Rest In Peace, Mel Baggs <3
I didn’t know Mel Baggs well, just through tumblr posts, and then hir contributing to the first issue of my Autistic compilation zine (started on tumblr in #actuallyautistic), No Missing Pieces Zine. Partly since I love hir poem, and partly because sie wrote a great, fairly extensive contributor bio to go along with it, I thought I would share the poem sie contributed in hopes y’all will love it as much as I do.
Rest in peace, Mel. You are so very missed. Thank you so much for everything. <3 <3 <3
If you reblog this, please leave this post in tact out of respect for Mel and to credit the zine sie was a part of.
(Note - I’ve added periods to break up hir contribution a bit on here & break it away from the rest of the post for accessibility & to have it stand out more. Otherwise, no edits.)
Contributor Bio: Mel Baggs is 34 years old. Sie was born in the redwoods of California, grew up in San Jose, lived in the redwoods again as an adult, and moved to Vermont in 2005, where sie currently lives. Hir biggest hobby is crocheting, and sie always has several projects going on at once. Sie has been involved with the autistic community since sie was almost 18 years old, and has seen a lot of history and changes even over that short period of time. Sie has also been involved in other aspects of the disability rights movement: The psychiatric survivor/consumer/ex-patient movement, the mainstream (mostly physical) disability rights movement, and the developmental disability self-advocacy movement. Sie is not one of those people who is always finding a movement or community and feeling as if sie has come home for the first time. But if sie had to pick one of these movements, sie would pick the developmental disability self-advocacy movement. Sie has been in the developmental disability service system hir entire adult life, due to severe problems with daily living skills. This may make hir more emotionally connected to the experiences of people in general with developmental disabilities, rather than autism in particular. Sie has a number of disabilities and chronic health issues that make hir more aware of autism as it fits into a broader concept of the landscape of disability, rather than being a unique condition that is different from disability somehow. Sie also loves cats, and lives with an elderly and amazing cat named Fey. Hir experiences as an autistic person, particularly hir perceptual differences from the norm, are highly meaningful to hir and sie would not change them even if it meant sie would be more ‘independent’.
Sie has a poetry blog at: http://ameliabaggs.wordpress.com/
Sie also has a blog at: http://ballastexistenz.wordpress.com/
Hir tumblr is: http://withasmoothroundstone.tumblr.com/
In 2000, a group of autism parents decided to hold a rally in Washington D.C. to “raise awareness” for an autism cure. They did not consult with autistic adults anytime during the process. They did collect as many pictures of autistic children as they could, to show how many of us existed. And worst of all, they called the rally “Hear Their Silence,” the message being that only parents could talk about autism, autistic people were silent and only fit to be present as silent faces on posters. The following poem is my response to the title of their rally:
You Can’t Hear My Silence
They told the world to hear our silence
Hear the silence of the mute autistic people
Who will never have a voice of any kind
Presumed, by them, to be all of us
Or all of us who matter
And they, of course, would speak for us
All of us
At all
I wish they could hear silence
I wish they could listen to silence until they heard it
Silence is
The gap between your words
Silence is
The void between you and me
Silence is
The place where everything begins
Silence is
The place where the universe hides
Silence is
Everything there is, and nothing
Silence is
Where I’d rather be
Silence is
Where you’ll find all of me that matters
But you’ll never hear my silence
Because you don’t know how to listen
To things you can’t hear