No matter what I do, I don’t feel welcome anywhere, and I can’t convince myself otherwise. This story and my OCs feel like a big waste of time, like people only pay attention to them when I start throwing a fit and they decide to acknowledge me out of pity.
It wasn’t always like this, though???but those people that used to message me about this stuff are gone now, and I don’t know what to do anymore. I never had to seek them out; they always came to me when I needed that bit of positivity, but they’re just...gone now.
I know, deep down, that there are people that actually care. It just seems like, whenever I try to put myself out there, I get absolutely nothing in return. I say I can get to drafts and people respond to me, but as soon as I try to get other things going, no one responds to me.
I’m exhausted. I’m emotionally and mentally exhausted. I haven’t made a single friend in school, and I’m starting to regret going into a Theatre major to begin with. Everyone already has their little cliques, and people hardly talk to me before they decide talking to their actual friends is more worth it than wasting their time with my anxious ass.
I thought this was my calling.
I thought I finally figured it out.
But no one will even give me a chance.
So...yeah; I think I’ll take that break. I’ll be back either Halloween or November 1st with my NaNoWriMo queue.
I don’t know what’ll happen after that, though. I don’t want to leave, but the feeling is just so...overwhelming. And it never seems to go away for that long. ))
anyone who has spent five seconds around me ever: yes, you love NaNoWriMo, we know, you love NaNoWriMo so much, it's the light of your life, you love it so much, you just love NaNoWriMo, we KNOW, you love NaNoWriMo you fucking love NaNoWriMo ok we know, we get it, YOU LOVE NANOWRIMO. WE GET IT.
origamiaround
ellievsbear
tangentwithtanner
