ok i really just need to talk this out with the universe/the internet/the void.
so things at work are...... not great. as iāve said, at this point iām just gonna let sleeping dogs lay bc everything is already so fucked up between us. i feel like at this point, saying ANYTHING including sorry would probably make things worse
and like i underestimated how bad it was, i guess.
he refuses to be like even within 3 feet of me. doesnāt say a word to me or even look at me. basically pretends iām not even there. which whatever fine.
iād been lucky enough that i started thinking it was on purpose that i hadnāt been in a yard with him, aside from like saturdays which are different anyways bc thereās a third person in the afternoon, usually.
but yesterday i drew the short straw or something bc we ended up in a yard together. the yard thatās usually out the longest.
it was as awful as youād expect. we stayed on opposite sides of the yard far away from each other. the most he said to me was when he told me in the hallway we were going back out to the yard.
later, i had to pee but also i needed to get a lil more high to deal with that hell, so i had someone stand in. but i guess i took too long or whatever bc by the time i got back, we were inside and helping kitchen/checking/etc. which i normally hate, but fine. i like the supervisor who was in there.
i got stuck doing dishes for like 2 hours and was getting irritated and like tbh im not surprised no one helped bc he would rather shoot himself in the foot than be that close to me and everyone else just sucks. no one wants to do dishes. i hate doing dishes. but i did it anyways.
i like always end up being the last pack person to leave bc im always helping kitchen which gets so irritated bc like iāve been there all goddamn day. i would like to leave on time.
iām just so overly irritated in general but like especially with him and i donāt EVER want to be in a yard with him and only him unless absolutely necessary bc i canāt deal with it. i canāt deal with having no one to talk to or just being with someone who refuses to be anywhere near you.
iām willing to at least pretend to be civil and whatever, but he would rather just pretend iām not there. if thatās what you want, fine.
you deal with it how you want, and iāll deal with it how i want.
all of this is so fkn stupid and a good example of
a: why you shouldnāt date a coworker and
b: why no one should date me
