SAM'S TOWN.

pulls me in enough to keep me guessing

[ftjunho-blog]

SMS / alien rat

sms → alien rat: stop we were having a MOMENT stop making it sleazy

sms → alien rat: [https://66.media.tumblr.com/2d39c296d17d51960a25daf33a6e1020/tumblr_pfn43qAJVG1wjmhfxo1_r1_1280.jpg]

sms → alien rat: we're still traveling so i don't look pretty yet but >w< aaaaahhhh i just wanna come home

sms → alien rat: again with the greasy lines you're lucky you're my favorite :// my heart desires to touch it a lot it also really really wants to hold your hand

sms → alien rat: STOP!!! i'm blushing.........this isn't fair, i'm sad now 🤧

sms → alien rat: what are you up to today?? maybe you can sneak out and come to our meet and greet 😔 and then we won't have to miss each other so much

sms → alien rat: stoppp i'm fading ):

sms → ladybug: what'd i do? did i embarrass you? are your members around?

sms → ladybug: you look so cute i could eat you up 🍴 how is my girlfriend this pretty, huh?? you're always pretty

sms → ladybug: i'm YOUR favorite? what are the odds, you're my favorite too??? AND i wanna hold your hand too????

sms → ladybug: my only plans today are sitting here thinking about how much i miss you

sms → ladybug: but really we've just been polishing up this album

sms → ladybug: huh maybe i should come visit you and serenade you in front of all your fans

sms → ladybug: they might like you a lot, but i definitely like you the most ❤️

[ftjunho-blog]

SMS / alien rat

sms → alien rat: WAAAH~~ KAKASHI OPPA >w

sms → alien rat: you look so cool oppa i could cry!!!! tell me it's still soft and healthy~~ it looks so~~ good ㅠㅠ

sms → alien rat: i miss you too 😔😔😔 i hope your scalp is okay i wish i could be done now so we could hang out and i could see it in person 😔😔😔 just in case i'm just biased and it actually looks dumb

sms → alien rat: yah, idiot, honestly if you had done this earlier we could've gone as kakashi and idk tenten or something!!!!!!!!!! ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

sms → ladybug: i don't know, why don't you come here and see for yourself 😉

sms → ladybug: oh yeah send me a pic of you i miss your adorable little face

sms → ladybug: sorry baby when your schedule frees up i'll make it up to you

sms → ladybug: you can touch it as much as your heart desires

sms → ladybug: i feel like i haven't seen you in so long my life force is starting to deplete..... eunju..... help 😔😔 save me princess

[ftjunho-blog]

RUN FOR COVER,

[ftjunho-blog]

ftsuhee‌:

the smile drops from her face in an instant when she sees a familiar face in the wings, her gaze turning icy. but she’s made a promise to herself, a post-debut promise to be a better person in this new chapter of her life. let go of past grudges and annoyances, if only to make room for new ones. 

time to make good on her word.

“ i’m not catwoman. ”

oh. 

“ i’m not some kind of comic book nerd. i’m just a cat. ” 

maybe she shouldn’t have expected to be able to change herself so quickly. maybe letting go of minor things would be easier, like that time that horse faced girl thought they were equally as good looking. not things like messed up dads. maybe not new things either, like a cousin she never knew she had         though that one she wasn’t all that sure she was angry about so much as confused with. 

definitely not ex-boyfriends, especially not when she’s standing backstage staring one in the face and they’re both dressed like they’re rogue cast members of andrew lloyd webber’s cats.

“ and what are you? something dorky? what’s with the little bell? ”  she raises one brow, hands coming to rest on her hips. it’s as close to nice as she can get. it isn’t that she particularly wants to be mean either, it’s simply a defense mechanism, telling her that when she doesn’t know how to act, this is the right port of call. 

maybe he should’ve expected this to come from trying with suhee — nothing ever came easy, not even a simple gesture to get a conversation going. junho didn’t ever wish anything bad on her, that sort of malice and pettiness didn’t run in his blood; they’d been through enough. 

he sees the drop in her face, feels the mood instantly shift. he couldn’t admit that he was surprised by the manner she’d chosen to respond to such a comment, an observation of her attire — but again, he had to remind himself, this was suhee. he should know by now to expect the unexpected. “oh,” his own pleasant demeanor falters momentarily, the abrasiveness of her retort catching him off guard. he’d had his guitar slung over his shoulder, unplugged but still an odd contrast to his own costume; he shifts then, realizing the unintentional similarities between what they’d both been wearing.

“no,” he furrows his brows and strums his unplugged bass, figuring if this was how he’d have to spend the last few minutes before his band was to perform, he might as well do some practicing. he wants to comment about how she hasn’t changed a bit, but sets that aside. it’s then he wonders if the rest of the girls in her group have had to put up with the same attitude he’d grown so accustom to. “it’s a character from a french show. eunju’s ladybug and i’m cat noir,” he reaches for his phone on the table to scroll his camera roll and pull up a picture the couple had taken in secret earlier. he keeps the picture up just a little too long, gazing down at it before turning the screen off. 

he strums another one of the band’s setlist songs, singing quietly under his breath. “it looks better when the two of us are next to each other.” the rest of the room appears to move through the motions like a normal, a few of melody’s members drifting over to their corner to greet junho with bows before hustling away. the melody he plays transforms from one of strings’ songs to melody’s debut song in hopes the sourpuss looking face suhee has been giving him finally breaks.

[kiim1800]

Visit Original Link

[jaesbean]

[ftjunho-blog]

SMILE LIKE YOU MEAN IT,

[ftjunho-blog]

nasangft‌:

“some,” he replies vaguely, “you?” he doesn’t actually give junho the time to reply, feigning a longer, more obvious look before continuing. “you’ve been…. out, haven’t you?” he puts an emphasis on ‘out’ that’s curious, not chiding. “if you have,” he pulls a teasing smile onto his face, now, “maybe you can use some of that as inspiration and help me? i’m trying to write a song.”

sometimes life spent living with nasang felt like a cat and mouse game; junho never doubted the younger male with anything, and he was a smart enough man himself to know he would never be the one to outsmart the other. he wasn’t tactile, too out of touch with people his age to try and be cunning, that was left to his younger group mates with whom he’d given up his facades.

when he looks at his younger member, he doesn’t see disdain or mistrust; the fact that nasang never showed signs of discouraging junho from seeing his girlfriend was all the more reason to keep up the habit. it really was something he needed to stop doing, he’d been telling himself for months that the band was his primary focus — not eunju — but as the year went on and junho failed to have anyone to slap his wrist and tell him this wasn’t only about him, things stayed the same. 

there would be a time, he figured, that he would be too reckless with his decisions, too careless of the repercussions that could come from abusing his power as a leader. still, as long as nobody advised him against it, junho had no will to stop what made him the happiest.

“i — yeah,” he’s cut short, and feels himself sink lower into the couch’s confines. nasang’s words suddenly bring upon an abrupt need for junho to cough, somewhat taken off guard; he wishes he hadn’t taken off his jacket in order to better hide the small hickey left on the skin just between his neck and shoulder. it hadn’t looked big enough to cover with makeup before he’d arrived home, but now, it felt like the most prominent thing on his entire body.

he swallows hard, hands together, staring at the floor. guilty as charged. “depends,” junho tries to talk his way around the subject, the clear fact that he’d spent absolutely none of his day working on any sort of music aside from the sounds that had come from eunju’s own mouth nearly written across his forehead. his gaze falters between the floor and back to nasang, finding enough willpower to look him in the eyes like a man. perhaps he really was letting his priorities slip too far. “what have you got so far?”

[ftzone]

So I was watching Junho on vlive and I think… I noticed a box of condoms in his room in the background… ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ Nobody else has posted anything about this?? Do you think it’s because picks are in denial of the fact that Junho could have a girlfriend??? ㅋㅋㅋㅋ I zoomed in on the box and they’re king size~~ ㅎㅎㅎ Junho oppa, whoever you bought these for, I hope she’s satisfied~~

[kwon_junho_peless02]: Are you trying to make a scandal for STRINGS?? Don’t you remember what happened to MYSTERY when a fan spotted condoms in one of their member’s rooms… ㅠㅠ f*ck off, I bet you’re not even a pick ㅗ          [c0rps3p4rty]: @[kwon_junho_peless02] ㅋ the public has to actually pay attention to STRINGS first before something like this could turn into a scandal         [kwon_junho_peless02]: @[c0rps3p4rty] You ouijas are more crazy than I thought if you actually think Corpse Party is any more popular than STRINGS… ㅋ the public really doesn’t care about either of them ㅠㅠ [SHOOT_ME]: This is so fake…         [korainyweather]: @[SHOOT_ME] Do you really think idols are all celibate?? ㅋㅋㅋㅋ I bet you’re jealous [JUNSANG]: Maybe it’s another idol… like Nasang~~~           [libra_strings]: @[JUNSANG] You shippers are so creepy wtf          [JUNGSANG]: @[libra_strings] f*ck you, hypocrite ㅗ ㅗ I saw your theory post about the STRINGS and libra members dating… 

                                           ( load more comments / @ftjunho )

[ftjunho-blog]

LIFE TO COME,

                                                                                have a little faith in me                                                                         just drop kick the shame @ftjiae​

                                                                             ( HONGDAE, DEC. 2013 )

seoul is a brutal, merciless place, and in more ways than just one. wintertime in the city is nothing to be taken lightly; junho had learned from the one day he was sure he could last busking in below zero degree celsius weather in late december without a heavy jacket — to which his experience with only busan and las vegas weather clearly lead his sense of judgmental askew. he looks back and recalls how detrimental that day felt when he had to race back to his friend’s apartment from hongdae to get his only winter coat and feared that any moment spent away from the neighborhood would jeopardize his chances of being noticed by some sort of talent scouter. 

he was new to the city, only a few months in but still feeling like the city’s biggest outsider. english was still fairly fresh in his mind at the time, a plus for those foreigners who came to visit hongdae to watch all the street performers. his language skill made him different, set him apart from everybody else who avoided interacting with the public at all costs; junho found it easy, more comfortable for him, even. he didn’t like the idea of closing people off: you never know where people came from, or better, who they knew. he was never quick to judge.

some days, though, the weather was just too brisk to stay out too long. his roommate had advised junho against more than a few hours at a time if the guitarist really insisted on staying out. he was a product of the south, of mild winters where snowfall wasn’t as frequent as it was in seoul, but junho was still determined, even in a blizzard, to make his dedication a statement.

when the streets start to empty because of the accumulating snowfall, junho decides maybe he shouldn’t let himself die of hypothermia today, either. he moves to seek refuge from the cold in jiae’s family’s convenience store, bowing as the bell above the door chimes.

“i don’t know how seoul people do it,” junho muses once he’s gathered some things; extra spicy ramyeon, a hot cup of black coffee, banana milk and an egg sandwich. none of it is cohesive, much like junho’s life at the moment, and he sets it all down on the counter with a light sigh. some excess snowflakes fall from his beanie as he takes it off to run a hand through his hair, his cheeks still tinted pink from the harsh wind. “it’s nuts. i don’t get how people can deal, nonetheless enjoy this kind of weather.”

[ftjunho-blog]

RUN FOR COVER,

                                   what are you waiting for, a kiss or an apology?                                   you think by now you’d have an A in toxicology                                                                                       @ftsuhee​

the last time junho had seen suhee was, well, junho can’t remember — most of his memories with her consisted of the latter days of their relationship; the ones that called for more disagreements and divides than healthy communication or discussion. the two of them were water and oil personified, the two of them struggling to mix no matter how hard they tried. they were complex in their own ways, suhee and her family and junho and his broken inner compass that led him astray, off to a foreign land with neon lights and slot machines that painted them black and white. 

while they were together it felt too short, once they parted ways, it felt too long. it was a tumultuous barely-half year that left them with hands of heavy baggage and discovery. in that time junho had come to learn about how suhee had built a mental and emotional barrier around herself that made it so, so difficult to get in. 

it didn’t make their break up any easier, either.

junho knew her time would come sooner than later. he didn’t know, however, that her company would debut her with such specific timing that it fell into step with lotte’s halloween concert and adding melody to their starting lineup, even before his own group. there was no time to see her perform on stage, but he could hear suhee’s voice from the speakers, all too familiar for ears that hadn’t heard from her in some time.

he’s seated in the waiting room when suddenly, the door opens and her group is ushered in. it’s only for a few moments, a coordinator lets them know, until the other band is finished; it’s too much time, junho thinks immediately the moment he locks gazes with suhee — this probably won’t turn out well. at all.

“nice catwoman costume,” junho tries to find some sort of small talk to filter the heavy air between them once all of the awkward, formal introductions and greetings are made between the groups and they’re left to their own devices. nobody knows of their past except them, so he tries to keep the subject light, fluid. “it, uh, suits you.”

[ftjunho-blog]

SMILE LIKE YOU MEAN IT,

                                                               save some face, you know you've only got one                                                            change your ways while you're young @nasangft​

it’s starting to get bad. 

junho comes home later than he has in the past, his manager never thinking to question him because leaders are supposed to be busy and out of the dorms often. strings’ light schedules make sneaking out easy, almost like taking candy from a baby; he’s perfected his lies that his debut self would shun him for making. i got caught up writing lyrics at a cafe has become his recent go to following his continuous rendezvous with eunju that, contrary to his white lies, have not consisted of any variety of musical composition. 

but he does begin to return home happier with more pep in his step, which is also somewhat odd for a boy who is supposed to be stressed out over maintaining his group. he’s growing careless of his actions and he knows it in the back of his mind, but refuses to take off the rose-colored lenses and snap out of this irresponsible, lovesick pit of quicksand he’s gotten himself stuck inside. it’s doing more harm than good to his group — re-arranging his priorities that he’d been so confident were in order before. 

it’s past ten when he arrives back to his dorm, not the latest he’s returned home, but not so early, either. his members tell him that their manager has run out to the convenience store to grab a few things and would be back in awhile; junho assumes he’s probably going to take his time drinking a bottle of soju outside (and he doesn’t blame him, the man has unknowingly had to pick up much of junho’s slack these days). most of them know why he hadn’t been back hours earlier but don’t bring it up — they’re all fully aware of where he really was. 

“hey,” junho grunts after he’s taken off his jacket and draped it over the arm of the couch that nasang lays on the opposite side of, sitting himself down with a slight huff of air. truthfully he feels somewhat incompetent asking his members these sort of questions, because he knows he should be there to participate in the first place. “you get much work done today?”

[ftjunho-blog]

                 FRIGHT FEST  eunju & junho as miraculous’ ladybug & cat noir 🐞             “ ahhhh, ladybug, isn’t this cozy? just the two of us? what could this lead to? ”

[ftjunho-blog]

MISS ATOMIC BOMB,

[ftjunho-blog]

fteunju‌:

“just tonight?” she teases, grin still in place. the feeling is mutual - eunju’s affectionate even on the worst of days, revels in skin-on-skin contact and the warmth of junho by her side. she’d spent the better half of this outing having to stop herself from reaching for his hand, from tucking herself under his arm, sticking her fingers in his belt loops to pull him closer just because. she glances briefly over her shoulder before looking at him again. “what are we playing for here? i need to know what’s at stake before i beat you anyway.” she takes a moment to ‘step’ through their options, settling on dream a dream. her favorite. “loser has to hold my hand? loser has to give me a kiss for every point i win over them? loser buys frozen yogurt? it’s endless.”

having their own private space, time to just themselves, junho doesn’t realize how much they’d subconsciously been censoring themselves at the company. it was as if there was a constant invisible wall between them, one that demanded both of them on their best behaviors in front of their seniors, their staff, anyone who wasn’t already in the know about their not so little secret. junho had already passed his time of a dating ban, and it wasn’t like their ceo would ever severely punish him if he did; rather, that punishment and retribution would be put on eunju’s shoulders instead. libra truly was joonyoung’s only hope for a sign of success for the company, and knowing how much effort he put into crafting the girls into everything strings couldn’t be, this relationship — for not just their own sakes, but their company’s sake, too — was better off left unspoken.

sometimes junho feels his face warm when she teases him, the butterflies that fly around in his stomach never really settling when she finds something, anything to poke fun at him with. he loves it when she does because they’ve both grown so tired of playing the sunbae-hoobae cat and mouse game in front of everyone who is too oblivious to catch any of their lingering stares, their side glances, the adoration in their eyes when they catch the other in passing. “ow,” he laughs, half amused by how bold she is and the other just from being a wuss. she’s not wrong, not with anything she has to say about him — junho really does bend to her every whim, even if it means dropping something of somewhat decent importance for something she wants. 

he’s just a sucker. and if no one else is around, he would’ve already been all over her.

even after months of dating in secret, countless encounters pretending to be nothing more than just label mates when the situation called for it, there were still times, like these, he felt looking at her so carefree, without her makeup, or in costume, or at dress rehearsals when she couldn’t talk, or even the nights she was so burnt out from her schedule that junho knew her missed calls — just oh eunju herself — it felt like day one all over again. and again.

he grins, lets her have her say as he leans back on the railing to buffer them from behind. “no red alert this time?” they’ve already begun to create their own playlist, titled, if anything, ddr songs for eunju to kick junho’s ass in. he makes a mental note to buy her a game for christmas. junho leans in close to her, too close that it almost feels personal, and playfully reaches his foot over to her mat to press her level up to expert. “if those are the only punishments? then losing doesn’t sound too bad.” it’s a fact: junho has never won against eunju once in dance dance revolution, but with the perks that come from being eunju’s loser, he doesn’t have plans of winning anytime soon.

[marcalainlove-deactivated202101]

Visit Original Link

 "Til I Gain Control Again" Emmylou Harris

[fyeah-dowoon]

[ftjunho-blog]

MISS ATOMIC BOMB,

[ftjunho-blog]

fteunju‌:

“i love dance dance revolution, i used to play it all the time - i was the local champ in busan,” she says in reply, already knows that he knows, but plays along nonetheless. the mask on her face serves as a decent cover to the grin that lifts her cheeks but she’s sure her eyes give her away when she stops being careful and meets his gaze head on. “i could probably even show you a few killing moves to use on stage with your band, if you’d like, junho-ssi.”

their game of charades, playing pretend of the people expect them to be — strangers, two people of the industry who aren’t meant to be close; paths never meant to cross and every force to exist working against them. it pulls them apart like magnets that come so close but never touch, it’s fun for the short time, pretending to be only friendly acquaintances and nothing more. but how long could they keep this act up for before it would inevitably grow old, fabricated, unbelievable?

if they were magnets, it would be hard to hide the blatant attraction that pulls them together every time. the arcade is expectedly crowded for a friday night, nothing too surprising; but junho still finds himself bumping into her side as he always does when there’s no one else around. he puts his hands back into his sweatshirt pockets to consciously force himself not to put his hands anywhere near her, not to let himself slip and reach for her hand.

junho isn’t a good actor, and his questions remain short, vague to mask his lack of skill at the art. “yeah? how did that happen?” every question is just a filler until they make it out of earshot from her group of friends that one last crane of his head back tells them that nobody has even noticed they’ve wandered off. the machine in front of them blares its sample music and lights at them, a perfect volume to drown out their actual conversation. “they didn’t even notice we walked away,” junho comments, finally breaking character to smile at her as he steps up onto the dance mat and leans against the bar to let her browse through the songs list.

“junho-ssi,” he reaches a hand out of his pocket to playfully poke her side, laughing. “were you that formal with me when we first met?” maybe it was because he was half of the guilty party hiding their relationship from the rest of the world that junho was sure someone was bound to question their interactions at some point. there was always the glint of something more than sparkled in both their eyes when they looked at one another, and there was no way that couldn’t be obvious to anyone else. it’s exactly why meeting in an arcade of all public places made the most sense: dark, loud with bright lights to dim that glimmer just enough to reduce them both to cordial, erases the romance that was clearly there if you looked hard enough.

he looks at her again, his lovesick grin foolishly stuck on his face. “you look cute tonight,” he wants to give her a kiss, just a quick peck to get it out of his system — he’s itching for it, jonesing for just one worse than a smoker without any cigarettes. “i wanted to tell you earlier.”

[ftzone]

There, I said it ㅜㅜ I’m prepared for anti-fans to swarm this post, okay? But he really is so perfect!! I mean, most idol guys are handsome, right? But he’s really something else~ I watched a video on YouTube, you know, and they found out that he’s almost perfectly symmetrical - your oppas really can’t compete I’m sorry ㅜㅜ but have you seen the video for Shoot Me?? I Wait??  ㅎㅎ calling any other guy a visual in kpop these days is a joke ㅎㅎ

He writes so well too  ㅜㅜ ㅜㅜ  ㅜㅜ  ㅜㅜ and he’s so light-hearted ㅜㅜ It makes me upset how underrated STRINGS are!!!! If more people heard their music, they’d be bigger than NEO~ mark my words ㅎㅎㅎㅎ

[luvNEO]: Maybe it’s because their fans are so obnoxious? get your head out of your ass and do something about it then?? F*cker … everybody knows nobody cares about idol bands, right? Even Corpse Party is better, right? Try dancing.             [love_gurl]: @[luvNEO] please don’t mention corpse party, we want to avoid fanwars…..please…..             [pandora_box]: @[luvNEO] @[love_gurl]  ㅋㅋ ㅋㅋ it’s rich to see a ouija and a trinity pretend to take the moral high ground  ㅋㅋ  get over yourselves, you’re the worst of all [kwon_junho_peless02]: the only antis i can think of ruining this post are univibes and multifans ㅋ Anyway, he really is my ideal type~ it hurts my heart to think about  ㅠ_ㅠ  he makes my life so hard             [critical_beautylina]: @[kwon_junho_peless02] do you ever shut the f*ck up? keep univibes out of your mouth, loser. sit down and eat your stale ballads and leave the rest of us alone [libra_Eveju]: oppa~ why are you so talented~? leave some for the rest of us, okay? It’s easier to live because he has a big forehead…my handsome oppa~~~

                                           ( load more comments / @ftjunho )

[ftjunho-blog]

MISS ATOMIC BOMB,

                                                         and for a second there we’d won                                                          yeah, we were innocent and young                                                                                                   @fteunju​

there’s only a few things junho can appreciate from being from a group that isn’t constantly bombarded with overwhelming fans, and arguably the greatest thing to go along with it is his freedom of mobility. how the other more well-known idols of the industry manage to get around a city of ten million without a constant trail of fans lingering behind is beyond him — he likes still being classified as somewhat normal. sure, there are the occasions when someone will recognize him on the street, but those are rare, and most often only result in a few pictures from afar that are only posted to fan club blogs.

but he feels some pressure now, being invited out for some food and time at an arcade with jackrabbit entertainment artists that include: eunju. it’s a challenge not to let himself seem too obvious, sneaking glances, standing too close when the situation doesn’t call for it. junho has grown far too physically attracted to her in the privacy of their own time that  now is their first test keeping things lowkey in the public eye — literally. so to play the part, junho dresses himself as casually as possible: hoodie, jeans, vans and a face mask to keep the attention off himself not just within the group, but to the strangers around him as well. fan rumors leaking to the executives at his company wouldn’t just be bad for their images as a whole, but detrimental to their relationship as well.

they play along with the whole charade of not being familiar with one another, using formalities whenever they had to around the other trainees. the group gathers around an air hockey table for some time before one of the trainees triumphantly throws his fists up into the air when he beats his friend, 5-4. at first it’s an organized, cohesive group one moment, and the next, slowly tapers off in different directions to play their own games in pairs or smaller groups. he tries to make it look like a casual thing, discreetly making his way next to eunju, half of her bare face saturated in neon lighting.

“so — what do you want to play?” it’s short and formal, but the connotation holds more than just its meaning at face value. nobody seems to be in direct earshot of their conversation, and despite how normal everything probably seems from the outside looking in, there’s no saying who around them might really be listening.

there’s a dance dance revolution machine tucked far in the corner, to his own slight disbelief, untouched by any patrons. he gestures to it, already knows that she loves the game down to her favorite song that they’ve spoken about before, knows her answer even before he asks in order to keep up their facade. his eyes try not to sparkle too brightly when he looks her in the eye. it’s not even really so much a question, rather, a suggestion to get away from everybody else. “how about dance dance revolution?”