i'm supposed to be retired @futureadapted - Tumblr Blog

private & highly selective narrative exploration of five hargreeves. primary influence is drawn from netflix’s the umbrella academy, no comic influence.

established — 4/1/21, revamped 6/24/22, tracking — futureadapted. low activity & slow reply, please be kind & patient. penned by alex. he / him, 33, pst.

— CARRD will tag s3 spoilers ‘ spoilers / ’ until 7/1/22

#— PINNED

if you listen closely, you can hear the sound of my clown shoes squeaking in the distance. i know i just moved five here again, but.... now he’s moving back over to @ceremonially

#— ooc #i have no excuse for myself #just head over yonder if you'd like

leadranger

❝ there are only three rules. first, you must never use your powers for personal gain. second, you must never escalate a fight, unless your enemy forces you to. third, you must never reveal your identity. nobody can know you are the power rangers. ❞ — affiliated. priv. sel. RED & PINK

#— PROMOTION #— SELF PROMOTION #yes i will rebaggle this everywhere #bc it took forever to make and i'm very proud of it #anyway perceive us #<3

ceremoniallya

i could no longer resist… so uh here’s this : @leadranger

#— OOC #we're going Peak Camp over here people #this is not a drill

capinejghafa

Well, according to Commission Handbook Chapter 27, subsection 3b, the seven stages in paradox psychosis are… stage one: denial, two: itching, three: extreme thirst and urination, four: excessive gas, five: acute paranoia, six: uncontrolled perspiration, and seven: homicidal rage.

#— PORTRAIT #— CHARACTER STUDY #— REFERENCE #never not hilarious

hiding out on @stilctto for now

#— SELF PROMOTION #idk the vibes are off w/ canon #so gave one of my ocs a solo blog

klaushargereves

— What I did today, I did for my family.

#— PORTRAIT #it's the slaughtering a board room full of people with an axe for me

charmed

Lilo & Stitch (2002) dir. Chris Sanders, Dean DeBlois

#— CHARACTER STUDY #i can't see this post w/o thinking about five #so it's going here

amsterdamhotelroom

guys guys reblog with the first song on your upside down playlist i want to know how to save you from vecna

#— OOC #polygraph right now!#by the spill canvas #bc i am forever and always #pop punk trash

❝ well, if this isn't just a cosmic clusterfuck...❞ sweat soaks five's hairline as his eyes narrow, lip curling into something of a snarl as he stares himself down. if there was a commission timeline award for most encounters with paradox psychosis, he'd be a shoe in.

the worst part is — he, himself, didn't know what the hell was going on. which meant he, the other guy, had to be the fuel on this proverbial dumpster fire. ❝ @paradoxcd, spit it out. to what do i owe this abysmal and unfortunate occasion? ❞

#PARADOXCD #— PARADOXCD 001 #— AUV POST S03 #hope this works!#he's always so hostile w/ .. himself lol

❝ — actually, that... is quite interesting, ❞ the surprise in his voice would probably offend some lesser beings, but it's not something he tempers well on the fly. the truth was that the vast majority of people and their various thoughts and opinions were lacking in any type of substance.

the idea of watch and study wasn't foreign, the commission served a similar purpose, though they employed trained assassins to keep things on the rails. a practice he thought heavy handed until things... went off the rails. ❝ a little pervy though @qknows, with the whole liking to watch thing, but interesting. ❞

#QKNOWS #— QKNOWS 001 #— AUV POST S01 #idk what this is syd #but kick me if it doesn't work

nicostiel

#the umbrella dance academy

#— PORTRAIT #— CHARACTER STUDY #— DYN : THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY #i think this was my favorite scene in the whole season #now listening to the dirty dancing soundtrack #tua spoilers /

blogroll, aka: places alex may be found in the wilds of the rpc.

@futureadapted — primary muse, high activity / slow replies @mckkari — secondary muse, medium activity / slow replies @ceremonially — multi-muse, sporadic activity / periodic replies disco - the perfect instrument#0575

#— OOC #— SELF PROMOTION #mutuals only and lmk who u are #also when i say high activity i'm grading on the alex curve so #nobody @ me

aestheticbroker

— ❛❛ // 𝚈𝙾𝚄𝚃𝙷𝚂 ! ( shit that schmidt has said from the television show, new girl. please substitute pronouns as needed.)

❛ pine has no place in this loft. it’s the wood of poor people and outhouses. ❜ ❛ are you cooking a frittata in a sauce pan ? what is this prison ? ❜ ❛ know this : your caveman ideas about manhood are so over. manhood today is about exfoliation, cheese courses, emotional honesty and paxil. ❜ ❛ guess whose personalized condoms just arrived ! ❜ ❛ we’re broenemies. he’s my fremesis. ❜ ❛ can we just take a moment to celebrate me ? ❜ ❛ damn it ! i can’t find my driving moccasins anywhere. ❜ ❛ ___ is delicate. like a flower. like a chubby, damaged flower who hates himself. ❜ ❛ i can’t talk right now. i’m writing a strongly worded email to my florist. ❜ ❛ i’m gonna have to run all the way home and i have my slipperiest loafers on. ❜ ❛ can you please get my towel ? it’s in my room next to my irish walking cape. ❜ ❛ bathtubs are medieval filth cauldrons. ❜ ❛ you have found my flabbergast button, and guess what ? you’ve pressed it. ❜ ❛ it’s like you’re ripping the side block out of my mental jenga ! i’m totally falling apart. ❜ ❛ it makes me angry and scared all the same time. just like when i hear the phrase ‘ academy aware winner anna paquin. ‘ ❜ ❛ man to man, you didn’t wanna wear something, i dunno, a little more form-flattering ? you know, like a pile of towels ? the number eight ? ❜ ❛ you’re listening to the radio and writing with a pen. what decade are we in ? ❜ ❛ walk with dignity, you giant toddler ! ❜ ❛ do you just walk around all day thinking about other people’s feelings ? how do you get anything done ? ❜ ❛ she has a flip phone ! she’s either poor or a time traveller. ❜ ❛ if you’ll excuse me, i have to go water my succulents. ❜ ❛ without ash to rise from, the phoenix would just be a bird getting up. ❜ ❛ now, as my best friend, i expect you to be willing to sacrifice everything for me at a moment’s notice including, of course, unfortunately for you, your dignity. ❜ ❛ you were denied a cell phone because you have the credit score of a homeless ghost ! ❜ ❛ where do you even buy sheets like this ? they have the thread count of a paper towel. ❜ ❛ they don’t hate me because i’m old, they hate me because of my personality. ❜ ❛ hey, m. night shyamalan. i’ve got a twist ending for you : shut up ! ❜ ❛ back in high school, they used to call me ‘ the sex haver’. ❜ ❛ my whole life is you. ❜ ❛ ARE YOU A CRIMINAL ?! FROM THE STATISTICS ? ❜ ❛ i look like a 70′s divorce attorney. ❜ ❛ i simply want a demographic breakdown of all the guys who hit on you. ❜ ❛ i’m like a sexual snowflake. each night with me is a unique experience. ❜

#— PROMPTS #the time traveler line slays me #but ok send me things for after work