- : F E D C O N N E C T : -

>FULL ACCESS LEVEL GRANTED: Launching: FEDCONNECT_INTRANET...

[fedconnect]

Well, the post-apocalypse malaise seems to have passed and I’m ready to go on living in this terrifying new world of chaos and violence : )

[fedconnect]

Getting out of this bloodsoaked prison would probably do me some good...

[fedconnect]

Maybe I could get a job through these guys...

[fedconnect]

Five Hot Jobs in a Post-Federation Galaxy

[fedconnect]

Oh schneeng, son! I know that sauce scientist!

[fedconnect]

I should text him to see if he’s still alive and can get me there.

[fedconnect]

He responded! I’m gonna have others to talk to! EEEEEEE!!!!!!!!

[fedconnect]

Alright, well, if anyone is alive and reading this, meet me at the Sauce Vault!!! G-42 OUT!

[fedconnect]

Ugh...I’d give anything to be back in my habitat, watching Property Clones reruns with a warm bowl of hu’aaaig. These ratlings just aren’t cutting it.

[fedconnect]

I shouldn’t complain though, the ratlings are gonna die off from the leaking radiation soon enough and then I’ll just have to start goin’ at the bodies…

[fedconnect]

I did read that the Gromflomite backbutt dangler is pretty nutritious, so that should keep me going for at least a little bit longer.

[fedconnect]

Maybe toast it over that open greasefire on the mindscraper level? Mmm

[fedconnect]

I could also just start asexually producing offspring and eating them, because these recipes seem pretty dang good.

[fedconnect]

How to Prepare Your Unborn Hatchlings

[fedconnect]

I should have seen this all coming, my psychic told me I’d live to see the end of the world AND I’d resort to cannibalism at some point in my life. I just laughed it off then, but now it’s uh...well, pretty real.

[fedconnect]

It’d be a little less boring around here, anyway.

[fedconnect]

Any of you hackers still reading this?