@flmbynt asked : ❛ you know i’d be lost without you ❜ @kogami !
* CHAOS FORGED , INCARNATE OF FEROCITY . destined to ruins , laden by ash and the wreckage of a soul to be torn asunder . lungs exhaust from held breath and you blink : once , twice , thrice ( retinas burn by sentiment , it simmers in place of an abyss you accustomed yourself to ) . how long had it been , since someone looked at you and not the chaos that stained your once gilded veins ? I WAS A BEAST IN MOURNING , buried deep within the flesh of a man blackened with a curse . the harrow of war was far out of reach when you were beside yourself with his radiance that could smolder all to dust and you choke on the words long left unsaid , “ TENGEN . . . ” like a prayer , it tastes too divine on your acrid tongue and you swallow the sins that burned in the marrow of your sinful bones .
a gruesome crypt of sinews and skin , devastation the foundation of your roots yet , HE DOES NOT LOOK FROM YOU , he does not loathe the breath you draw or the blood that soiled the pads of every finger ( unfathomable , this pillar that upheld the universe and i yearn and hunger and ache for his benevolence / his light / his billows and blooms / anything he could offer ) .
you keep the memories of the dead nestled between THE FOURTH AND FIFTH RIB , an infernal blaze that stirred the prophetic dregs of organs suffused with the haunt of every ghost you knew by name but he silences the stirring storm , the encroaching nightmare of your fragmented reality and HIS PRESENCE IS A MERCY THAT SILENCE IS NOT . he is brash with a saccharine gaze and you were deafening misery befouled by a demonic lull ( i do not deserve his peace and struggle ‘neath it and it’s empyrean beckoning ) . “ haaa . . . didn’t take long to lower your standards for company , ” there is no humor in STRAINED SATIRE and your palms grasp for the sanctuary of your pockets , for something that would lessen the urge for you to take him within your anathematized grasp and never let go .
if i am sacrilegious on hallowed grounds , then you are the salvation that extinguishes the embers of my cataclysmic shadows .
his heart was afire with divine retribution and yours was smoldering in the cinders of damnation ; I WOULD NAME YOU THE SUN a phosphorescent incarnate , embodied by the dawn and its beginnings ( the start of something new / of something beautiful / of something you could not touch ) . the outpourings of your soul catch in your throat , the strings of your vocal chords worn raw by significance . i was something selfish , SOMETHING CRUEL AND UGLY for a desire that cleaved my forbearance ; torn asunder by mortality and morality . you should know better by now , to turn your back to what would end in devastation / for you , for him , for anyone . but still , you foolishly CLING TO HUMANITY that had long since been extinguished from your ossein , to hope that you were not beyond their reach .
“ you’re too strong to be troubled without me , ” stronger than the crust of this despondent earth / stronger than any of us ; YOUR LONGING ISN’T LEISURE OR WITHOUT PRECEDENCE , your nails rending the flesh of your palms with constraint . deterrence is without triumph , threads of your essence vulnerable to scrutiny as you relent ‘neath predilection and a smile dimples your pallid cheek with luster and your covetous ache defies you once more as you helplessly outreach , squeezing the breadth of his shoulder with reassurance : DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY THAT I’LL STAY ? finally , your posture straightens and you lean , resting your temple 'pon his frame in place of your grasp , dark lashes eclipsing slate woe ( or was it contentment that ravaged you now ? ) “ don’t worry about that , alright ? ”
don’t go where i can’t follow , tengen i’m lost without you , too .
@flmbynt . / shadow & bone . / still accepting .