mon amour

“Fame means millions of people have the wrong idea of who you are.” 

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

i know it came as a surprise to everyone but if you're reading this. thank you for loving candy and uno so much. if anyone needs me you can reach me on discord and maybe on unoxxcandy here on tumblr. i hate saying goodbye so..

until we meet again. 

- bebe

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

taehyunfmd‌:

it’s pathetic, but he’s not sure what to say to her as he approaches slowly, how to crack the tension in the air. does he poke it or punch through it with a heavy hand?

taehyun’s never been a punchy person, and he’s never been good at conversation.

“your comeback seems to be doing well,” he tries with a false sense of confidence, eying the canned coffee in the vending machine to avoid hwayoung’s gaze.

Looking back to those days when Lipstick was struggling to gain the company's favor, Candy found herself hating the group. Even though it was undeserving of them but her dislike for the group remained the same over the years. She may have grown fond of the idea of being a member of Lipstick but since Goeun's departure, the group was once again shaken up thanks to her.

When Candy was younger, she made friends with her seniors, more than her fellow trainees. She even hoped that maybe she could be a member of BEE at some point. But one of those people she lost touch with was Taehyun. They used to be really close and friendly with each other but things have changed and change is inevitable in life. It’s either the person has changed or the circumstances have.

Candy was on her phone, scrolling away through the sea of comments on her Instagram especially after Goeun’s lawsuit being finalized and all. Taehyun was a good friend of Candy but she knew better than anyone that he had a softer spot for Goeun. She can’t blame him. He’s too fragile to function at times when Candy looks at him. She’s a hurricane compared to him but they used to get along so well.

She’s seen him through her peripheral vision already but she paid him no mind. It’s a Candy thing to do. She knows that if people want her attention or has something to say, they’d approach her first. A part of her wanted to say hi to him but a bigger part of her told her to stay put and so she does. Calmly looking at the comments till he had come closer and closer, then he speaks. She barely lifts her gaze at him. “You think so?” She asks. Trying her best to prolong the conversation rather than it ending with a one-word reply from her. Which other people get a lot. “We haven’t won anything.” Candy tells him, lifting her head and directing her complete attention on him.

“Do you want to drink some coffee? You need money for that. Staring at it won’t make the coffee come out from the machine, oppa.”

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

fmddrew‌:

“ I have seen you before, “ He finally openly admitted turning to place one arm against the rail nearby. “ it’s kind of hard to forget seeing someone like you around anyway, and I heard you like sports and martial arts. Is that true? “ He leaned in the best possible way to expose his own arm peeking from his rolled up sleeves. “ Maybe we should have a spar ourselves.” @fmdcandy​

Candy was intrigued by him, an eyebrow was raised at the male's direction. Of course, he had seen her before. She's his senior. He might be older but it would be surprising if he didn't saw her before, especially with the number of brands that she's been worked with as of late. “Really?” She teasingly asks, grinning at him. “I do hope it's not somewhere rather crazy.” She adds as she crosses her arms across her chest. She gives him a nod. She does like sports and martial arts, just as much as she likes dancing and attention. “Wouldn't I be at a disadvantage? Not to point out the obvious but you're a guy.” Tilting her head to the side as she looked at him. “What does the winner get though? If ever.”

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

❛ ❪ to my youth｡

date: 07XX19 mentioned: soojin word count: 623 trigger warning/s: n/a synopsis: things that went through candy’s mind after spending time with baby soojin.

A villain will always see themselves as the hero in their story. This was something she read somewhere but Candy knew that she’s no hero and maybe she’ll never be one. She’s nothing but a villain. Maybe an anti-hero at best. Was it selfish of her to save herself and only herself? Was she unfair to put up her walls so high that no one can climb them? Was it wrong for her to be greedy and want everything that life has for her to offer? Sometimes, she barely understands the way how life works. 

Fate has not always been kind to her just as life has always been a tad bit unfair to everyone. Memories of yesterday seem so clear to her like daylight and promises of tomorrow seem like light years away from where she’s looking. Ahead of her is nothing but mystery and she dares not to look back on her past but after meeting Soojin, it’s as if life was playing a cruel joke on her. Soojin was too much like her. The young Hwayoung who had nothing but her passion to fuel her. To drive herself towards her future. Greed was a sin and so was beauty. Both of which Candy and Soojin possess. A part of her always wondered how far were they alike. Just how much of Candy was reflected on Soojin. 

Looking at her was like watching herself in a different body and yet the same life. 

There was the will to keep going and the fear of not being able to stay afloat while the rest continued to move on with the flow of time. Their recent conversation struck her. The question “What would you like to tell your past self?” always sounded silly to Candy. Simply because she would probably try not to tell herself anything. There’s too much to take and so much to learn. But looking at Soojin, the question gets louder inside her head. What would present day Candy tell the Candy of yesterday if she could ever tell her anything? 

Where would she even begin? Would she end up terrifying herself more by carrying the burden of knowledge of her own future? There was so much she’d love to say but as her thoughts continue to get complicated, she sought a breath of fresh air and with a clear mind, she was able to untangle her messed up thoughts. “Everything will work out in the end.” She would like to tell herself that. Repeatedly if she has to. It’s something she learned to believe in after going through things. 

It’s something she wants Soojin to understand and believe in. 

Candy knows better than anyone else that she’s not the person that one should seek guidance for but if anything, she’s dealt with things in life she’s not sure people would be able to go through or understand, just as she knows there are things in life only certain people can go through. Battle upon battle, that’s what’s in store for everyone who pushes forward on this adventure they call life. Candy simply wants Soojin not to make the same mistakes she did before but she doesn’t want to interfere with the decisions that the young girl chooses in her life. Still, she wants to be a sort of guidance for her. 

This doesn’t make her a hero and she’s not aiming to be one. She’s just trying to be a better person. The world is fucked up in more ways than one already and she’s not a saint that deserve a limousine ride to heaven in the long run, but she wants to offer some light and guidance to those people who have lit up the way for her.

[dazzlingkai]

have you gone crazy? why are you leaving such a beautiful woman like me behind?

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

fmdxbin‌:

“Oh, that’s good…as long as you are healthy” Hanbin spoke offering what could pass a smile, he was clearly taken back by her reply yet he tried to brush it off and act as if it was something he expected. Though his next words did made him chuckle along with her. “That’s stupid, people should love you for the music you make not the way you look…much less how much you weight.” Bin muttered bitterly at the reality before realizing what he did and offering her a sheepish smile. 

Bin turned to look at her in a rapid motion, surprisingly without injuring his neck in the process. All traces of smiles gone from his face as a hurt experssion took over “You know that’s a lie” Hurt being clear on his voice as well. Pushing the thought to the back of his mind Bin looked back to what things he wanted to buy for his guys letting go of the hurt expresion replacing it with a neutral one. “I like taking care of them” the ones in his heart would always come first in his mind, that’s how it had always been and would always be for him. “I take care of myself too, no need to worry” He offered her a small smile.

Being healthy was a requirement they needed as idols. Given how hectic their schedule can be, Candy knew better than anyone else it's not easy to stay in tip-top shape every time. “I do hope you've been well too.” 2013 was so long ago but how they ended always seemed like it was just yesterday. Was she too harsh on him? Had she pushed him too far back then? Still, he made it on his own out there. He debuted. That's what's important. How can she regret whatever she said to him back then when he basically managed to get out of that hell hole in one piece and become the man that he is today? 

“People say they love us because of our music and will continue to love us no matter what but there are people out there who throw us away at the slightest imperfections. Just one issue and strike, you're out. Down with the negative comments you go.” It's a harsh world they live in. But it's the reality they had to face. Being under the spotlight, everything they do is watched not just by their company and their fans, but the rest of the world as well. Whether they like it or not. 

“I was kidding.” Candy pushed with a smile, still holding the candy bars at hand. She smiled at him, radiant as the sun. But isn't that the truth? Everyone is simply after beauty anyway. “But who takes care of you?” She asked. 

“Don't try to be a saint. Taking care of yourself first isn't a crime.”

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

fmdsoojin‌:

   if there’s someone that might understand soojin right now, it’s probably hwayoung candy. maybe because the wish member really looks up to her, maybe because they’re very similar in many ways – either way, the older female can be a tiny bit hard on the vocalist at times ( like when she tried to push soojin into facing her fears and showed that maybe she was too much of a cry baby to even be real ) but, deep down, soojin is aware that it’s for her own good, for her candy is exactly like hyeju. they both bring her up when she’s falling down and call her out when something’s going the wrong way. maybe she should’ve seen this all coming, the stress. the fear. having a solo was her dream, ever since the staff started talking about it a few years ago, however, she was never called to record a song of her own until a few months ago. she saw her members, one by one, having something before she could even say anything. 

   her eyes are fixed on the black phone screen before she turns back to the older female. ‘‘i already recorded bee, they also want me to start mcing next month. i’m happy i’ll be getting some attention and i’m glad they finally realized that i exist but why do i feel… weird? i’m always last and it sucks’‘ - her right hand is busy making a mess of her ear piercings, an old nervous habit soojin acquired a while ago. she knew exactly what she was feeling but how was she supposed to let out everything to candy, someone that has her own problems as well? - ‘‘and now i’m bothering you with it, which wasn’t the plan but i feel like you would understand.’’, she added while trying to offer a smile to her friend. ‘’are you ready for the tour? i wanted to get you something but didn’t really know what to buy so i hope my presence is enough’‘ / &.* @fmdcandy

Soojin being Candy and Hyeju's daughter is an ongoing joke between the three, at least, it was Candy who often jokes out that Soojin is her and Hyeju's love child. The younger female reminds Candy so much of herself and she felt like it was her responsibility to make sure she actually gets herself some good guidance. Not that Candy labels herself anything remotely close to being good but she can stray Soojin away from making the same bad decisions she once did. Candy was sipping on her iced coffee when Soojin spoke, her eyes still on the phone continuously typing away till she was able to send the message. Only then did she look at Soojin. 

“Being the last one doesn't mean you suck. This isn’t a race. We all go at our own pace.” 

It's the mentality Candy has been pushing others to actually understand. “Stop that. You might hurt yourself.” She watched Soojin do something she seems to do so often when her nerves are shaken, Candy had those when she was younger, just a little worse. “And for the love of my iced coffee, stop thinking you're a bother. I understand what you mean, Soo. I do.” Reaching out to the female, she gives her a gentle pat on the head. She's innocent, young and good. Everything Candy is but was overlooked. She carefully takes a breath and sighs. 

“I'm the third one to pursue a solo career in my group. I've been asking for it for so long but they never really considered it until I gained attention. But if you really think about it, people have already considered my group a failure before I got my solo.” She shrugs, she's over the stress now but she remembers how much she struggled to stay afloat that time. “Worse part of it was the fact that I'm just a vocalist in my group. I don't have Goeun's voice. I'm not a lead vocalist like Hyeju. We were preparing for the tour, the comeback, and all these special performances when I was about to make my debut. I asked myself, over and over again if I can do it. I said yes even though I was basically struggling to keep up with my schedules.” Candy looks down on her phone, a small yet seemingly exhausted smile graces her lips. 

“I told myself, I wasn't good enough. But when you think about it, who is actually good enough? You don't have to be good enough for everyone but yourself. At least, if you have faith in yourself and what you do, you'll be able to see there are people out there who see you far greater than you see yourself.” The older gives a brief pause in her words as she looks at Soojin. 

“Dearest, your presence IS and WILL ALWAYS BE more than enough. Thank you.”

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

fmdaidynn‌:

[ just no ] yeah yeah that works  [ just no ] i’ll try and text you next time we come back to seoul [ just no ] where do you live again?

⌈✉️ ➝ beom⌋ ↳ sure. we’re on tour as well anyway. ↳ i still live in my gangnam apartment. do you need the address? ↳ i thought about moving but i’m so busy these days. ↳ have you moved out of the dorm already?

[turntoturnover-deactivated20250]

hey it’s me: a huge fan of attention and validation

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

jiminfmd‌:

  “i’m absolutely famished. split a sandwich with me?” she asked her now companion, doing all but batting her eyelashes, her diet abandoned the moment she spotted someone who might give her an excuse not to simply get a salad. her smile was practically cheshire. “consider it a favor, it’ll keep my managers off me about my diet.” 

While Lipstick's promotions are coming to an end, Candy had managed to escape her hectic schedule for once. Her decision to actually fill herself up was an impulsive one. She had gone to the cafe, her table filled with the good stuff. Grilled steak sandwich, pesto fettuccine, a slice of a triple chocolate cake and iced americano. As she was taking a bite of her sandwich, she spots Jimin who seems to greet her in a rather too friendly manner. As if they weren't friends. She knows the other well enough to see that glimmer on her eyes. It didn't seem like a good idea. 

“What do you want?” She asks the other, it might seem rude to others but she wasn't being rude, she was simply too knowing of things like such. For someone whose body should be model worthy, Candy was successful in it. It just so happen that her diet is much different from the girls. While they were being asked to lose weight, Candy was being asked to gain weight. 

“Are you even allowed to eat stuff like this?” She asked, taking a huge bite on her sandwich, batting her eyelashes at the other in return. Still, she gives Jimin half of her sandwich. There was a time in her life when BC thought she should go on diet. It was ages ago, but still, Candy knew better than not to share her food. She won't be the one landing herself on hot waters anyway. “Don't complain to me if your manager makes you work out for an extra thirty minutes. Have a seat, Ji. Before they think you're a beggar.” Candy teases the other playfully, shaking her head.

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

❛ ❪ july schedule | prima donna tour in taiwan｡

date: 072019 mentioned: n/a word count: 657 trigger warning/s: n/a synopsis: candy’s thoughts about the goeun fiasco and lipstick’s busy touring schedules.

While June is the month for getaways and comebacks, July was just another busy month for her. As their promotions come to an end, Lipstick goes back on tour. One moment she was performing on stage, bidding their fans farewell and then they see them again at the airport as the girls get on a plane to fly to Taiwan for their tour. It’s a good thing that they are kept busy and that BC is keeping them away from the Goeun fiasco. She left the group and it’s been about two years since her decision to do so.

The group has already managed to move on, having done their best to fill the void the main vocalist has left. A part of her will always have a distaste for Goeun’s decision to leave, taking all the attention to herself even after she had already left the group. An utter disappointment is all she’ll ever be to Candy. She had almost ruined Lipstick’s whole career with her selfish decision. Candy may not like Lipstick, that’s for sure, but she wasn’t one to be stupid enough to make selfish decisions that could harm the group. She may have wanted to be the first one to actually leave the group and make a name for herself, but still, she didn’t. She wasn’t that evil enough to throw everyone off the cliff without giving them any safety net or parachute. Things have changed for her as of late for the better after all. 

Honestly, she’s been surprised that BC was even willing to keep the former main vocalist in the company but then again, even if anyone in the group has opinions about all of this happening, none of them were allowed to speak their minds. BC had forbidden all their artists to say anything about the issue. Not like anyone would dare to do so, knowing what controversies it could land them on.

While Lipstick’s managers try their best to keep the girls safe from the swarm of fans upon their arrival in Taiwan, Candy couldn’t help but keep a smile on her lips and waving her hands at the fans who have continued to love and support them throughout the years. Nothing can keep her from shining. Whether they had seven members or six. They were loved, nonetheless, that’s for sure. 

Her day starts with getting ready for rehearsals in the morning. While fans have lined up outside, they were rehearsing on stage. As usual, Candy was stuck by Hyeju’s side like pulling them apart would call for a catastrophe. She’s aware that after two days in Taiwan, they’ll return to South Korea to rest for a day then they’ll fly once again for the shoot in Jeju-do. While this comes as an opportunity to rest up and take it easy, they’re really not taking it easy at all. They’re leaving for Malaysia after they wrap up their photoshoot. It’s as if every time she takes a moment to close her eyes, she opens them up and sees that they’re in a different place now. No time to relax anymore.

The staff members are in a rush to get the show going. Every Lipstick member was being taken care of. Getting their hair and makeup fixed, last minute fitting touch-ups, and having their microphones checked. This was normal, Candy thought. Lipstick has gone on multiple tours before. Still, being away from home does make her feel somewhat sad. She’s busy on her phone, talking to some important people back home. It gave her the strength to keep going. The fans outside were loudly cheering, singing along to their song while they got ready. As the lights go out in the concert hall, all the members of Lipstick take their places. Getting ready to start the show.

There might be only six of them on stage but they still and will continue to dominate the stage like no other.

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

Huge ass disadvantage of living alone? 

My front door was wide open for some reason when I came down to go to the bathroom. Needless to say, I'm getting a security camera installed over the weekend. Oh, and yes, I double lock all my doors so this is no accident. Now the front door is getting a triple lock and a security cam as well.

Good news: Nothing seems to be stolen.

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

❝PLAYLIST 11: NEMESIS BY CANDY❞

( 07 TRACKS)

Poor Unfortunate Souls - The Little Mermaid

Friends on the Other Side - The Princess and the Frog

Hellfire - The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Cruella De Vil - 101 Dalmatians

Mother Knows Best - Tangled

Prince Ali (Reprise) - Aladdin

Gaston - Beauty and the Beast

NEMESIS.

Nemesis is the goddess revenge. She’s also known as Rhamnousia. The greek name means “to give what is due”. The playlist contains seven songs that are all from Disney’s classic movies. Unlike the Hebe playlist which draws nothing but innocence, the Nemesis playlist surely is more enjoyed by Candy who is now a grown adult. Villain songs from the Disney Classics were not that much understood by the younger audience but much loved and understood by the older audience who sees the light and dark parts of life. For some reasons, Candy relates more to the villains of the film more than she relates to the protagonists who see only the good things in everything.

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

fmdchangmin‌:

    “when i’m around you, i feel like a child being dragged around with his mom on errands he could avoid.” a quick sigh as he tugged on the black mask that fitted to his small face. he wasn’t sure how to even begin with candy and why changmin was out at the grocery store with her. what seemed to be a normal day had turned into him pushing the cart, body leaning lazyily as he walked slowly down the candy aisle alongside the older woman. “you should buy me some chocolate for tagging along, i could be sleeping right now.” with how busy charm is and the limited days they’re in korea, changmin wanted to use his time wisely, maybe sleeping or playing video games to pass time. not playing pretend with a member of lipstick, if the seventeen year old changmin saw him now - he would laugh in his face and say how stupid he’s being for complaining. “are you planning to cook a grand meal with all this food?”

Pushing the cart and looking down on her list, Candy was in her own world. She then leaves Changmin in charge of the cart while she went on to get the ingredients to whatever she's making. Lipstick will be going on tour so she plans to make something for Insik and a little something to encourage Soojin with her solo promotions as she won't be present to congratulate her favorite WISH member. “You said you were bored. Look at you complaining when all you're doing is to push the cart.” Candy doesn't bother to look at him, she just goes ahead on grabbing whatever was on her list, tossing it in the cart and have Changmin push it around. 

“Fine. Grab a chocolate bar then.” She tells him but Candy, on the other hand, was grabbing multiple chocolate bars for herself. Locking eyes with Changmin, she didn't even seem to be bothered. The whole fandom knows how much Candy loves her chocolates and how she always has one in her bag and yet her body doesn't seem like she's got a bad obsession with it. 

“I'm going to make food for my bae and my baby. Lipstick is going on tour, Min. I can't leave without taking care of a few things. Besides, I can't entrust Hyeju to help me make something for Soojin. She might just buy something somewhere. I'm not having that.” Wagging her finger at the male. Candy's affection for Soojin grew so much since Hawaii and she's not going into details about her bae. It's not like it's a secret that Candy dates around with ease. 

“Wait a minute, why do you keep on complaining? Are you supposed to meet someone today? As far as I know, you're probably just going to stay in bed at the dorm for the whole day.”

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

durifmd‌:

     he always knew the risk of meeting with his friends that were females; a chance of misunderstanding was always a chance. however, that seemed to be something that would steer away from duri, feeling like he was one of the lucky ones on that. he was simply just meeting friends, there was nothing about it! especially since he didn’t ‘swing’ in that direction. there’s a small giggle that moves past his lips, “yay!” he exclaimed in celebration. he made his way over to the couch, sitting down upon it as he always did; for some reason, most of the time, his feet wouldn’t touch the ground and just stay upon what he was sitting on. 

he nodded his head, “i do! they’re all so good!” he says, another small giggle can’t help but to leave his lips as she poked his arm. both candy and taeyong had really done such a great job on candy’s album, that was truly known. his smile grows a bit, “ah, we’ll have to see if the next album will have any feature spots! i’ll know who to call now!” he said, nodding his head happily. 

there’s a soft giggle and a pinkish tint across his cheeks; duri was always good at getting flustered whenever someone complimented him. it seemed to be something that he wouldn’t ever grow used to. “thank you!” he said, smiling a bit more. “we should do something together! we should sing together! i think people really liked our ost, right? i think it would be fun for us to put something together sometime!”

“Oh, yes! People did like it, well, maybe except for some obsessive fans of yours who think you're too good for me.” There were always haters and malicious commenters. Be it because they're of opposite genders or because Knight is a somewhat scandalous group, more than other boy groups. Candy didn't really care. It's not like her intention was to cause him trouble. They literally just sang an ost together, but people always have different opinions, that's all. 

“Oppa, I sing more lines in our comebacks now.” Candy tells Duri. Which is no lie at all. Ever since Goeun's departure, Hyeju basically took her spot and Candy just so happens to be the third one to have most lines now. It's a big deal for her. Considering most of their songs back then were mostly Goeun's parts. “I took extra vocal lessons too for my debut. See? I'm getting better and better. I hope you're proud.” Candy has a playfully proud look on her face. Duri has always been that kind of supportive cousin because of his vibe. He's just always positive and it makes Candy feel as if there's no need for her to put up her walls around him at all. 

“Anyway, what have you been up to lately? Not overworking, I hope.” Her eyes look at him worriedly. There's always a time when idols get overworked and it's not even a joke they can take lightly as it is the truth. “Oppa, you should really go out there and meet someone. I'm worried about you. You're too good for this world.”

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

❛ CANDY AESTHETIC (XVI):  JE T'ADORE​ ― ❜

❝ Le prix d'Amour, c'est seulement Amour il faut aimer si l'on veut être aimé. The price of love is love itself. One must love if one wishes to be loved. ❞ ( @fmdinsik )

[miyanesignsup]

[fmdcandy-archive-blog]

Candy during her 06XX19 IG Live