i no longer remember

mostly a mix of sport and theatre content | Juventina | feral on race weekends and match days | obsessed with 2 warehouses in Woolwich

[6menezes]

“The House of Asterion”:

“Everything is repeated many times, fourteen times, but two things in the world seem to be repeated only once: above, the intricate sun; below Asterion. Perhaps I have created the stars and the sun and this enormous house, but I no longer remember.”

[gardenofadonis]

Taylor Fritz may be the only American ATP player who suffers like a protagonist in 19th century Russian novels

[gardenofadonis]

supposed to be working on my research chapter due in 5h but I'm crying to Ian Bostridge and Julius Drake's Winterreise I hate it here

[gardenofadonis]

Random Le Nozze di Figaro fact: L'ho perduta is the only aria in a minor key in the whole opera. Even the Countess's depression arias were in major keys. But my girl Barbarina gets her aria in F minor.

Christian Schubart wrote in 1806 that F minor indicates 'Deep depression, funereal lament, groans of misery and longing for the grave.'

Yes, on paper the aria is simply about her trying to find a pin she lost, but if you think about it musically there's a lot more under the surface. When I was reheasing for the role, my music director specifically told me I shouldn't act panicky, because that's not what F minor key is about. If you look at Schubart, F minor is the most gloomy and depressing key out of all key signatures. You can even go as far as saying it's as close as suicidal as can be. Now, why would something as insignificant as a pin send her into something that warrants a F minor key? What things are hidden from us that made losing a pin into the straw that breaks a camel's back?

(incoming long post about Barbarina, tw: discussion about pedophilia, grooming, and underage sex)

Before Act 4, we only see Barbarina as a cheerful, smart, and happy-go-lucky girl. And we only see her or hear about her in scenarios where she wasn't alone. L'ho perduta is the first time we see her by herself. Can we infer that her cheerfulness is a mask? And when she's alone that's when she's truly herself?

If we look at her story. She's the daughter of an alcoholic gardener in a feudal system, the lowest of the low in terms of social standings. She grew up in this system where even her body doesn't belong to her (the Count only abolished the feudal right to sleep with virgins after he married the Countess a few years before Nozze took place). Both men she's romantically/sexually involved with do not respect her (the Count is married and 'loves' Susanna; Cherubino is obsessed with the Countess and lusts after every woman he meets). They only use her because she's available. And she lets them, without appearing to be offended or upset, either because she has no choice or she genuinely believes that's all she deserves.

A meta thing to note is that the first actress who portrayed her was only 12, so it's safe to assume she's supposed to be a child more than a woman (a lot of teenage girl characters in operas were played by adult women, so having a 12yr old play her was a deliberate choice to make her a child character).

What's probably more tragic is that she appears to be groomed to think her sexuality is some sort of weapon (probably her only weapon), which we can see in her Act 3 recit with the Count during the wedding. She willingly accepts and welcomes the Count taking sexual advantages from her. When I was preparing for this role I took a lot of inspiration from real-life accounts and fictional works about teenage girls being in love with older men, especially school girls 'loving' their male teachers (such as the protagonist in 'My Dark Vanessa).

One more thing: Why did she want to marry Cherubino, a boy who was low in social status, poor, and was a fuckboy who wasn't devoted to her? Why did she even got Cherubino back to the Castle when he was on his way to join the army? Did she perhaps think she doesn’t deserve a better husband than that? I don't really believe a girl in the 18th century would throw away her future just to save a boy from joining the army. In the Act 4 recit, she had to beg villagers for food to give to Cherubino, which means the Count didn't take Cherubino back onto his staff list after consenting to the marriage; so for all we know, the marriage doesn't mean Cherubino wouldn't go to the army any more.

Lastly, and this is sort of my interpretation: what if she is so desperate to marry because she's pregnant, and she doesn't want the social suicide of mothering a child out of wedlock? (the identity of the father doesn't matter here.) We don’t know if she fucked Cherubino, but I'm 90% certain she had sexual relations with the Count. Here's why:

In Act 1, the Count tells of a story of him visiting Antonio and finding Barbarina there. Unlike other servants, Antonio and Barbarina don't live in the castle, and if the Count wanted to see Antonio he could easily just send someone to call on him instead of going over to his house. Even if he truly wanted to meet Antonio, why would he come in and even go into Barbarina's bedroom after finding out Antonio wasn't there? In my head, the Count went to Antonio's house for Barbarina, which is a private setting far from the prying eyes of the Countess and the staffs in the main house. Antonio probably knows this and let it happen. This is based on him saying 'Brava figliuola, hai buon maestro, che ti fa scuola' (well done daughter, you have a good teacher that teaches you) after hearing Barbarina and the Count's exchange just before the wedding in Act 3. Regardless of whether Antonio is unironically being proud of her or sarcastic about it, the line affirms that he doesn’t see his teen daughter having sexual relations with a married adult before or after this moment as something that needs to be stopped (whether he can stop it is another question, but he doesn’t even try here in an opera that is all about defying the social structure and power dynamics).

Also, this is most likely me bullshitting, but Barbarina tells the Count 'voi mi dite sì spesso qual volta m'abbracciate, e mi baciate' (You've told me so often when you've embraced and kissed me). Spesso (often) is one letter away from sesso (sex). Da Ponte was a very smart writer who knew how to play with words to imply extra meanings in there and was a sexual libertine, so it's not impossible that the similarity between spesso and sesso was intended. Anyway this is probably me overanalysing but that's the fun of these sort of analyses. But regardless, 'm'abbraciate e mi baciate' is very sexually charged, especially during an age where you can't really explicitly say 'fucking' on stage.

Maybe I'll say more in the future but it's 6am here and I need to sleep.

[gardenofadonis]

Life is so shit that I, a soprano, am putting songs from Winterreise into my recital programmes in May

I will be singing about the flowers blossoms in May *in May*, because my soul is in perpetual winter

Also I'll most likely wear a white dress for that recital. not because I'm gonna be a rich bride, but because the men I love don't want me smh

[gardenofadonis]

Can't stop thinking about how in RE2 Remake the first time Ada took of her shades was after Leon took that bullet from Annette Birkin for her (the shades stayed on when she hit the ground so it wasn't an accident), and the first time she took of her gloves was to patch up Leon's bullet wound. She also left her trenchcoat with Leon.

They say the eyes are windows to the soul, so that was probably the moment Ada saw Leon as more than someone she can use for her mission, but someone she genuinely cared about, in spite of herself. Her taking off the shades, gloves, and trenchcoat also symbolise her shedding some of her masks/personae for Leon.

Also, the last thing Leon saw before blacking out was her eyes, for the first time. His first thought after waking up was Ada.

And after that, when Leon and Ada meet up again, she's not all cold and business-like the way she was, but shifted into someone more affectionate and playful.

I didn't love the trenchcoat and shades costume at first but I love how they served a story-telling purpose

[gardenofadonis]

Please let this be true 🙏🙏🙏

[gardenofadonis]

where is latifi when you need him

[gardenofadonis]

we come into the season thinking Kiro is a serious team and this happens (Dan getting punctured by Nyck dive bomb at T1 and mechanics weren't ready for him to pit at all and then worked on the car when it wasn'tin mode 0 so they got a drive through; Pepe aerocrash while with a broken steering problems during count down to FCY, potentially problem with race control not hooked to driver radio)

[gardenofadonis]

GET GOOGLE GEMINI OFF OF MY SCREEN

[gardenofadonis]

mahindra you will pay for your crimes

[gardenofadonis]

my goat in the house

[soineffablygay]

Carlos telling the story of the road trip.

[schumi-nadal]

These two clowns won!!! 🥳

[gardenofadonis]

We were so close to another ex-roommate match up (but Daniil fucked up) so I'm once again thinking about this story and stuck in my feelings, wondering just how much of their lore is hidden unbeknownst to the public

[les4nobody]

I will NOT accept people talking shit about this ✨MASTERPIECE✨ of a Man! This Entertainer! this 8 arms ocean angel! This problematic mouse! It was the most entertaining moment of the match and him blowing kisses to the umpire was just the cherry on top

[gardenofadonis]

I will always support Daniil but goddamn it just gets more and more embarrassing with every passing day.