❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞

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One Nice Bug Per Day
Claire Keane
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Not today Justin

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@forgottenengineer-archive
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
❝ I won’t give up I can’t give up ❞
So, I’m about to move this blog over to a new one, here.
Would it be a stretch to ask someone to design a promo because all I seem capable of making at the moment is utter crap. (*tina belcher groan*)
You would have my undying love if you did. Jenna already has monthly claims on my soul, sorry.
What if.... what if I came back? (again)
I return from the depths of hell to let you all know that @tosaveliives is super fucking rude.
Me: *Just getting generally sad while watching 1x02* Me: They were gonna have pet fishies Jenna: Instead they swam with fishes
Look, I hardly have the heart in me to write this out the once let alone go out and apologise to every single person who’s been trying to contact me or that I’ve scared, so I’m going to write this, I’m going to schedule it for a few more times and then I’m done.
Simply existing is a monumental task right now. I try not to advertise it, but I’m sure that, at least those I talk to regularly know that I’ve not had a great turn of things the past few months. On wednesday they plummeted straight through rock bottom to the underworld of bad. I’ve been bored and a little lonely having a broken ankle, so a few friends thought it would be lovely to take me out to a meal, chip in to pay for it, help me out blah blah, they’re sweet people. Or were. The place we were heading to was in the next town over so it was a twenty minute drive after everyone was picked up.
We were on the road out of town, it was getting late and dark but things were nice and quiet because it was the middle of the week and some fucking idiot didn’t have his lights on and he was driving on the wrong fucking side of the road, straight towards us and we would have been fine if we hadn’t met him at the one and only bend on that road. Head on collision, car span, rolled, metal crumpled and there was glass breaking and all I knew was that only one person was making sounds, the one in the passenger seat in front of me and that moment is probably the most clear because she was coughing up a lot of blood and she was so terrified and I had to watch her drown in it, trapped by the weight of someone else’s body.
The fucking idiot who hit us got off easy, couple of cuts and bruises but otherwise unharmed and since I’m the only one who’s survived from out car I have to go to court and hearings and answer questions about the night and look this guy in the face and know he’s killed four of my friends who were just trying to be nice to me and do a good thing. I have to deal with their families hating me, because I was the reason they were going out, I was the only one who survived and no one will fucking treat me like a human being or talk to me normally and every time I so much as blink I’m remembering bits and pieces of it all in flashes.
So I’m god damn sorry for scaring people, for being selfish and taking care of myself for once. Maybe I did handle this the wrong way but I just can’t cope with anything any more, I just can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I don’t know how to function any more.
Look, I hardly have the heart in me to write this out the once let alone go out and apologise to every single person who’s been trying to contact me or that I’ve scared, so I’m going to write this, I’m going to schedule it for a few more times and then I’m done.
Simply existing is a monumental task right now. I try not to advertise it, but I’m sure that, at least those I talk to regularly know that I’ve not had a great turn of things the past few months. On wednesday they plummeted straight through rock bottom to the underworld of bad. I’ve been bored and a little lonely having a broken ankle, so a few friends thought it would be lovely to take me out to a meal, chip in to pay for it, help me out blah blah, they’re sweet people. Or were. The place we were heading to was in the next town over so it was a twenty minute drive after everyone was picked up.
We were on the road out of town, it was getting late and dark but things were nice and quiet because it was the middle of the week and some fucking idiot didn’t have his lights on and he was driving on the wrong fucking side of the road, straight towards us and we would have been fine if we hadn’t met him at the one and only bend on that road. Head on collision, car span, rolled, metal crumpled and there was glass breaking and all I knew was that only one person was making sounds, the one in the passenger seat in front of me and that moment is probably the most clear because she was coughing up a lot of blood and she was so terrified and I had to watch her drown in it, trapped by the weight of someone else’s body.
The fucking idiot who hit us got off easy, couple of cuts and bruises but otherwise unharmed and since I’m the only one who’s survived from out car I have to go to court and hearings and answer questions about the night and look this guy in the face and know he’s killed four of my friends who were just trying to be nice to me and do a good thing. I have to deal with their families hating me, because I was the reason they were going out, I was the only one who survived and no one will fucking treat me like a human being or talk to me normally and every time I so much as blink I’m remembering bits and pieces of it all in flashes.
So I’m god damn sorry for scaring people, for being selfish and taking care of myself for once. Maybe I did handle this the wrong way but I just can’t cope with anything any more, I just can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I don’t know how to function any more.
Skye
forgottenengineer liked for a starter
She’s half distracted by the phone in her hands, trying to crack into the defense set up by the HYDRA goon that was currently being questioned by a combination of both Melinda May and Bobbi Morse. Skye would have loved to have been there, but they need the information on the phone ASAP.
She turns her head when she sees Fitz standing in the doorway, and she waves a bit before turning back to the phone. “Wanna take a bet on what’s on the phone? Lance has ten bucks on tentacle porn.”
Lips quirk softly & Fitz shuffles in to rest against a set of draws, pressing his palms against the wood. Skye’s behavior seems invitation enough for him to join her in the room. He hadn’t been sure about that a moment ago & it’s such a relief, even if his brain is fumbling for a sharp response that’s equally humorous.
❝ Uh, I think I would prefer embarrassing selfies.... but I suppose anything’s likely with that lot. ❞ & there sits a sliver of pride-he hadn’t faltered with his words or taken too long- that turns the small polite smile into something more bright & genuine.
Raina
The Clairvoyant was silent for a long moment, the only sound issuing from behind her veil being the rasping hiss of her breath. He was laughing. Bold. Irreverent. Questioning her judgement. Not altogether ‘cocky’ but there was a sense of arrogance despite his hopelessness. An agent, through and through. If she’d missed anything from her old life, from her dead self, it was that back and forth she’d entertained time and time again. And nobody did back and forth better than an agent of SHIELD–no one could put a better spin on a hopeless situation, than an Eagle with blood on his lips. A pity she hadn’t had her boys rough Fitz up a little first. But then, he was frail enough as it was, and her Centipedes were nothing if not dutiful… sometimes overzealous.
She waited patiently for him to find his words–now there was a game she was used to; Cal had been just the same way–and after a moment, she tilted her head to one side.
“Missing facts,” the Clairvoyant mused. “No… I don’t think so. You see I’ve put a great deal of thought and time and effort into this. Into your… selection.”
Again, she paused, and this time, her golden eyes flicked to the men on either side of the engineer. She raised a hand and waved them away without a word. The Centipede soldiers immediately dropped Fitz, and turned in unison, marching from the room. The Clairvoyant waited until the heavy boom of the closing door signaled that she and the agent were alone, before she reached up and lowered her hood. She peeled away the black veil that had shadowed the lower half of her face, and flashed Fitz a wry, bitter smile.
“That’s better,” she choked out, and the thin flaps of skin at the unhealed gash in her throat fluttered slightly with her breathing. “I see no point in pretense, not between old friends. It pains me a great deal more to speak than the last time we saw one another, so I’ll do my best to be frank. You’re a genius. You’re an engineer. And I have ways to coax you into doing what I want. If I have to, I’ll manipulate or force you. I’ve heard about the damage you’ve sustained since Ward’s ill-fated swimming lesson, but I’ve heard about your improvements as well. I think you can help me… and I think you will. So then, Fitz: what exactly am I missing?”
Everything became marginally easier without the awfully firm grips of the soldiers, or so he would have thought it to have been so. Balance was lost in the moment & his form tipped, just the slightest, forwards, palms stretched flat to meet the smooth floor- he didn’t want to think about what may or may not have happened in this warehouse in the recent or distant past- but he hadn’t quite made it far enough & Fitz’s form straightened once more. He certainly lacked the training of a field agent ( everyone knew that ) & it was felt in the way pain began to spike in his bones pressed to the floor & how hands running with small tremors pressed sturdy fingers against skin.
While fingers moved & pressed to counteract the off-pink imprints of fingers dug deep blue eyes maintained a steady connection. He had been right. From that knowledge elation & horror had blossomed & lungs instinctively recoiled. He had known she was different, truly looked different, voice & hood alone was indicative of such a fact. Despite having preconceived notions of her altered form nothing could have stopped the slackness of Fitz’s jaw, slightly parted lips & wide eyes following his soft gasp.
Her words caused distraction enough, in the form of eyes drawn to the movement of loose skin, so much that the nature of Raina’s words- the topic of their conversation- had almost been lost to him entirely. Sudden realization forced lips to meet & his own throat to swallow with the nerves the engineer had almost forgotten- buried beneath laughter & horror ( perhaps disgust )- so that he might answer.
His train of thought had been ushered aside- another fault of Ward’s- & it was only after a long moment of stumbling over disconnected syllables that he recalled them.
❝ Well...then you should know.. about my uh ❞ on cue hands separated from from flesh developing a bruise & twisted awkwardly before him to aid words- to explain- ❝ They don’t work so well any more. ❞ A moment too late it occurred that such explanation may have rendered him useless & therefore dead.
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