There's recently been some venting and discussion about butch stereotyping among lesbians I know, so let's bring up some things we should all keep in mind within our community.
Here's a reminder that gnc lesbians, butches and masculine women in general are not men or like men.
Masculine women and butches are not automatically tops, more experienced, or into using strap. Our style or gender presentation is not an indicator of sexual preferences.
Masculine women and butches are not automatically dominant either. Projecting your sexual fantasies on us is at best unfair, and straight up sexual harrassment at worst.
Sexualizing masculine women is not a compliment. Masculine style is not an invitation to receive sexual comments from strangers, no matter their sex or whether or not they are also a part of the LGBT community. We don't exist to "step on you" or whatever is the cliche of the month. This is just another side of the "predatory butch" stereotype, born of the same oversexualised image.
Butches and masculine women don't exists for your entertainment. We are not saviors, shields, or knights, we are real people with our own lives and personalities outside the myths and ideals pushed upon us. Even the ideals, while positive and what many strive for, are not all we are. No one can be a knight in shining armor all the time, and definitely not a sacrificial shield. Being constantly put up on a pedestal is very tiring in the long run. We need support and comfort too.
Masculine women are just as wholly women as feminine ones. Femininity is not some innate essence that "real women" posses, perform and like. Not fitting into the feminine role or disliking the style doesn't lessen our womanhood or make us men.
All women, regardless of our personal style and presentation, deserve to be treated with equal respect and humanity. We deserve to be seen as individuals and whole human beings, not as stereotypes or ideals. We want to be seen and heard and understood, because that's how real human connection works.
When others don't see you from their own preconstructed ideas, you don't feel seen or loved. You can't truly know or connect with someone if you've already decided who they are either.
Yes, we are handsome and strong and cool and sexual. But we are also happy, excited, giddy, silly, soft, funny and cute. We are also sad, lonely, stressed, boring, angry, tired and weak.
We are complex. We are vulnerable. We are just human.
