[9060x]

[a-smol-cunt-deactivated20181215]

I audibly gasped

[veganarchi]

[ruinedchildhood]

[quotespile]

“Why was she dancing? No reason. Just alive, I guess.”

— George Saunders, Tenth of December

[merrybitchmas91-deactivated2019]

Why "doing something relaxing” does not help your anxiety

A lot of the time when people give advice intended to relieve anxiety, they suggest doing “relaxing” things like drawing, painting, knitting, taking a bubble bath, coloring in one of those zen coloring books, or watching glitter settle to the bottom of a jar.

This advice is always well-intentioned, and I’m not here to diss people who either give it or who benefit from it. But it has never, ever done shit for me, and this is because it goes about resolving anxiety in the completely wrong way.  

THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO when suffering from anxiety is to do a “relaxing” thing that just enables your mind to dwell and obsess more on the thing that’s bothering you. You need to ESCAPE from the dwelling and the obsession in order to experience relief.

You can drive to a quiet farm, drive to the beach, drive to a park, or anywhere else, but as someone who has tried it all many, many times, trust me–it’s a waste of gas. You will just end up still sad and stressed, only with sand on your butt. You can’t physically escape your sadness. Your sadness is inside of you. To escape, you need to give your brain something to play with for a while until you can approach the issue with a healthier frame of mind. 

People who have anxiety do not need more time to contemplate, because we will use it to contemplate how much we suck.

In fact, you could say that’s what anxiety is–hyper-contemplating. When we let our minds run free, they run straight into the thorn bushes. Our minds are already running, and they need to be controlled. They need to be given something to do, or they’ll destroy everything, just like an overactive husky dog ripping up all the furniture. 

Therefore, I present to you: 

THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT DO WHEN ANXIOUS

–Go on a walk

–Watch a sunset, watch fish in an aquarium, watch glitter, etc.

–Go anywhere where the main activity is sitting and watching

–Draw, color, do anything that occupies the hands and not the mind

–Do yoga, jog, go fishing, or anything that lets you mentally drift 

–Do literally ANYTHING that gives you great amounts of mental space to obsess and dwell on things.

THINGS YOU SHOULD DO WHEN ANXIOUS:

–Do a crossword puzzle, Sudoku, or any other mind teaser game. Crosswords are the best.

–Write something. It doesn’t have to be a masterpiece. Write the Top 10 Best Restaurants in My City. Rank celebrities according to Best Smile. Write some dumb Legolas fanfiction and rip it up when you’re done. It’s not for publication, it’s a relief exercise that only you will see. 

–Read something, watch TV, or watch a movie–as long as it’s engrossing. Don’t watch anything which you can run as background noise (like, off the top of my head, Say Yes to The Dress.) As weird as it seems, American Horror Story actually helps me a lot, because it sucks me in. 

–Masturbate. Yes, I’m serious. Your mind has to concentrate on the mini-movie it’s running. It can’t run Sexy Titillating Things and All The Things That are Bothering Me at the same time. (…I hope. If it can, then…ignore this one.) 

–Do math problems—literally, google “algebra problems worksheet” and solve them. If you haven’t done math since 7th grade this will really help you. I don’t mean with math, I mean with the anxiety. 

–Play a game or a sport with someone that requires great mental concentration. Working with 5 people to get a ball over a net is a challenge which will require your brain to turn off the Sadness Channel. 

–Play a video game, as long as it’s not something like candy crush or Tetris that’s mindless. 

THINGS YOU SHOULD DO DURING PANIC ATTACKS ESPECIALLY:

–List the capitals of all the U.S. states

–List the capitals of all the European countries

–List all the shapes you can see. Or all the colors. 

–List all the blonde celebrities you can think of.

–Pull up a random block of text and count all the As in it, or Es or whatever.  

Now obviously, I am not a doctor. I am just an anxious person who has tried almost everything to help myself.  I’ve finally realized that the stuff people recommend never works because this is a disorder that thrives on free time and free mental space. When I do the stuff I listed above, I can breathe again. And I hope it helps someone here too. 

(Now this shouldn’t have to be said but if the “do nots” work for you then by all means do them. They’ve just never worked for me.)

[lovelyplot]

This would’ve been great an hour ago

[elliesgaymachete]

If your anxiety includes rapid heartbeat for no reason then it may help to exercise! It helps for me because I’m focused on whatever moves I’m doing and breathing, and it gives my heart rate a reason to be that high so that I can start the slow cooking down process and (hopefully) bring that heart rate down with it. Look up a quick cardio workout on YouTube or something and just do it in your room!

[systlin]

This is so, SO true. 

All ‘doing something relaxing’ ever did for me was give my brain MORE free time to FREAK THE FUCK OUT. 

[kipplekipple]

Drawing and making stuff does occupy my mind so I mean YMMV

[factbot]

[despazito]

the second radish is 29 feet away

[tranarchist]

[kompanie-mutter-deactivated2021]

this is legitimately the funniest post on this site

[verysmallgirl]

what doesn’t kill you makes you weird at parties

[imsoofuckingsad-deactivated2018]

Remember, you can disappear into the woods whenever you want. You’re an adult.

[minus-the-negative]

[atarnishedcompass]

Friend: Wanna hang out tomorrow?

Me: I actually performed an Activity yesterday. Please wait the three day recovery period to submit another inquiry

[sapphicphoenix]

Listening to your body is so much important than listening to diet culture

[livnuns]

[thecwst]

[crueltyfreerecipes]

GARDEN VEGGIE CHICKPEA SALAD SANDWICH

[madisonsaferillustration]

a little warm up sketch

[freshwaterwhale]

I’ve been newly single for a few months now and I still can’t get over how great it is to enjoy whatever the hell I enjoy and be into whatever the hell I’m into without having to think about how my partner is going to react to the thing I’m into

[wyntercraft-deactivated20190812]

Alfalfa: protection, money, happiness, grounding, fertility

Anise: dreams, youth, lust, blessing, cleansing, divination, offerings, protection, spirit protection

Allspice: energy, money, luck, healing

Aspen: protection, healing, performing arts, spirit work

Aloe: femininity, healing, protection, beauty, love

Basil: protection, grounding, happiness, peace, money, love, luck

Bay Leaf: wishes, dreams, psychic ability, cleansing, healing, curse breaking, banishing

Catmint: healing, animal magic, relaxation, calmness, happiness, psychic ability, love, wishes, meditation

Clove: healing, prosperity, friendships, money 

Clover: money, prosperity, luck, happiness, spirit work, fae, protection, healing

Chamomile: calmness, money, love, peace, cleansing, love, meditation

Chives: protection, balance, divination

Coriander/Cilantro: love, protection, divination, fertility, psychic ability, peace

Cinnamon: safety, calmness, love, happiness, money, blessing, protection, healing

Cardamom: femininity, love, charm, performing arts, relaxation, calmness

Cumin: protection, love, fertility, banishing

Cayenne: strength, curses, protection, heartbreak, curse breaking, love

Dandelion: wishes, dreams, psychic ability, lunar magic

Dill: dreams, money, protection, luck, love

Eucalyptus: energy, healing, cleansing, protection

Elderberry: healing, protection, blessing, banishing, cursing, cleansing

Fennel: divination, concentration, energy, meditation, fertility, confidence

Ginseng: love, fertility, beauty, healing, strength

Ginger: energy, speeding things along, passion, travel, healing

Garlic: healing, curses, curse breaking, lunar magic, protection, energy, protection, luck

Holly: dreams, luck, banishing, spirit work, protection, beauty

Juniper: cleansing, fertility, curse breaking, psychic ability, protection

Lavender: calmness, cleansing, love, happiness, fertility

Lemon Balm: cleansing, confidence, overcoming challenges, relaxation

Lemongrass: psychic ability, divination, cleansing, communication, protection, love, luck, jobs

Magnolia: love, fertility, meditation, psychic ability, healing, strength

Mint: communication, energy, money, spirit work, cleansing

Marjoram: protection, happiness, banishing, cleansing

Marigold: love, protection, peace, femininity, comfort

Mugwort: healing, divination, astral projection, dreams, psychic ability, cleansing, protection

Nettle: spirit work, protection, curse breaking

Nutmeg: luck, travel, love, meditation, psychic ability, money

Olive leaf: healing, luck, protection, cleansing, fertility, offerings, blessings

Oregano: happiness, peace, luck, protection, healing, general health, letting go of the past

Peppermint: healing, cleansing, sleep, love, money

Parsley: protection, communication, spirit work, passion

Paprika: spell work, energy, psychic ability, curses, creativity

Pepper (Black): curses, curse breaking, banishing, spirit work, jealousy, absorption of negativity

Raspberry leaf: fertility, femininity, menstrual cycle, lunar magic, love, creativity, protection

Rosemary: cleansing, curse breaking, blessing, healing, fertility, psychic ability, past lives, dreams, marriage

Rose: love, fertility, femininity, protection, marriage, self love

Sage: cleansing, protection, spirit work, smoke cleansing, wisdom, wishes, funerals

Saffron: healing, offerings, wealth, strength, blessing, cleansing, psychic ability, sleep

Spirulina: power, strength, health, luck

St. John’s Wort: cleansing, blessing, offerings, spirit work

Thyme: dreams, sleep, strength, confidence, leaving the past behind you, moving forward, health, healing, fae

Tarragon: luck, calmness, secrets, peace, love, protection, meditation, spirit work

Valerian: spirit work, absorption of negativity, protection, self acceptance

Wheatgrass: cleansing, protection, blessing

Ylang Ylang: beauty, love, luck, happiness, relationships

Yarrow: love, divination, dreams, psychic ability, marriage, courage, communication, focus

Not all of these herbs are edible or safe in some/all circumstances, please do research before eating/using any of the plants listed here!