the kids tease you by calling enjin and you mom & dad.
The first time it happened you almost hurled your jinki across the, now empty, battlefield.
Riyo stood in front of you and Enjin with her arms behind her back. Girl was covered in dirt and fresh scrapes after nearly getting herself crushed during a cleanup mission. You were pissed. And concerned.
“You can’t just rush ahead because you think you saw movement,” you snapped. “What if that thing had gotten you?”
“And if you get hurt,” Enjin added with a sharp glare, “You slow the entire team down.”
Riyo nodded dramatically the entire time, eyes wide with fake sincerity. You wanted to shake her, because you’d be heartbroken if something serious happened to her. Until she opened her mouth tho.
“Yeah, yeah,” she sighed once the lecture ended. “I get it. I’ll keep it in mind, mom and dad.”
You both stared at her. Then stared at each other - a silent dialogue followed. Like you had the gesture conversations with the others, Enjin and you communicated differently.
‘did she really just said that?’ his eyes said.
‘yes. Oh my god.’
‘huh. Odd. But kinda funny.’
‘Enjin!’
‘okay, okay. Not funny.’
All while Riyo grinned watching the two of you. Enjin then turned away to let out a traitorous chuckle and you groaned.
Should’ve been the end of it, right? A funny one time joke. Unfortunately team akuta and their supporters was full of the worst people alive.
Because two days later you walked into the headquarters, carrying supplies as you hear Follo yell from across the hallway.
“Mom said we’re meeting at six, dumbass.”
You stopped dead in the tracks. “Excuse me?”
Zanka immediately pointed at Follo accusingly. “I told him not to call you that.”
“You kind of encouraged him,” Semiu said flatly as she walked by.
Riyo was wheezing in the corner while your eye twitched dangerously. “None of you are funny.”
“Mom’s scary today,” Rudo whispered.
Enjin walked in at the perfect moment (later you’re convinced he waited around the corner, because no one walked in at a more perfect time). “Dad’s here. Everyone behave.”
The entire room burst into laughter. You wanted to die. You wanted to beat up Enjin who looked way too amused for someone who apparently didn’t find it funny.
“You’re enjoying this,” you accused.
“No idea what you mean,” he said, failing miserably to hide his grin.
Is anyone surprised that things only got worse, because Enjin started participating? No? Yeah. Exactly.
One afternoon Semiu sat behind her desk and lazily looked through a magazine while Enjin shuffled by. Then again. He huffed and puffed, all cow-eyed and pouting.
“Are you looking for your wife?” Semiu asked without looking up.
“My wife,” Enjin said loudly. “Took the day off.”
His voice sounded a tiny bit betrayed. How dare you to take the day off when it wasn’t his day off?
“Good for her,” Semiu replied.
“Yeah. My wife deserves that,” Enjin nodded.
Later Semiu told you about this conversation and you almost chuckled. Almost.
However. Bro Santa surprisingly suffered the most from it - mostly because he kept accidentally feeding into the joke.
But for starters. You were helping team child with some equipment. Also because you wanted to hang out with Dear Santa since you became similar to a motherly figure in his life.
It was a fun afternoon… until Enjin walked in. Took in the scene. Decided to open his loud mouth.
“Wow,” he sighed dramatically. “Couldn’t you at least wait until the divorce?”
Bro choked. “Divorce?!”
Team child looked between the two of you in horror.
“What’s wrong with you?” you asked in disbelief.
“You left me for the kids,” he said solemnly and then gestured towards bro. “And… Bro.”
“You’re insufferable.”
“And yet you stay.”
Bro looked genuinely stressed now. “Enjin, I never touched your wife, I swear. She’s just a good friend.”
“Hello?!”
“I know,” Enjin said all serious at the same time.
You kicked him in the shin and swore you still heard him cackle when you were back in your room. And, now all alone, you let out the tiniest amused snort. But it wasn’t funny, okay?
And if we already spill the truth a little here then we need to be completely honest. The dynamic actually fit.
You handled planning, schedules, injuries, and stopping everyone from killing themselves. Enjin handled morale, chaos control, and intimidation.
And together somehow you functioned exactly like exhausted parents managing a group of violent disaster children. And the team knew it.
“Mom, Rudo stole my chocolate bar.”
“Dad, Riyo threatened to shave off my eyebrows… again.”
“Can Mom stop glaring at me like that?”
“Dad said no, so I’m asking Mo.”
“… I never ask Mom anything again.”
Until then it wasn’t that bad. Or at least you thought it couldn’t get worse until you went on a mission together. Because if Enjin could do one thing then it was getting real loud when he was impressed.
A trash beasts twice your size charged towards your team. The force was enough to crack concrete and have the ground shaking. Before anyone else could React you slid underneath. Your jinki activated you drove it straight upward and took it down in one hit. The entire battlefield went silent for half a second.
“That’s my wife!”
Your horrified scream echoed immediately after. “Stop calling me that!”
Riyo nearly fell off her scissor laughing. Enjin shuffled closer, grinning proudly as he helped you up.
Meanwhile Gris looked emotional. “They’re so in love.”
“We are not—”
Enjin showed you off proudly. “Did you see that move?”
“Oh my god.”
He looked genuinely delighted which honestly made it worse. While the whole nickname saga was a joke - at least you thought so - Enjin’s pride about your growth and strength was honest.
And then it happened. You weren’t ready. It was the cherry on top. Corvus, the big boss, decided to join in.
That was the moment you realized there was no escape.
You sat in headquarters one evening with your head resting against the table, exhausted after a fourteen hour mission. Corvus approached you as calmly as ever.
“Have you seen Enjin?” he asked.
Hope blossomed in your chest as you looked up. When was the last time you’ve heard Enjin’s name? And not dad or husband?
Then he casually added, “Your better half, I mean.”
Slowly you closed your eyes. A migraine threatened to grow and take you out right here, right now.
“Please,” you whispered. “Not you too.”
Corvus actually smiled. And because Enjin had the perfect timing injected in his veins he had just walked by, listened and now laughed loudly.
Your head snapped around and yeah, Enjin was smug as hell. But beyond it he genuinely looked happy and proud.
Sighing you hid a smile behind your hand. “Come over. After the mission we deserve a drink… husband.”
Enjin stopped dead in the tracks. Also Corvus looked surprised before he gave you two some space.
“You did just—fuck,” he chuckled and sat down beside you.
Ha! Finally it was you taking the upper hand. At least until he reached into his pocket and pulled something shiny out that left you speechless.
I'm predictable and baby- how would Sugimoto be with a small (like 5 foot SMALL) fem s/o who's a cuddle bug? Like holding hands when spooning, wanting to be the big spoon, burying face in his hair and neck, just loving the tender touch? Maybe also being a bully and blowing a raspberry against his neck when they're cuddly?
Trust me when i say he would be delighted to have a person like that as a partner. He is a very touch-starved man so every little sign of affection you give to him means the world to him. He would love to pick you up and have you cling to him like a koala as he goes on about doing his stuff (Don't worry, he is strong enough to carry you fot a while, no probs!).
He likes being the big spoon but loves when he is the lil' spoon. You look like a jetpack honestly, all small pressed against his back as one arm covers him, making him feel safe and loved like never before.
And he would absolutely forgive any "bullying" that you do to him, although he would like to make you feel a bit guilty by pouting like a baby, laughing it off when you apologize.
All in all he is pretty affectionate just like you, and the only reason you are not always stuck together it's either because you are on a fight with enemies or someone told you to 'get a room' and the two of you got embarrassed lol
Omgggggg you write for GK I'm so happy I found you!!! Can I ask for HCs of Ogata, Vasily, and Sugimoto with a fem!s/o who's super smart and always somehow helps them through predicaments even if she isn't a trained fighter? Maybe a good strategist or very knowledgeable, open-minded and kind person...Thank you! 😌🙏🙏
Ogata:
-Tbh he will still kinda look down on you because you are weak. Not that he is the strongest person ever now, is he?
-Still, he will be impressed at your knowledge and intelligence. He appreciates it when you get everyone out of trouble with a clever plan.
-Your kindness though... is off-putting. Don’t be kind to him, he won’t be kind to you. At least that is his logic. When you two tag along on a mission together, you are basically the good cop and he is the bad cop.
-Sometimes he will bluntly tell you to stop being so cocky when you are simply explaining something to someone, just for the kicks. “You should wash your face now, you got a bit of snob on it.” and then proceeds to give you a shit-eating grin when you glare at him.
Vasily:
-Greatly appreciates your strategies. He is often asking you for positioning in certain areas when he is unsure of where should he go.
-Always follows your plans. Always. He knows there is little chance to fail if he follows your lead.
-He is caught off-guard with your kindness. You barely know him (maybe even can’t understand him?) and you smile at him so softly and offer him food and company? That is something else.
-If you don’t speak russian, he will get very excited when you start learning words so you can speak to him. Usually you communicate via drawings, but being able to understand verbally makes him happy beyond words.
Sugimoto:
-He is amazed by your ‘big brains’ as he calls it. Honeslty he feels kind of stupid when you come out with a clever idea about a problem you were having. “Huh, how didn’t i think about that?”
-Be kind to him. Please keep being kind to him, lord knows he needs it. He wants to cry when you show him even the smallest act of kindness.
-If you are ok with it, he would like to speak about his problems and his thoughts with you, both as a way to let it all out and to hear what you think. Your open-mindedness is something he greatly appreciates in moments like that.
-Sometimes you want to facepalm because he won’t shut up about you being so smart. He will literally show you off to everyone everytime he gets the chance.
golden kamuy headcanons of annoying stuff they’d do as modern domestic partners 🙂🙂🙂 (or call it bad habits)
sugimoto: eats yo food out the fridge even when that motherfucker was labeled properly: “Y/N’s LUNCH!!”. when you come home from your outing ready to maul your leftovers, saichi is already inhaling the last bite, eyes glazed over from being fixed on the tv too long and cheeks chubby with food as he spits out a “baby you’re home!🥰” 🤬🤬
shiraishi: a combo of sugi and tsurumi only this bitch will always have the smoke alarm going off bc he’s lighting a blunt inside with the doors closed 🤦🏾♀️or he forgets his damn keys and constantly breaks window screens and knocks over photo frames trying to get back into the house 😩
tsurumi: walks around the house booty ass naked WITH the windows open!!! and knows no other way 😭🤌🏾🤌🏾 with the amount of times you’ve tried to console him about it, you start to think he might have a thing for voyeurism 🤭
ogata: although y’all are domestic this man would be so awful at quality time together (specifically with what doesn’t interest him) it’s almost depressing :/// “gata watch a movie with me!” “mm…nah 🥱” “can we play a board game today? 🥺” “those are fuckin dumb 🙄” but kiss his neck, put his hand on your thigh, or sit in his lap while you’re doing it and he’s suddenly incredibly invested 🙄🙄🤗
koito: lowkey is way too quiet and ignores everyone when y’all have company over. could give a damn about being social with others just wants to munch on good takeout and have you in his lap. fr stays on his phone drinking beers or does shit on the computer in another room the entire time. does NOT interact with others, only u cutie :’))
tanigaki genjiro: leaves his dirty clothes EVERYWHERREEE. like we’ll always love the way he looks naked 🥺🥺and he’ll even strip right after the gym and omg sweat glistening abs!! but his nasty ass is so bad at coming back to collect it afterward that you’re forced to pick his sweaty drawers off the floor lmao sorry hun at least that dick is A-1 🤩😚
tsukishima: lowkey can’t give u space but only bc he’s so in love n just wants to be close 🥺 if u boot him out he’ll have to find something else to obsess over for a while 😗he also has a habit of casually pulling up videos and pics of you he’s taken while you’re stretched out on the bed,,, no ones ever around tho!! expect for that one time your friend came in the kitchen to grab something while he was enjoying them a bit too much :’)
Completely self-indulgent headcanons of soft domestic Sugimoto Saichi
I was just thinking "i think he'd be really nice and warm to cuddle" and then i ended up coming up w an entire list of headcanons so take them
Also gender neutral reader
Sugimoto would let you borrow his clothes anytime. Literally just ask.
He's confused about it the first time like "are all your clothes dirty or something ?"
but if you ask enough it just becomes routine where he offers his coat and scarf to you when he's not wearing it
And if you keep saying yes each time, he just tosses his coat and scarf at you every time he changes. Like absentmindedly
Literally you'd be doing your own thing and you'd get pelted by it
Youre not complaining though
He starts to find your scent comforting too, but he cant borrow your clothes because they absolutely will not fit him as comfortably as they fit you, but he still likes to hold your sweater / jacket when youre not around
Also whenever you cook he'll always savour it, even if you don't think it's that good it'll still always put a smile on his face
But if anything he actually prefers to cook with you
He tries to learn all your favourite dishes and wants to make them with you
And of course you will end up eating his cooking too
Something something food tastes better when you share it with your loved ones
Sometimes when he cooks for / with you, you have no clue what youre about to put in your mouth
Cause he eventually started to mix recipes he learned from Asirpa with other recipes from around japan, and then started dabbling in cuisine across the world.
Half the time you dont even know what it is, just that it tastes good
Also if you fall asleep anywhere thats not a bed you will always ALWAYS without fail wake up on a bed comfortably under a blanket.
And if you have any favourite stuffed animals, guess what you'll be waking up to beside you
Sugimoto never brings it up, he's always just like "you seemed tired, did you rest well ?" as if you magically teleported to the bed yourself
ALSO SUGIMOTO SNUGGLE BUDDY !
he is very warm, after all the time he's spent in Hokkaido winters he's like a personal heater. Youll never be cold again
and if somehow youre still cold, he'll cuddle you under a blanket till youve warmed up.
But sometimes he gets so cozy holding you close that he just. Falls asleep.
But the heater (sugimoto) is getting too warm.
But he looks so comfortable and you wouldnt wanna move and wake him up, would you ?
So you just awkwardly kick the blanket off of you in hopes that youll cool down a little
This is a routine occurrence
Also sometimes he starfishes when he sleeps but literally you do not care even if it takes up the whole bed because it means ! Time for him to be a pillow !
he's always very careful not to cross your boundaries, to the point where you have to remind him that he doesnt have to be so tense.
He just wants to make sure youre always comfortable around him
he will always ALWAYS stand up for you
Whether he's standing up against a person or proving your own bad thoughts wrong
He really cares about you and wants to do anything in his power to make sure you're alright
I cannot stress enough how selfless this man is. Like it worries you sometimes, he'll always check in on you and make sure youre comfortable and fed and alright, and you always ask the same questions in return
And if hes ever not taking proper care of himself ? You always make sure to remind and help him with that
Sometimes he causally says a really concerning thing that happened in the past and you have to ask if he's okay
He's always really grateful of how much you care about him
Sugimoto doesnt always know what to say when you vent to him, but he's a good listener and will do whatever you ask to help you feel better
whether its cradling you in his arms, getting you tissues or water, or taking you somewhere quiet. he really cares and just wants to help
he'll always comfort you regarding your fears, whether its something big like fear of death or something smaller like a fear of bugs
he'll always try and support you when something scares or upsets you
and yes if you are socially anxious he will order things for you dont worry
Also, sometimes you wake up in the middle of the night to him twitching or talking in his sleep
You grew quite accustomed to being able to tell if its a normal dream or a nightmare
But if he's having a nightmare, youd know to wake him up, and youd always comfort and hold him till he manages to fall asleep again
Also sometimes you would cup his cheeks in your palms and admire him, but it took you by surprise the first time he did it back !
He found your flustered reaction cute and proceeded to continue doing it sometimes
Nose kisses ! Forehead kisses ! Cheek kisses !
Oh and he absolutely cannot help you with your homework but he provides moral support and is consistently in awe by how much you know, even if you dont feel like your knowledge is anything special
You also buy him hair conditioner.
Now his hair is soft and smells good.
He does not understand why youre obsessed with his hair after the conditioner until he makes you try it and now you are both obsessed with each others hair. Good work
That's all I have for now, huge props to my friend for letting me spam him with these ideas. If you're reading this, I hope you have a comfortable day and remember to relax your body if there's any stiffness
some fluffy saichi + food headcanons with gender neutral reader 🤷🏾♀️
sugimoto loves to see watch you while you demolish your favorite foods
he melts seeing the genuine sparkle of delight when you’re about to enjoy good food. the way your eyes widen, the smile that takes over your face, even the knit of serious concentration that forms between your brows; he loves it all.
saichi often wants to feed your food hypnotized lil face. “sugimoto it’s so yummy,”he’d make puppy eyes and coo at you as he brings the spoon closer to you “hinna hinna baby, keep eating” (“eat some sugi” he’d close his eyes n open up his mouth for a bite from you)
doesn’t tell you right away when you get crumbs or sauce on your face since he finds it innocently endearing
watch out though because he is not above stealing the last bite of something if it’s something he likes a lot! :(
sugi gets a kick out of watching you discover foods you don’t like too. he’ll cackle at you too till you’re shoving the nasty food in his mouth for payback (this kind of payback doesn’t always work out as sugi will actually eat anything and enjoy it so usually he just ends up laughing more 😭)
sugimoto who loves watching you cook with asirpa, and he actually will join you two with cooking.
sugimoto who will run to you and kiss you as he hugs you tightly after being apart from you for so long while hr kisses you, he will end up dipping you do low you fall into the snow.
sugimoto who will say the dumbest stuff just to piss you off.
sugimoto who likes to but will sleep naked with you if your in your own room/tent.
sugimoto who with shove his hat over your face so you dont see something too horrid ( kinda like a mother covering her kids eyes).
sugimoto who will sneak otter meat into your food (iykyk)
sugimoto who one time slipped of ice covered rock and instinctively grabbed onto you, and ended up dragging you down with him(you both fell into ice cold water).
sugimoto who likes brushing your hair it calms him.
sugimoto who you both make the same face when your both confused at least 2 times.
speaking of
you and sugimoto are like this (that would be a cute relationship headcanon wouldn't it?).
sugimoto who likes to carry you..like a lot he. doesn't care how big or small you are i mean we are talking about the immortal sugimoto.
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