trying on a metaphor
todays bird
oozey mess
Claire Keane
occasionally subtle
Cosimo Galluzzi
wallacepolsom
will byers stan first human second
DEAR READER
KIROKAZE
Origami Around
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
ellievsbear
JBB: An Artblog!
d e v o n
@theartofmadeline
⁂
shark vs the universe
styofa doing anything
Kiana Khansmith
seen from Poland
seen from New Zealand
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Colombia
seen from Argentina
seen from Venezuela
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
@freelancepolicedotcom
“𝙄 𝙂𝙊𝙏 𝙄𝙏! 𝙄 𝙂𝙊𝙏 𝙄𝙏- 𝙃𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙤? 𝙁𝙧𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙡𝙞𝙘𝙚”
𝑻𝒂𝒈𝒔
𝑹𝒖𝒍𝒆𝒔
𝑨𝒏𝒐𝒏𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑨𝒔𝒌𝒆𝒓𝒔
ꪔ̤̫ ┈➤ 𝒅𝒊𝒔𝒄𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒗𝒆𝒓
ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ
▄︻デ╦═一━ bₐₙg! ₚₒw!
𝑨𝒔𝒌 𝒃𝒐𝒙 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒖𝒔 - relatively inactive ; your ask will be answered when the mod gets time! (still keep em coming! They aren’t always answered in order)
̤̫ the person running this blog has lost his s&mfp hyperfixation. He still cares greatly for the series, so asks will still be answered. Just not frequently.
_ ___________________, ⌖
“𝙒𝙀’𝙍𝙀 𝙊𝙉 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝘾𝘼𝙎𝙀!”
EMERGENCY COMMISSIONS
꩜ 𝖡𝗎𝗍 𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗆𝖾
My best friend of many years was just recently in a car crash, and unfortunately she was not able to get a license plate or any information on the perpetrator. Her car is completely destroyed and they told her in order to fix it she would need minimum 10k. She needs her vehicle for work.
She is a wonderful artist and a wonderful person, if you have any spare cash and would like a cheap commission she is offering $5 chibi commissions right now. Thank you so much for your time!
She also does more complex commissions if you’d rather that!
And her insta is @/swae.tae
Her disc is @/swaetama
One of you is getting pregnant, but you get to choose, which one of you is willing to go through labor?
“Realistically, neither of us should procreate or pass down whatever cursed genetics the gods have bestowed upon us. I don’t think the universe would be able to handle any more of Max than it already barely does.”
“That’s cute of you Sam, offering to go through the miracle of childbirth to prevent me from having offspring. Truly a selfless act.”
“Can it pal, plus New York allows abortions for anyone who even thinks about one.”
“I’ve been thinking about moving to Texas lately.”
I’m impressed by your bravery to have an open top desoto in a city filled with pigeons.
“Max shoots the little flying bastards that get anywhere near our car.”
“The blood is easier to clean.”
Dear Max.
What is your favorite kind of cheese? The rats have robbed me for the 5th time this week and aren't going to stop until I get something, and I quote "Guda then the last batch"
So. I'm going to ask someone I know who likes cheese and if it fails- how do I get rid of the rat-fioso?
“Moldy cheese.”
“Max, do you mean blue cheese?”
“Black mold.”
“You little scamp. What about the second question they asked pal?”
“Black mold.”
Can The Geek make weapons? If so, how much for a bazooka with homing capabilities?
“I’m not really supposed to be making weapons of mass destruction anymore.”
If its always getting later, how come is early sometimes?
“They say time is relative, but I think it’s rather complicated and highly based on what language you’re speaking.”
“I think you’ve spent too much time in the Time Machine!”
So Max did you change your mind on this, forgot or did Sam forcefully shave it off your face?
“Too much effort, and it made me look old.”
“But Max, you are old. We both are.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about Sam.”
Do you have to pay extra when you visit a barber shop Sam or do they just work on the fur on your head?
“We’ve been banned from most barber shops on account of Max’s violent impulses whenever he hears an electric razor.”
“The buzzing sound makes my spine tingle Sam.”
Sam, where the hell did you get the desoto?
“At a dealership back when they weren’t all too hard to find.”
“Sam I don’t think this anon has ever set foot in a dealership.”
“Neither have you little buddy.”
“That’s on account of my insatiable desire to play with every vehicle I see like toddler who’s only understanding of ‘play’ is throwing things.”
“You crack me up Max.”
UPDATE!!! EMERGENCY COMMISSIONS OPEN
I’ve found a place to stay but the down payment is $1200 usd. Please consider helping me out if you have the spare funds. Here are some examples of my art.
My prices are very cheap and you can get lots of things for $10 or less
Dm me here or on discord @green_static_bzzt_bzzt if you’re interested a commission. If you can’t commission but would like to help, please donate or reblog/share
C*sh*pp - $freelancepolice
V*nm* - freelancepolice
Everything helps, thank you.
Max, if you had to choose between Sam and your ideal man, who would you choose?
Sam has the same question BTW
“Flint Paper.”
What happened to the DeSotos roof
“???”
how is sam junior doing
“Max is trying to teach him how to read, it’s not going well. That little urchin has an attention span worse than an iPad rotted baby raised by neglectful parents who shouldn’tve had kids in the first place. The reading level of a fourth grader isn’t helping any either. It’s awfully cute though.”
*hands Max a chainsaw*
“That was probably a bad idea on your part, but I promise I’ll only destroy half of a wildlife reserve.”
Well boys, it’s pride month! You know what that means.
“What, do you want us to like, solve gay crimes? What?”
“I think it means we should graphic and violent sex in cowboy hats, oh and kill half the US Senators for sport.”
Sam and max I most humbly ask for romantic advice. I CANNOT PULL FOR THE LIFE OF ME AND IF SOMEONE TELLS ME TO “pUt YoUr SeLf OuT tHeRe” ONE MORE TIME A MIGHT SHOW UP ON THE NEWS. Thank you :D
“Separate them from their family and loved ones and convince them that you’re the only one who could ever love them.”
“Hmm, maybe I should get you a psychiatrist .”
“That’s a funny joke Sam.” 
