Fortune & Frame | Blog

We make jewelry, frames & other things that hold fortunes.

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Okay, how cute is this?? We just sent out our first birth announcement fortune with a mini fortune cookie necklace. Time and date separated by a ❤...

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I walked in this morning and found the snake chains had just arranged themselves like this in the display case. They have a mind of their own. Which is precisely what I like about them.

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Version no. 74839487 of the F&F line sheet is finally done. Now I know what giving birth feels like...

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Fire escape photo shoot before the rain started and after spending all morning looking for a natural-light lightbulb... Natural light. Outside. But of course.

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Emily Meade of HBO's show @hbotheleftovers at last night's Barbie x CFDA event, looking beautiful and fun in our gold mini fortune cookie pendant + an amazing green sequined skirt you unfortunately can't see here... #barbie #cfda #cfdanyfw #nyfw #barbie #hbotheleftovers #theleftovers #emilymeade #hbo

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Laundry day.

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You guys! We're huge in New Zealand! Or we're "wee" in New Zealand. But whatever, we're in New Zealand! Yay! Check out our q&a with the very cool site TheLifeRoom.com.

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A photo recap of the Fortune & Frame Summer Cocktail event this week. Thanks again to everyone who came out to wonderlandbeautyparlor to see the collection!

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Late-night crew at tonight’s amazing event. Thanks to everyone who came to see the collection and hang out! More pics to come! 

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"Let things unfold. Relinquish control." . I think I often confuse other people’s need for chaos as a cry for me to come in and introduce structure. But I’m learning that what helps me navigate my otherwise chaotic life can feel controlling to them (similar to the way that people telling me what to do feels to me). It can even feel like rejection; like I’m imposing rules for how I want other people to be because who they are isn’t good enough. Letting go of this control is freeing for me and it’s the only way to let things unfold naturally. Which is the only way to fly. (Read full write-up at fortuneandframe.com/fortunes)

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This is something I picked up in one of my sociology classes forever ago and have remembered ever since. It points out what an uphill battle it is to influence a group as a glaring outsider. When you're seen as different, it's too easy for a group to write you off as irrelevant, pesky or meddling.

I'm a big fan of people who infiltrate situations from the inside; who get buy-in from a group and then slowly plant the seed of new ideas--not because they have an agenda, but because they have a different perspective.

I remember sitting in a Nantucket Yacht club with a past boyfriend and his family, feeling ridiculously out of place but admiring a fabulously eccentric woman with spiky hair and a loud mouth. As someone who's always felt like an outsider no matter where I am, I liked her style. She didn't belong either but instead of feeling displaced, she owned every minute of it.

I like to fly a bit more under the radar than this though. I like for my distinguishing factors to be my thoughts, ideas and perspective, not the way I look, dress or talk. I'm happy to be a chameleon on those matters (when-in-Rome style). But this isn't a call to sell out either; to be something you're not or go undercover to challenge group think. Quite the opposite. It's a call for integrity of ideas and beliefs, and to feel comfortable dissenting from group think when you're in the unique position to share your perspective with people who otherwise might not be open to receiving it. With time, what is considered weird will be considered eccentric, and what's considered eccentric will become intriguing. Intriguing can morph all the way into a new normal.

Clearly this form of influence is a long-term play. The alternative, however, is attacking from the outside, aggressively challenging deep-seated ideas, and just going into full-force battle. Think Jesus. Think Occupy Wall Street. Think every single feminist movement. These approaches to idea spreading are also effective--and sometimes they're the only option--but can be gory.  In all cases, know who you are, own it, and don't back down.

In related:

"Run the risk of being different, but learn to do so without attracting attention." — Paulo Coelho

"If you're poor, you're crazy. If you're rich, you're eccentric." — A bumper sticker my mom always liked

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Ooh la la, cute boy with his fave fortune saved on his phone… His fortune: “Nothing is impossible to a willing heart.” ❤ 

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This one is a hybrid of a few of my go-to life mantras; a self-explanatory reminder that what people reveal about themselves upfront is often a finely curated version of their relatively more complex realities. Not because they're liars--this applies to most of us, after all--but because they've learned through their unique life experiences that it's safe to show some things and potentially dangerous to show others. For me, deciding whether it's worth it to dive in deeper and learn more about a person or take them at face value and move on usually comes down to the presence or absence of vulnerability. If I can see a glimmer of humanness cracking through the armor, I can reliably tap into an almost endless well of patience and compassion. Recently I decided to look at myself through this lens. Would I be able to be patient and compassionate with me...if I weren't me? I've always struggled to show the same vulnerability that I require of others. And as a result I don't always get generous reactions from them. What I show on the outside is that I'm tough, I don't need anyone's help, and I'm self-sufficient to a fault. But what I'm often feeling inside is like a scared little girl who's afraid to show weakness for fear of getting hurt.  I often challenge myself with holding the world's most painful poses in Bikram yoga, longer than anyone else, and without any indication that I'm in pain. I've become somewhat of a pro at it which is directly applicable to how I go through life. While having the world's greatest poker face might be effective in a yoga studio, it's not so effective for deepening relationships--or sometimes even starting them. I just hope that while I'm trying to figure out how to let people in, they'll recognize my inability to do so as the most vulnerable thing about me. And that I'll be able to do the same for them.

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Be still my black beating heart... Here are a few pieces we just cast in black rhodium. 

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"Innocence is bliss." This is one that I still have a hard time converting from theory into practice. Not so much in my everyday life or work; mostly in relationships. When things get off track—whether in a small or a big way—I habitually assume it’s my fault. Panic sets in. I move to fix things instead of sitting still with the discomfort of conflict until the natural next steps reveal themselves for all involved. Must. Fix. Now. I’m sure somewhere along the way I adopted the sense that if it things are my fault, that means I can fix them. But assuming that one has this level of control—that everything that happens is a direct influence of their actions alone—is too much responsibility for one person to absorb. It eliminates grace, silences intuition, and doesn’t hold the other(s) involved accountable for their contributions to a shared conflict. It tampers with the truth, and therefore results in solving the wrong problems (and possibly creating new ones). 

As I’ve become more aware of this ancient guilt, I’ve also become aware of my and other people’s innate innocence. We’re all doing our best to work toward love, but we all had different examples of what love is. To some of us, love was mean. Love was withheld. It was used as a bargaining chip. Basically, love wasn’t love at all, but it’s what we learned when we were innocent and it’s how we’ve come to express our feelings later. Because of this, our good intentions can feel malicious to those on the receiving end. 

Instead of trying to resolve the bigger picture, which is out of your control anyway, rest in the innocence that was there when you learned to love. Create a safe space from which you can re-learn how to do it in a way that doesn’t result in pain (for yourself or others). Let yourself off the hook. The people around you will begin doing the same. And your innate innocence will guide you back to your innate bliss.

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The Fortune Cookie Locket's world tour continues with a stop in Phoenix, where it appeared on the Good Morning Arizona Show! 

#GoodMorningArizona #graduationgifts #graduation #fortunecookielocket #fortunecookiejewelry #fortunecookienecklace #fortunecookie 

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Here's a sneak pic of the artistic China Town photo shoot that @wtf_magazine set up for their launch issue (out next month!), starring the stunning @she_wulff and our Fortune Cookie Locket. So psyched to be a part of it! 😍 (at Canal Street/China Town/Little Italy)