deep hazel-colored eyes. I could stare at your face all the time. I like the mole near your nose, your long eyelashes, and your lame jokes. I like when you listen to my stupid worries. I love each and every part of you. I love the you who is in love with me. I love the you who is kind to me. You are my book-worthy love story.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

I struggle to hate people completely. Because even when someone breaks my heart, a part of me still wonders what broke theirs first.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

I feel there is no amount of love capable of healing me. I am just a sad soul. I find sadness in everything. I am so consumed by self-pity that no amount of love can soften it. I have made a pact with the idea of being unlovable. It has settled deep into my being. So even when I am loved, I still grieve for some other kind of love. Maybe that is what I am at my core - grief. And perhaps that will never change.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

How long can you go without talking? I can go for weeks, or months, or years. I have never been a person of talking. I would rather be silent than speak. Sometimes I stay quiet for so long that I start talking to myself, just to hear my own voice, just to make sure I haven’t lost it.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

Love was never quiet in my house. It was loud and devastating and impossible to hold without bleeding. And sometimes I hear my mother in me. In the way I break things when I feel too much. In the way I push people away before they can leave on their own. In the way I take back every soft thing I say because being loving for too long makes me feel exposed, weak, ashamed. I spent so much of my life promising myself I would become different. Softer. Kinder. Easier to love. But no matter how hard I try, there are days I feel her living inside me like an old wound stitched into my bones. And it terrifies me. The thought that maybe pain is inherited. Maybe some people do not pass down jewelry or recipes or family heirlooms. Maybe they pass down rage. Maybe they pass down the inability to love without destruction attached to it. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

Love was never quiet in my house. It was loud and devastating, impossible to hold without bleeding. So I love like that. In the way I break things when I feel too much. In the way I push people away before they can leave on their own. In the way I take back every soft thing I say, because being loving for too long makes me feel exposed, weak, ashamed. As if tenderness is something punishable. As if love is only real when it hurts.

[farahquotes]

I see myself hurting the people I love most, not because I want to, but because I do not know how to hold love without panicking under its weight. So I scream. Then I shatter. Then I sit alone among the ruins of what I ruined myself, wondering why love seems to come so naturally to everyone else while I carry it like a curse.

~ farah

[farahquotes]

Tell me you miss me, when no one is watching. Tell me you still look for me in crowds. Tell me your daughter has my eyes, and it scares you. Tell me you never moved on. Tell me I am still the thought you push away every night. Tell me you regret leaving me on that cold road. Tell me you heard what became of me. That I froze in the place you abandoned me. And died the moment you walked away. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

I see people losing their parents, and I’m numb. I watch my mother cry, and I stay that way. It scares me sometimes, how the world can seem like it’s collapsing right in front of me, and yet I stand there, untouched. But I know I’m not empty. I was never really taught how to express pain. I learned how to hold it, to swallow it, to carry it quietly without letting it spill. So even when something inside me aches, even when it feels unbearable, I say nothing. And maybe that silence is what I’ve come to call numbness. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

That sudden urge to save someone you love. You see them crying, breaking, almost coming undone in front of you. Their pain is not quiet. It spills out in sharp words, in shaking breaths, in the way their whole body seems to give up at once. And something inside you fractures. Your heart does not just ache. It shatters, piece by piece, because you were never meant to watch them hurt like this. You move closer, not knowing what to say, not knowing what could ever be enough. Still, you try. You always try. Because all you want, more than anything, is to take it away. To gather their pain into your own chest, to carry it for them, to shield them from whatever is breaking them apart. But the cruelest part of love is this. Sometimes, no matter how much you love them, you cannot save them. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

I cannot sleep at night, not when I am alone. The moment I close my eyes, everything I buried rises. Failed dreams, dead people, half-burned relationships find their way back to me. My heart beats so loudly it feels like it might give me away, like something inside me is trying to escape. The silence is never silent, it is filled with voices I cannot turn off. I tell myself I am okay on my own, but nights like this make a liar out of me. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

Get me out of here. It’s not an order, just a plea. I feel something breaking quietly inside me. Come and find me. I have been here for far too long, long enough to forget what it feels like to be somewhere else. Long enough that the walls have learned my shape, that the darkness knows my name better than I do. I am not sure I remember how to leave anymore. So come now, before I disappear into this, before I become something that does not want to be saved. ~ farah

[farahquotes]

If I say it out loud, I fear it will eat me alive. I fear the words will sink their teeth into my chest and refuse to let go. They will echo inside my head until my ears go numb, until even silence feels loud. I imagine myself standing still, frozen by the sound of my own honesty, unable to move forward or back. So I keep it inside. I let it live in the quiet spaces, in the pauses between thoughts, in the ache I carry without explanation. I pretend not naming it keeps me safe. Maybe it does. Or maybe it just keeps me here, suspended between what I know and what I am brave enough to admit. Some answers don’t ask to be solved. They ask to be survived. ~ farah