FUCK YOU DILBERT @fuckyoudilbert - Tumblr Blog

CRITICS ARE RAVING ABOUT FUCKYOUDILBERT

“Doing better than bitcoin, baby” -@ps2polpo

“You can’t be saying that, white puppy” -@aureliagaming

“Wondrous” -@zeitghost

"I've been pretending to be the fuckyoudilbert author when I go to bars and every woman within a 20 foot radius wants to fuck me to death. I'm afraid of the day when this delicate tower of lies topples over." -Gabri Lovecraft

“Truly the greatest piece of writing and creative work of our generation” -New York Times #1 Bestselling Author Stephen King

“Don’t eat the dilberito… they put something in it, t-to make you forget” -Male_08 from Half-Life 2

“Get out of my house” -Dilbert

Fuckyoudilbert has swept the blogging world by storm, which is what I would say if I was a liar, which I’m not. Everything I say on this blog is factually correct, and there’s not a single thing Scott Adams can do about it.

I started this blog when my real-live actual brother gifted me a daily Dilbert comic calendar as a joke for Christmas, and my hatred for the bastard in the striped tie has only grown since that day.

When I reached out to Scott Adams for any comments on fuckyoudilbert while wearing a pair of Groucho Marx glasses and a newsboy cap that I got at Spirit Halloween, all he had to say was this:

“My pronouns? Are Dil/bert.”

And then he smugly crossed his arms and made an absolutely insufferable expression, as if he had just epicly owned me and was waiting for the Reddit karma to roll in. I, unable to take this shit anymore, just walked away as he kept repeating the joke and asking if I heard him. After I had walked far enough away for him to not be able to see me anymore (where he started saying “Hey! Where’d you go?” over and over), I made it back safely to my home where Scott Adams couldn’t get me, and then immediately began work on the digital era of fuckyoudilbert.

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For the latest and greatest in fuckyoudilbert, look at the #digital era tag

For the original run of fuckyoudilbert that didn’t last very long, look at #calendar era

For quick n' dirty comics usually added via reblogs to pre-existing fuckyoudilbert posts, look at #dilbert fodder

For comics edited or written by someone that isn't me, look at #guest comic

For any posts that aren’t Dilbert edits, look at #not an edit

For asks, look at #asks

And finally, for submissions, take a look at #submissions

#digital era #calendar era #not an edit #asks #submissions #dilbert fodder #guest comic

have you tried the dilberito yet? i kinda... i kinda want one. it kinda looks good. why. help.

apparently it would make you fart so hard it physically hurt i dont think itd be worth it. especially since the last dilberito is in captivity and is close to expiring

APPARENTLY HITLER WAS IN THE HARAMBE HEAVEN IMAGE MEME I TOOK AND ADDED SCOTT ADAMS TO AND I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA

#not an edit

karvina

as of today every dilbert comic has disappeared. web archives are empty. books are purged of their contents and automatically transported to municipal recycling facilities, or else under the legs of crooked tables. old newspapers across the world, even those sealed within papier-mâché, shudder gently as the ink comprising dilbert is quantum tunneled away. the faint imprints of sunday strips impressed in silly putty are erased molecule by molecule from within their decades-abandoned plastic containers. a man in St. Louis weeps with joy upon noticing his ugly as fuck dilbert tattoo is gone, but after a minute or two he has forgotten it ever existed, and is roused by the arrival of the very girlfriend who had broken up with him six years ago for getting a dilbert tat right above his dick. the last remaining dilberito vanishes from its hermetically sealed vault. the world itself is lightened. You cant read dilbert anymore. It's gone.

in my minds eye im imagining the blank room soup video but with two people in dilbert mascot suits making someone eat a dilberito

#not an edit

this is like your own personal opposite of 9/11

i feel more melancholy about this than i do 9/11 mostly because what the hell do i do now

#asks #not an edit

im not sure where to go from here ill be honest. if this blog had been far more consistent prior to scott adams death then i think the tribute amv would have been the perfect end point but i feel like i have a duty to keep going. and now that my rival isnt here anymore i dont know what to do

#not an edit

my video tribute to dilbert and scott adams

#dilbert #fuck you dilbert #fuckyoudilbert #digital era #video

2560x1440

in honor of his passing the newly renamed Scott Adams Memorial Cafeteria will be serving this disgusting shit until 6pm tonight

#not an edit

3liza

#not an edit

You came back and he died. Your improvements to the comics did him in. Good job.

but with him gone i feel lost and without purpose

#asks #not an edit

fuckyoudilbert

cowdogpaws

the new norm twitter account consistently has the energy of a child's deviantart page where they take a png of their favorite character and pastes it on every possible image they can think of

#not an edit