I've self diagnosed with PTSD. Currently learning how to navigate that while learning how to love myself.
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I've self diagnosed with PTSD. Currently learning how to navigate that while learning how to love myself.
I have not only gotten love and patience from this person, but I've gotten support that didn't make me feel dependent or crazy for needing it. I've had people who have had patience with me that I'm extremely grateful for but these are different. It's so refreshing to go to a house where I'm loved and welcomed. It feels great to have another mother figure hug me in the morning and be able to kiss who I'm staying with in front of them. It's so so so refreshing and I feel like I'm talking a gulp of fresh water when I'm with them. I don't feel less than but I also feel checked and recognized. I missed that feeling.
Soooooo
This is my new favorite thing. If ya live in the Bay Area n wanna get jiggy, come thruuuu
“I’ve sold thousands of pieces of latex in my life and I’m a doyen of the fetish scene. I love to get people from ‘here’ to ‘there.’ ‘Here’ is having a fetish and hiding it. ‘There’ is exploring it. Trust me, your dark secret is nothing I haven’t heard before. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s just what you’re into. And there’s plenty of other people who are into the same thing. You should never feel shame. Unless of course shame gets you off.”
I feel so good. I obviously wish things were different but I can't help to still feel happy. Ever since I started my anti-depressants and anxiety meds, I feel okay. I feel less miserable. I don't hate my body as much. It's not as hard waking up now. My body feels nice. My mind feels nice. I wish I had someone but I understand why I don't. I need to be better. Actions speak louder than words so giving them space is best but I wish with all my heart they come back.... eventually.
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You’ll meet her, she’s very pretty, even though sometimes she’s sad for many days at a time. You’ll see, when she smiles, you’ll love her.
Pan’s Labyrinth, Dir. Guillermo del Toro (via wordsnquotes)
EXCITING NEWS I JUST GOT PUBLISHED IN UC BERKELEY’S NEWSPAPER. I wrote a piece about how love revolutionized who I am and how it changed the way I saw myself. (That won third place in a writing competition!!!!)
Anyway, I’m fucking stoked about it because I was ALWAYS insecure about my writing. I wouldn’t let my girlfriend read my essays for class because I was never too good at it. This is why this is such a milestone for me. I just got fucking published y'all, wow. Also, I’m really happy my first time being published was about me being trans and all. It’s a good way of coming out to people and having an experience so beautiful like this.
Here it is if y'all wanna read it!!! Heheheh
http://www.dailycal.org/2017/07/17/queer-love/
Our mother always taught us to be in control of our voice and our bodies and our work, and she showed us that through her example.
this was fall 2016. Me and my best friends would make YouTube videos and they were so funny and wholesome. Maggie moved out so it's just me and dan now. Maybe I'll post some parts of the video that we made here.
omg so i really came out to all of instagram about being trans?? lol thats really cool and im kind of proud of myself because people i didnt even think would reach out to me, did! i have a packer now and i just bought a binder so im really excited to feel good about my body. maybe in a couple years ill start T but i dont think so. i love having an androgynous look and im really excited yet very scared of whats to come. hehehe.
maybe ill post a pic of me being comfortable with myself in a couple days <3!
Camping w/ the love of my life. 👅
the love of my life sending me cute ass picture while she's on her grad trip in Puerto Rico :( literally so in love. I will never get over her. Holy fucking shit. 😭👀💍