yah... it's time for my bi-annual AU drop. i've always been a fan of AUs where the mentor figure turns out to actually be the biological parent of their protège so this one was a long time coming, but uh... how are we feeling about a "shadowsan is carmen's biological father" AU? listen. here me out.
okay so basically, in this au, suhara and dexter are the same age and they're buddies. they're bros. they're besties. they're both two of the most promising young vile operatives, and they're both up for consideration for the open faculty seat. because of this, they've got a bit of a rivalry going on, but they're still friends.
well, one day suhara starts to realize that dexter is kind of just phoning shit in, and though he'd always been pretty come and go like a cat, he seems to never be around anymore—its like he doesn't even care about the faculty position anymore....well suhara puts two and two together and he approaches dexter like, "so. who is she?"
and dexter is like "oh hey, i thought you'd never catch on. you gotta meet her, okay? i think you'll really like her and i honestly need a wingman."
so suhara reluctantly allows for himself to be dragged to a bar where he's introduced to carlotta, dexter's newest friend. immediately he realizes three things:
carlotta and dexter are totally into eachother
dexter was right, he does like carlotta.
oh no. dexter was right...
so the the three of them form a close friendship, and suhara is still pretty much a huge piece of shit at this age, but he's at least trying to respect the fact that his friend is into this woman. besides, despite the fact that they're both dancing around the fact, it's super obvious that those two are meant for each other. and he can respect that. he can super totally respect that. besides, having a crush on a vile outsider is stupid and dumb and is only for idiots like dexter. it is NOT for idiots like suhara!!!
lol. so anyway, one day dexter gets pretty badly hurt on a job bc even the best can be caught lacking sometimes literally just look at his (canonical) daughter... so it's pretty touch and go and suhara is left wondering if his friend is even gonna survive. he realizes that carlotta, who dexter had been planning to go meet in the next couple days, is kind of just left in the dark abt what's going on. atp she knows that they're both into some shady shit, but they both make it a point to share as little as possible abt vile for her own safety. anyway, he's like "damn, well, she shouldn't be left to worry so i'll just meet up with her instead and let her know what's going on."
so like he tries vaguely explaining to her what happened, but she doesn't appreciate his general evasiveness so she eventually gets the full truth out of him and she's like "hey, wtf that's so messed up. you both need to stop doing that immediately."
and suhara is like "um. well. it's not that easy, you know?"
and carlotta is like "spare me the excuses sir, you're telling me he's lying somewhere in critical condition and it's 'not that easy?' what's so difficult about it! just quit! make him quit, suhara!"
and you know, suhara isn't psyched about this either—hes already having doubts about vile and carmen's not even on the picture yet... look at you go, suhara! really speed running that development—! he's just as worried about his friend as she is and now that he's talking about it with someone, he realizes that the uncertainty about his best friend's fate is actually getting to him... so he and carlotta are both in this emotionally vulnerable state and they've both had a couple drinks, and you know these conditions are perfect for making a silly little mistake!!! one thing leads to another, and oh shit, they hook up. immediate regret on both their parts, btw. carlotta is like "oh man, this can not happen again. you're my friend, but I'm not into you like that. you're not dexter." and suhara is like "yeah that's cool I get that... I think I might be a terrible person btw..."
fast forward a little bit, and dexter recovers and he realizes he's got to stop fucking around. he needs to confess his feelings to carlotta. he tells suhara about his plan and basically, this happens:
(yes i gave dexter a real name... dw about it...)
yeah, so they cutely beat each other's asses but then they make up because that is what bros do. anywho. carlotta and dexter end up getting together and everything is great and wonderful and going perfectly and oopsies daisies, carlotta is pregnant. suhara is like "wtf wtf wtf this is the worst thing that ever happened to me" whereas dexter is like "ykw this is great. it doesn't if it's mine or if it's yours...let's ditch these vile losers and then all three of us can raise the baby together #family"
okay well fast forward through the pregnancy and dexter is the one who's consistently there for carlotta whereas suhara is not. when baby carmen is born and they find out suhara is the father, he feels immense guilt bc dexter is a way better partner and father than he could ever be and it should have been him... he suggests naming the baby alejandra after dexter (alejandro). Carlotta is like "awesome. sounds good. so this means you're gonna pull your weight, right?"
and suhara is like "well, yes!" bc despite being a twenty-two year old shit head, he does love his new daughter #cute.
Dexter is like, "hey, that's great man. so you're gonna join me in defecting, right?"
and suhara, who is a coward is like, "uhhhhh hold on now...."
so like suhara's refusal to defect causes some tension and LOL dexter becomes the father who stepped up... he starts acting much in the same way that he acted in canon before attempting to leave vile, and the faculty, as per canon, takes notice. they decided the do away with him, and they choose to make suhara prove his loyalty to them over his best friend by sending him to kill dexter. suhara has no plans to actually do this, and he fully plans on like helping to fake Dexter's death.
so he shows up at Dexter's place and he explains the sitch, and Dexter is like "okay, wait. hang on. your plan is to help me fake my own death so I can disappear with carlotta?"
and suhara is like "uh, yeah. obviously I wouldn't kill you."
and Dexter is like "okay okay okay. cool cool cool. so uh. quick question. what about your daughter?"
"uhhhhh"
"jeez man, you're a real class act. you're telling me you won't even risk your own ass for your daughter???"
and suhara explains that ideally he'd defect too, but it's too late for that now....and maybe if they just give him a few years for the heat to die down he can fake his own death and disappear too. so they're going back and forth arguing when interpol shows up and canon events play out and suhara and carmen are kind of just looking at each other like 🧍♀️🧍♀️
he tries desperately to find carlotta so he can get carmen to safety and explain what happened to dexter, but they had been in the process of scrubbing any traces back to her and because suhara has been so in and out in their lives, they hadn't had the chance to update him on her whereabouts or methods of contacting her. and now dexter is dead. and suhara has the faculty breathing down his neck. and he can't find the mother to his child. cue mental break down.
so, inevitably he is forced to bring baby carmen back to the island where he then lies about her paternity to protect himself and carlotta. and he is forced to accept it as coach brunt renames his daughter some stupid shit right in front of him. and everything is terrible. rip dexter. rip suhara. rip carmen's chance at a normal(ish) life.
i like to imagine that his relationship towards black sheep stays mostly the same as she's growing up due to his guilt and his piss poor ability to handle his feelings appropriately. though, in her early early childhood maybe he's more involved in her life and he grows distant as she grows up. and though they're distant, he's less mean to her and maybe they do have the occasional moment of closeness. every now and then he sometimes slips and calls her alejandra. so when black sheep runs away and takes up the name carmen, she also gives herself a middle name... LMFAO and then fast forward to the deep dive caper where she finds out allllllll these scandalous details and she discovers that not only is shadowsan her father, but she's literally been using her real name all these years without even realizing it.
thank you for reading my dissertation. I hope it pleases the PhD board or whatever I don't know how PhD candidates are selected I only have my bachelor's degree
Carmen Sandiego Crack AU I'm throwing out there for anyone who wants it where canon happens mostly the same, with the addition of two (2!) things:
Player is kidnapped by Dark!Carmen and made into a VILE operative.
Crackle and Dark!Carmen start dating during the Dark Red Arc.
Crackle and Carmen are wholly dysfunctional - brainwashing doesn't make for healthy romantic relationships, whether or not you wanted it to happen to her in the first place - and constantly arguing. After hours of screaming matches between the two of them, they finally come up with a way to fix their arguments: Just get themselves an impartial third party to help resolve disagreements!
Player is not as thrilled with the idea as they are.
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