@allsadnshit - Tumblr Blog

I think I am a fundamentally lonely person just from my original circumstance and sometimes I don't like the idea of changing that in order to be happy I feel like I'd like to just be kinder to myself about it

The urge to be calling standardizing our existence healthy is so weird to me the older I get, people are all so different even though we are all so connected

My year of looking inward fr

Craving new love is like yes let me be who I am now without the confines of the past

Craving old love is like I want to feel secure and known for my errors and past and worst sides but still wanted and cherished

And I feel like I learn a lot about people by who they surround themselves with most

Allowing myself to be known is hard

I can sense I am assuming the worst and have entered a self defensive mode that leaves no room for love and understanding so I have to change but I won't be able to without softening

I am so looking forward to analog revival! Everyone is making physical items again! Hurray!

Everything is improved with good quality mustard

I am always surprised by the "help me but also FUCK YOU" method of asking for things from the community that is so popular in the last few years

I can't imagine that claiming that strangers you want money from basically owe it to you is effective in raising the support that's needed

Maybe I was just raised with the "you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar" belief system but it seems to me that if you want people to give their care and resources freely that you would be making it harder for yourself if you in the same breath said I hate you you pieces of shit

Not sure when this became the normal narrative when looking for compassion from strangers

Basically yeah

#self

I need to enter my live and let live era STAT

One thing at a time reminder!

The part of my cycle where I'm just nauseas lmao damn

Everything is activated right now

One of the reasons I feel solid in my reflections on coffee shop etiquette is that I feel just as harsh about my standards for baristas as I do for customers and how they act and I am fair to both sides of the interaction. You're a dick if you don't bus your table when there is a specified place to put your dishes. But - you're also a dick if you are careless about the quality of the drink you put out and I don't feel bad for you if a customer wants to send it back and ask to have it made again. Yes I think you should tip, no I don't think you need to tip $5 to make up for whatever wage a place you don't run is offering. Not remembering to clarify the details of your order and getting the wrong drink is your own fault for not being clear. And if you can't remember if you made the drink using the right milk you should always offer to remake it to be sure not to make someone sick.

I feel like my time on and off bar has helped me understand both perspectives a lot better and is part of the reason I am glad I have had some space from service work where it's so easy to get into a "the customers always wrong" shitty mentality so many shops breed amongst the staff

But I am also glad I spent 13 years on bar and realizing how to give good service but also stand up for yourself when the customer is wrong because them paying $7 for a drink doesn't give them the right to talk or act any type of way they want

Uniform color palette strikes my soul

#personal

In two's

#personal

People who consider themselves "fans" of something and expect recognition and thanks from the artist or person creep me out so much, I feel like enjoying what someone else makes doesn't require reward of any kind, I am honestly extremely grossed out by how entitled groups can be.

I feel like the harassment industry to industry looks different but the core is "you owe me something for supporting what you do" rather than "thank you for bringing what you do into the world" and I think that's because people have started to believe consuming is a skill that deserves recognition which is sad and weird

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