alfie buttle x female reader
warnings: accidental pregnancy, angst, heavy arguments, swearing, alcohol, emotional distress, crying, hurt/no comfort (mostly).
a/n: i keep saying i’m back and then disappear i swear. i wrote this one over a month ago and just discovered it in my drafts. this isn’t a series, i just left the ending open because i wanted you to decide what happens next. also, big up my girl sabina in this fic, she a real one. happy reading, hope it rips your heart out a little xx
one time, you decided to be reckless.
you and alfie had been together for nearly four years. and for all the length of your relationship you had been relying on the pull-out method. somehow, it had always worked. until it didn’t.
alfie was in america filming with the lads, the whole world cup tour, while you were back at your shared house in london. at around 3 a.m., unable to shake the feeling that something wasn’t right, you door dashed four pregnancy tests to the house after realising your period was late.
at first, you tried convincing yourself it was stress. then you checked your cycle.
your heart dropped to your stomach.
your most fertile days landed exactly on the week you and alfie had been having unprotected sex almost everyday before he flew out.
suddenly, your late period didn’t feel like a coincidence anymore.
when the tests arrived, you took all four.
every single one came back positive.
you just sat there on the bathroom floor, staring at the pink lines, completely numb.
the first person you called wasn’t alfie, it was sabina.
“..hello?”, her voice was thick with sleep.
you opened your mouth. nothing came out.
the moment she heard your voice she sat upright.
“can you come over? i’m scared..”, you spoke whilst trying to not cry.
“sure, yeah let me get dressed and i’ll be there. what happened?”
sabina didn’t ask any further questions, she just mumbled an “be there soon” and head out.
as she was driving to your place, she casually rang chip, not mentioning a single thing about what had happened. she just wanted to know where the boys were.
were they back at the hotel? still filming? already pissed drunk out their minds at a random bar in new york?
chip told her they were all getting ready to head to a club.
when she arrived, she gently told you that you needed to tell alfie.
you didn’t want to. you didn’t want to ruin his trip and drop something this massive on him while he was thousands of miles away.
half an hour later, after staring at his contact for what felt like forever, you finally pressed call.
he answered almost straight away.
there was music blasting in the background, people shouting. he was clearly drunk, but the second he heard your voice, everything about him softened.
“you alright girl? what’s wrong?”
you hadn’t even realised how upset you sounded until he asked.
“talk to me. what’s happened?”
you tried saying the words a dozen different ways, but none of them came out. eventually, through tears, you whispered,
everything changed then. the silence lasted only a few seconds before his entire tone shifted.
he laughed once. not because it was funny, but because he couldn’t believe what he’d just heard.
“what the fuck d’you mean you’re pregnant?”
“you’ve completely fucked my head.”
you tried to explain, but he just kept cutting you off.
he started cussing you out like it was somehow your fault.
“fuck you man, why did you call me? you’ve proper ruined my trip.”
he kept saying he was in america, he couldn’t deal with this right now, and asked what exactly you expected him to do.
“right, so what the fuck do you want me to actually do reader?”
you were already terrified. you’d just found out you were carrying his baby. all you wanted was your boyfriend. instead you got someone who sounded like he didn’t even know who you were.
through tears, you kept tying to calm him down before he hung up.
“do whatever y’want. find a way to fix this shit.”
then the line went dead. you just stared at your phone.
sabina was right there, holding you was you completely fell apart.
“it’s okay sweetheart, he’s just drunk i promise he didn’t mean it.”
she kept telling you he was drunk, that he didn’t know what he was saying. that he loved you.
but those words were already carved deep somewhere inside your chest.
“find a way to fix this shit.”
eventually, you cried yourself to sleep with one hand resting over your stomach.
heartbroken, terrified, and carrying a baby you suddenly weren’t sure the father wanted.
the next morning in america, alfie woke up with the worst hangover of his life.
he looked at his phone and immediately saw a six minute phone call from you at 4 a.m.
something felt wrong, when he tried ringing you and your phone was off.
he quickly sent a message.
morning darling, are you awake?
please ring me when u wake up xx
he threw on a hoodie, and wandered into the airbnb, still trying to remember what the fuck had happened the night before.
he barely made it five steps before spotting chip leaning against the wall with a coffee in his hand.
he didnt even say good morning at alfie.
cause sabina called him last night.
she’d told him everything.
alfie let out a humourless laugh.
a silence settled between them.
“nothing man.” chip shrugged.
“..how much do you remember from last night?”
alfie frowned once again.
“bits. club, loads to drink… i think i spoke to reader at some point.”
“i definitely answered a call.”
he rubbed the back of his neck, trying to force his brain to work.
“she was cryin’.. why was she crying?”
alfie threw his hands up.
“i honestly can’t remember bro.”
“what did she say?”, chip pushed him.
“i don’t know,” alfie replied, firmer. “just tell me.”
“right, so you don’t remember shouting at her?”
“or telling her she ruined your trip?”
“not even telling her to fix it?”
“she rang you because she’d just found out. thank god sab was there.”
alfie looked at the ground confused, and flabbergasted.
then chip stepped closer,
“bro, you just might’ve threw away a four year relationship.”
alfie’s stomach lurched so violently he thought he was going to throw up.
he sat down on the couch with both his hands covering his face.
“fuck. i hung up on her..”
he let out a broken sound, something between a laugh and a sob.
“i’d fucking kill someone for speaking to her like that.”
“what if she thinks i don’t want our baby?”
chip didn’t sugar coat it.
“after that phone call? she probably does.”
alfie scrambled for his phone with shaking hands.
he could barely unlock it.
please don’t think i don’t want you
his thumb hovered over the keyboard again.
there wasn’t a single sentence in the english language that could undo what he’d said.
was get on the next flight home.
amandla
turnnoffyourmind
kianamaiart
