FrCathie

Free range priest

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Holiday Family Therapy

(photo: Ross Caimano) My Uncle Bill died of pancreatic cancer in May. This past weekend the family gathered to bury him – with full military honors – at Arlington National Cemetery. When I say gathered, I mean streamed in from every direction, from as far away as Myanmar, in planes and trains and automobiles, in vans full of grown siblings and parents and cousins, to pay tribute to Bill’s amazing…

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Give

The big feast is over, and hopefully everyone got through the meal with as much graciousness and gratefulness as possible! All week I have been offering suggestions for holy conversation, for time to really share with each other despite our differences, to do the work of peace. I hope that taking the time to listen, feel, and thank has lowered the stress and increased the real caring at your…

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Thank

Today is the day. Giving thanks is the whole point of this gathering. And when we are in the midst of people we may not know well, or people we may dread discussing certain topics with, it is good to remember. All week I have been posting about holy conversation, about how actually talking with each other, instead of avoiding hard topics, might make the world a little better, might bring us all a…

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Feel

Yesterday’s holy conversation advice was listen. Today, it’s feel. Feelings are running very high in our current times, and have caused people to quit Facebook, Twitter and other social media. And made lots of us dread holiday gatherings, or even any gathering where sensitive topics might come up. The feelings we are having about them can seem overwhelming, even exhausting. And this seems to be…

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Listen

This is my second post this week about having holy conversation, instead of just small talk, at our holiday gatherings. You can read the first post here. When we think about conversation, we usually imagine people talking. But I think that the key ingredient, especially if the topic is difficult, should always be listening. It seems that in this cultural moment, especially, so many people are…

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Holy(day) Conversation

I know. This year, of all years, we are dreading being around the table with a certain aunt, or a very old family friend, or a group of strangers, and having to talk. About something, anything, other than that. Politics. Religion. Various lifestyle choices or eating habits. Whatever it is, there will be strong opinions. Whatever it is, there will be eye-rolling. This year, there may be raised…

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Forgive us our trespasses

Forgive us our trespasses

Those of us who go to church say this every week, and even nonbelievers know the words to the Lord’s Prayer – ‘forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us’. I have been thinking a lot about forgiveness this week, and not just about forgiving other people. I have been thinking about people I need to apologize to, people I hope will forgive me for how I have wronged them.…

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Forgiveness, faith and politics

Forgiveness, faith and politics

Last week, I did something I swore I would never do again – I voted. I talk a lot about not voting, and I don’t feel like anyone actually listens, they just try to tell me why I am wrong. I don’t feel like it is wrong to not want to participate in what feels like a great divide: us and them. None of us understand how they could possibly vote for that person, not with the way they act, how they…

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Free Range faith

On January 1 of this year, I left my well-paying job to set out on my own and become Free Range. It has been an amazing time as I have been exploring what it means to be a priest in the world, not serving a congregation or any other institutional role. I have worked with several churches, a few clergy people, another denomination, and done lots of stuff online. I taught a homiletics class in…

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Don't just do something. Sit there.

Don’t just do something. Sit there.

There is so much pain in the world right now. So much anger, fear, injustice and violence. It is hard to open our eyes to another new day when more people are grieving, or suffering, or are in conflict with one another. It is hard to feel helpless to solve the huge problems that seem to be bursting into public view and demanding that we pay attention to how they harm us: racism, discrimination,…

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Sheer silence

I am a priest and a blogger. I know I should be saying something about the horrific shooting that took place in Orlando this weekend. And yet, I am somehow unable to find the words. There are the words that describe what has already been said, many times over: shock, disbelief, anguish, fear, sorrow. Anger, despondency, helplessness. Tears, prayers, solidarity, support. And there are the words…

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Not that strong

“You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” Supposedly, Christopher Robin  said this to Winnie the Pooh, but I don’t believe everything the Internet says – do not even get me started on St. Francis and ‘preach the Gospel at all times…’, something he never said, despite how many times it’s quoted! Also, it may just be a false statement. My recollection…

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Diary of a Free Range Priest: God talk

Diary of a Free Range Priest: God talk

Some years ago, an acquaintance of mine and his wife asked if I would baptize their baby. I was a bit taken aback by this request, because I knew this person to be a fairly staunch agnostic, verging on atheist. So I asked them why they would want this. ‘Well, it’s a traditional thing,’ they said. ‘We like the idea of a naming ceremony, and we want all of our friends and family to come together…

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Not a Stepmom

A couple of years ago, I married a wonderful man with three tween-to-teenage kids. I love being part of all their lives, and the kids are great: fun to be around, smart, interesting, and kind (they were extremely kind to give me permission to use their photo for this blog post). We are learning to be a family, day by day. The only thing I don’t love about our life together: when people call me…

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Not Best Friends

I have lots of best friends – best friends from high school, college, seminary, various jobs; neighbor best friends and relative best friends and running best friends. I love them all (you know who you are!) For me, ‘best friend’ is a category, and I can quickly count about 10 people right now who are in it, who would drop everything if I needed them, who I can’t wait to call and catch up with.…

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Diary of a Free Range Priest: Wednesday night Bible study

Diary of a Free Range Priest: Wednesday night Bible study

When I was a parish priest, I was fortunate enough to meet a man I will call Arthur. Arthur walked into my church one Sunday morning because, he explained, he had been resisting the voice of Jesus that had been calling him every day for 20 years, and this day, he just couldn’t resist any more. He had never identified as a Christian and had never been inside a church except for a very occasional…

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Diary of a Free Range Priest: All things are lawful

Diary of a Free Range Priest: All things are lawful

I was reading an advice column the other day, in which a mother wrote in to say that she overheard her young adult daughter speaking to her teenage sister about her (the older’s) sex life, and about having casual sex with multiple partners. The mother was very troubled by her daughter’s behavior, and by her sharing it with her younger sibling, wondered what to do. The advice columnist told her,…

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