anrose

idk either. maybe i'm just here for the sad shits, i think?

[findinghil-blog]

a daily reminder

☀️ i don’t know who needs to hear this: you’re loved and cared for. your hard works will be worth it. cheer up, dear. you still have a lot to show off to this world. keep on fighting! 🌻 remember why you started to take this path. hold onto that hope. never give up your dreams for a temporary hardship. be brave and fight well. 🌙 there are times where you feel helpless, empty and worthless. feel what you need to feel. absorb everything and breathe it out. take a break, more like a rest, for a while. don’t push yourself too much. success doesn’t happen overnight. take it easy. ✨ and if you ever find yourself doubting your own worth and strength.. remember that you wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for your own bravery. keep that faith in you.

[findinghil-blog]

self

I am not in my usual self lately. I don’t know why. I want to isolate myself for the mean time. I’m sorry.

[findinghil-blog]

[therewasholyground]

“In 10 years you’ll be 28, what do you think you’ll be doing” 

It’s wonderful to see you’ve stayed true to yourself Taylor, happy birthday

@taylorswift @taylornation

[taylorswift]

I love you guys so much. Thank you for making this, what an amazing way to start my birthday. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[findinghil-blog]

Numbness from the inside out.

— How I feel. (via @anwrotes)

[findinghil-blog]

The red paint. The black circle. The purple splashes.

[findinghil-blog]

It's not about who got her first. It's about who stayed and ended up with her despite of her flaws and imperfections.

— The Best. (via @findinghil)

[findinghil-blog]

"You love her because you need her or you need her because you love her?"

— The Question. (via @findinghil)

[timbllr]

via weheartit

[findinghil-blog]

"Do it."

[findinghil-blog]

Sleep.

I used to tell my mom that I'm tired and I want to sleep already because of exhaustion from playing too much. I used to tell my dad that I want to sleep already because I want him to carry me to my bed. I used to tell my first best friend that I want to sleep so that I could spend the night in his house and never leave his side. I used to tell my teacher that I want to sleep because I'm getting weary of listening to the discussion. I used to tell everyone else that I want to sleep because I want to rest and regain my strength again, but now I only tell it to myself because I know they won't accept the reason why I want to sleep this time. I want to sleep for eternity because I'm tired of feeling this agony and I don't want to regain my strength anymore. I just want to lay my back, close my eyes and let the darkness consume me eternally. I used to have a reason to get up from my sleep, now all I ever wanted is to sleep and never get up alive again.

[findinghil-blog]

I laugh.

I joke.

I smile.

but deep inside,

I hurt.

I cry.

I wish I'd just die.

— Truth about me. (via @findinghil)

[findinghil-blog]

Goodbyes are temporary utterance in this world full of impermanence. 

[findinghil-blog]

Trust.

Am I really ready to fight again? To fight for someone who once broke my armor? The armor that I built to protect us—him, against the enemy. I guess wearing an armor does not mean I'm completely safe. The enemy still defeated me; broke me. For he knows me well—how I built that armor and how I planned all my strategies—I told him all about it. The enemy was him. It was frustrating how I've been protecting myself from no one—how I've been giving my trust to the one who'd only bring pain to me, after all that I've sacrificed for him.

[findinghil-blog]

Just as when I thought I finally found my refuge, all of a sudden my heart sank and everything was falling apart. I couldn't help but to think, "I was doing better" yet I heard a question in my mind, like song that I can't get rid of. Over and over it said, "were you? were you doing enough? were you? were you ever enough?" Just as when I thought I finally found all my missing pieces—was about to put them all back together, a sudden storm came and washed away the pieces and they all scattered to different directions. Again, I lost them, "I won't ever be complete again" I thought. As I sat, weeping, I only found myself asking, "was it really worth it? was it really worth dying to find my own worth?" I closed my eyes, hoping I'd never see the light again—and I never did. All I could see is darkness even if it's a bright day outside. I've embraced it, the darkness. I've come to realize that I'll never see rays of light, never again. Consumed by the darkness, I say, "It wasn't worth it. I wasn't."

— Lost worth. (via @findinghil)

[biteinthenight]

[cats-on-cocaine]