Turtle Bottom

~Some funny stuff and fandoms~

[dogpuppy]

[liquidpaperfoundation1]

My Very Punctual Wife Gets My Night Worm can also be used to remember the order of the planets in the solar system!

[cryptid-on-a-string]

Mercury Venus Pearth Wars Goopiter Maturn Nuranus Weptune

[thatguyvitor]

She maturn on my pearth til I goopiter

[batsandboba]

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know

[ruinedchildhood]

[newtonpermetersquare]

So that’s basically how it went down

[tricornking]

I resent just how fucking accurate this shitpost is, congratulations OP, you effectively illustrated how Darwin’s Theory of Natural Selection became accepted by the wider public using a FUCKING MUPPETS MEME, here is your A+, get the hell out of my office

[hamletmachine]

For my friend♡

[emil1863]

Day 7: Future | Free Day

Free day!!! Ace and Law because they look very cool

[tj-crochets]

My grandma just called and, among other things, said “You have hips. That’s good! Men like hips!” and then she interrupted herself to say “Women like hips. People of your preferred gender like hips. I can never remember”  And I was like “Thanks grandma! My preferred gender is none of them, no thanks.” and she was like “Okay, no one will comment on your hips!” very self satisfied, like “aha, I have figured it out” I think like half her grandkids are some variety of not-straight and she can’t always remember which is which but she is the epitome of like “she’s a little confused, but she’s got the spirit!”

[tj-crochets]

Update: I gave it some thought and my estimate was wrong. Of the grandkids that are out, it’s 1/3, not ½

[tj-crochets]

I told my grandma that I’d told my friends about what she said and that some of y’all had said you wished she was your grandma, and she said “Well, you can never have too many grandkids!”  So like…consider her your honorary grandma* I guess? *if you want an honorary grandma, that is

[tj-crochets]

Update on my grandma: I told her my hair was standing up, but instead of straight line it was diagonal and she said “That’s okay, you’ve never been straight!” and then laughed so hard at her own joke I thought she was going to drop the phone

[tj-crochets]

Happy almost pride month! Have my confused-but-supportive grandma!

[tj-crochets]

An update: my grandma just called me to ask if I knew it was pride month

[tj-crochets]

Happy pride month!!

[eggdrawsthings]

family portrait

Edit: sadly i was informed that the ref was an AI image i feel so cheated what the fuck man i hate it here o(-(

[thoughtportal]

general relativity for babies

[thelittleblackfox]

babies? Hell, I’m an adult this is the clearest and most understandable explaination I’ve ever seen. This book is for anyone

[motherfucker-somewhat-limited]

[catchymemes]

[puyopuyo]

things in this world that kick ass

1.

[koiagain]

I guess you could say he’s ve… he’s a very h…

[hottdoggblogg]

[the-big-mood]

Show your unwavering support for Costco’s iconic $1.50 hot dog combo. This shirt lets you wear your love for the unbeatable value proudly. Get it HERE!

[thebelchers]

Bob’s Burgers, Easy Com-mercial, Easy Go-mercial (S04E11)

[doubleca5t]

You know what, fuck you *banishes you to the late 90s music video dimension*

[marauders4evr]

It occurs to me that there are people who weren’t on this website in 2012 and therefore never saw the magical gif that you can actually hear:

It’s been over five years and that still impresses the hell out of me.