꩜

it’s happening again.

[fifiisrotting]

hellooo i’m sophie / fi!! ₊˚✧ ﾟ. ✮

about me ☆ﾟ.

i use this as my rant page or place to talk about my current interests

last active april ‘23

they/them, minor, infp sagittarius

tw… mention of ED

[fifiisrotting]

i hate when ppl who are obviously wayyy smaller than me call themselves huge like yes you’re allowed to be insecure but saying that around someone who’s obviously bigger than you.. SHUT THE ACTUAL FUCK UP YOU MAKE ME SO ANGRY

[fifiisrotting]

me when i made myself throw up for the first time since 5th grade the other day :p

[fifiisrotting]

when my gf isn’t at school today and my clothes feel uncomfortable and the people who i don’t want to talk to are trying to start conversation and i want yo go home and to crawl out of my skin

[fifiisrotting]

i’m so hungry but i can’t eat

[fifiisrotting]

4•10•23

blehh i fucking hate school lunch, i hate being around my friends while they eat. it makes me feel sick

[honeypleasejustkillme]

i am unwell and not in the quirky cute and gentle crying way, in the hitting head and sobbing type way

[fifiisrotting]

i’ve been doing so good with restrictive eating the past few days but i get home and realize my grandma restocked on groceries. i’m going to end up binging i hate this

[mscherrycola]

the feminine urge to completely destroy your health for beauty standards

[fifiisrotting]

recently things have been so much harder with my self image. i keep looking at picture of me from december and i miss how i looked then. i had just gotten out of a not so good relationship so i was failing to to eat a healthy amount and i obsessed over my appearance to try and make my ex “miss me”. now while being in a healthy relationship i feel safe enough to eat again but my self image is plummeting. i know it’s bad but i want that me back. current me disgusts me.

[fifiisrotting]

why can’t i throw up

[spooky-systems-deactivated20230]

I wish I could explain to people that I can literally FEEL my identity disturbance sometimes. It feels like being empty and questioning who you are and wondering if you’re even “a person” or just a human being floating through space. It feels like wrapping your entire identity around a few things and not knowing who you “would be” without them, or not having any of those things at all. It feels like who am I? Do I have a name? Am I me? Who is me? It’s a whole ass physical emotion like “sad” and “happy”. Like it just hits you and you’re just left sitting there staring at a screen or into the darkness wondering who you are.

[fifiisrotting]

i feel sick when i don’t eat but even more sick when i do

[fifiisrotting]

i <3 my gf

[fifiisrotting]

the thought and idea of throwing up after every meal is starting to grow more

[fifiisrotting]

how were you just in my arms a week ago but now we can barely even speak a word to each other.

[fifiisrotting]

school ID picture is going to fr be the reason for my relapse😵‍💫