MY LIES
MY LIES!
When you wake up crying is when you know your not ok. Truth is I am not ok, I am not fine, I am not happy. But I tell everyone i am fine, I am ok, I am happy. Ill be ok, "wow I make alot of lie to cover up the feelings, emotions everything that goes throw my body, mind...lie lie cover up alot of me." my life is just made of lie. Lies is what I am. I am made out of lies. Made of lie is the best thing for me right now...because i am not trying or want to hurt everyone with my own saddness....or emotions. I dont wanna talk about my feelings, because i know ill make them worry, or hurt...so why tell when you can keep it inside you.
People say "if you got nothing to say that is postivit then keep it to yourself" Will I am...I am keeping it to myself because they dont have to know whats wrong, or whats going on inside of me.
I know whats going on...but no one does..truth is I am dying inside slowly but i wont tell no one...they will find out and they will talk and talk to me or try to talk to me saying that everything is going to be ok...everything is fine...your fine.....I honestly dont wanna hear anything from anyone or there judgemental thoughts of what I am doing...or do..or say... I got my own judgement thoughts for myself..i dont want hear it from others, or i dont wanna hear it anymore from anyone, i got my own thoughts about myself...and to be honest I hate the thoughts of me or what I think about myself..and my thoughts arent that pretty to be seen by anyone.
But life goes on. Let me keep living until I give up with my own life. Let me keep telling everyone i AM FINE let me tell them I AM HAPPY when I know I AM NOT happy or fine.
Welcome to the my world that is made out of lies.
Lies is my escape.