Young Prince ♛

Jackson Genovese. 23. Manhattan

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

Emily was clueless about his question. “I know she’s really great with Tristan, I also think she’s friendly, now you two are friends or something like that, but could she really hang out with us? Maybe now she could. We don’t party as we used to do and she isn’t exactly a party freak, but she is good, Jack. I’m not saying we aren’t, but on a big scale of things, she’s definitely an angel while we practically belong in hell. Not to mention we are all trying to survive, especially you and your family.” Emily herself didn’t know how it was to live without bodyguards and that would even get bigger in the future; more obligations and duties meant more protection. “I so knew your mother would be a bigger problem, it’s always like that. I’m not even an Italian and I am, well I will be the one who was dating the other member of the family. Juliana will so hate me, Jackson, I just know it. You could help me with that, right?” Emily sheepishly said into the phone before she chuckled to their situation. It was kind of sweet to talk about them in such a way, thinking how their relationship would be accepted by others. “Right, that’s very much true. Although I wouldn’t say he doesn’t like you, but… he prefers others? My dad loves Sean. He adores him, but he also adores me and if I adore you, he’ll adore you too? Eventually? Maybe?” They were so screwed, but did it really matter right now?

She interrupted him. “No, no, not that. I just want you to tell me you’ll be there. I mean, you need to know, even if you won’t be, I’ll still end things with Sean, but I want for us to be with each other.” She was falling for him even more, just thinking about the reality of them being together was making her fall for him all over again. “I know you’re careful and I wouldn’t want it any other way, but I don’t want to time to pass because we were afraid of people around us. I don’t want to brag about our relationship, throw it in front of Sean immediately, but I don’t want to waste time. Couldn’t we be together in secret? No one would have to know. I’ll do my thing, you’ll do your thing, we’ll pretend we aren’t together, but we actually are? At least for some time until things calm down we could do that because I don’t know if I can be without you.” Staring at the Empire State Building in the distance, Emily bit her lip. “It’s not if you don’t want it to be.”

[genovese-jackson]

“We hung out once. I don’t think that classifies us as friends but she is nice and while I think that is weird and borderline ghastly. I don’t know she seems cool too?” Cara was an enigma and something told him there was more there but he chalked it up to it being Seth. “She hangs out with Seth because he makes her laugh, that makes no sense, right?” It was starting to get under his skin, how that made no sense. “Oh my god what if she is an angel.” Sounding like he had an epiphany. “If that’s the case I gotta get my life together. She’s here for a reason.” He laughed, only he would know how he was being a little bit serious. Those kinds of things always intrigued him, it was Jamie’s fault for putting those ideas in his head as children. -- “My mother doesn’t have the capability to hate someone.” Although now he wasn’t so sure about that, but he was saying what was necessary to make Emily feel better. “So--this is your way of making me feel better about your father not like me....You say he prefers others. I hear he does not like me. Nice try. Emily, you’re an amazing genius but the one thing you are terrible at is distracting me from the truth.”

Once Christian left him alone, it became more real in a few hours he would be on a plan out of New York. For how long he didn’t know but he still felt it was the right choice. His family would be fine, it was in the best hands. “I know you’re doing what you think is right and I agree with you, a hundred percent.” But did he think he could be there, he wasn’t a coward but didn’t this just strengthen his argument in his head that they did need some times for themselves. Jackson knew his feelings for Emily would never change and he couldn’t wait for them to be together. “If I can be honest when we are together I won’t care who knows it.” They had been through too much to care about another’s opinion, far too much. “--but then again for us to have something only the two of us know. Sounds familiar.” -- “We need time. We know we want to be together and we will. You know our goodbyes are never final.” One of their many flaws, he noted. 

[thequeengenovese]

While her brother was finishing with the bartender, Jennifer could honestly say she was enjoying watching the woman getting smaller and smaller with every word that came out from Jackson’s lips. Perhaps it was childish and mean, but sometimes people needed to be put into their rightful place. “See, I knew I should have added somewhere in there my best friend as well,” returning the smile, she started observing her brother - he seemed tired. “Was your first stop in New York the bar? You need sleep, Jack, not alcohol, but I’m glad to see you.. even though you could have called instead of accidentally running into me,” teasingly, she nudged him in his shoulder.

[genovese-jackson]

“Well, now you know to be specific the next time.” Jackson finished, hoping his sister would drop it. He had just got back to the city and the last couple of days had been crazy. When he felt himself yawn, he gave up on trying to hide it “Yes I did. But don’t you worry mom, I’m resting when this next shoot is done,” He looked down at the almost dead phone in his hand. “That I’m already late for--” He made no moves to leave his seat at the bar just the opposite to lay his head down on the counter. “I’m glad to see you too, I would have called but this was last minute --me coming back here that is. I was suppose to go to Melbourne. You seem?” He stopped to find the accurate word. “You seem happy? Start from the beginning, what the hell is going on?”

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

Emily nodded at the phone forgetting he couldn’t see her, but she continued to think about the hours just before their phone call. It was bound for them to keep crashing into each other. It was like the universe itself wanted for them to be together. “She’s such a good girl. so different than the rest of us. Maybe we all need more of someone like her in our lives.” Emily could never consider herself as a good person, but she had her moments. She wasn’t bad, but she wasn’t good either; maybe she was stuck somewhere in the middle and that was for the best. “What would your father say? About us? Your mom?” It was one thing to be the best friend of their one child, but to date their only son, she wasn’t so sure about how would they accept it. Emily had it all, everything that was important to parents, but she also had a very colorful past. And she could say she had a better relationship with Juliana than with her own mother, but no one could say if that was enough. “Right. That’s all you have to say?” Pouring her heart to him was not such a good idea in the end. All she got in return from him were one word sentences. Maybe she’s just wasting her time again. “If that’s all you have to say, right and that you’d love that, okay. That’s what you have to say and maybe the thrill is already leaving you, but it’s not leaving me. Not even one feeling I have for you. I just thought we were on the same page or that we could finally be. I guess I’m wrong.” They had to complicate everything even more than before and in that moment, it seemed like they would never ever find the same language and share the same view. “So that’s a goodbye?” 

[genovese-jackson]

“Yeah different is accurate, but do you really think she could hang with us?” Perhaps Jackson should have said what he was really thinking, would Cara survive. His life had taken some deadly turns as of recent he could only imagine what was next for him. But really what were they even considering, if anything Cara was yet another person that needed to be kept from them. “You’re concerned about my father? He likes you, in his own way. And--and he finds you funny, although he may not laugh--my grandfather was the same way.” Jackson laughed, but it was true. “And what can he say, trust me when I say I can still be called a saint compared to him.” But Jackson thought of his mother and although she was a very sweet woman, she was also very very Italian. “But my mother, we may have a problem. She adores you, but I can’t tell you how many times she’s tried to get me to date Cavalcante’s daughter. They joke all the time about me settling down and having the perfect Italian babies, but I know she’s not joking.” He sighed and stopped himself from rambling on, there were some parts of his wonderful Italian family he wished he did not have to deal with. “But we also both know I’m not your father’s favorite person, not even a little.”

Jackson was usually good with words, the art of word manipulation was something he invented or it was just in his blood. However, when needing to put his feelings into words, there would always be a problem and he would always say the wrong thing. “What do you want me to say Emily. Right, I absolutely agree break Sean’s heart. The guy absolutely deserves it?” When they both knew he was the last person to ever deserve such a thing. “You have to do what you have to do, I understand that and no the thrill is not leaving me, but I am being careful because even though we are not together I don’t want screw this up.” In his mind they were already acting as the couple, which made him smile. That smile which quickly dropped once he heard her finale question. “I guess--it is a goodbye?” For now, the words crossed his mind.

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

They would always end up saying wrong things and as a result they would mess things up. Maybe that was the reason why they were in a way so afraid of getting together in the past. Because saying wrong things always meant hurting each other. “I didn’t say that, Jackson. And I didn’t mean to hurt you but I just know what you’re capable of. I don’t want to see you deteriorating. I should just stop talking.” It would be for the best, to let go off that subject and just let him do whatever he wants even though she hated it. “Fine. Do what you want.”

Emily chuckled before she started laughing into the phone. “I think I was really horrible to her tonight and all because of you. And she’s the last person who deserved that, you know. I knew I was acting unreasonable, but I couldn’t control myself. I feel so silly now.” Emily continued to laugh while shaking her head at herself and her silliness. Basically, she was the girl who had everything she wanted, from looks and intelligence all the way to money and social status, but her jealousy sometimes was more than unreasonable. - “Right, that’s a smart saying.” She agreed with him while thinking more about his words or his father’s actually. It wasn’t like that, it wasn’t so black and white. Actually, Emily had already made her decision, the one she was supposed to make a long time ago. “No one can promise anyone eternal happiness, not even Sean, but yeah, he was pretty close to it. But that’s beside the point.” Emily walked over to her window and stared into the night. She had to stop thinking. “Look, people can be together. They can try to be together and maybe everything will work out and maybe it won’t. You can never know with these things because life always happens and maybe they will know how to deal with it and maybe they won’t. And same goes with hurting each other. People can promise to each other to try not to hurt each other and they can do everything to try to keep that promise, but you just never know what could happen. But that, that’s not the reason to not try to be together because you can get so much from being together, Jackson, and that’s what I want. That’s what I want with you.” Nodding to herself, she continued more confidently. “You’re my 2nd person, from that saying, you’re that. Because I never thought it was possible for us to be together and that’s why I was never thinking about it and I was basically ignoring my feelings, never admitting them. But you’re my 2nd person. I want to be with you. And I know that saying all of that to you while I’m still with Sean is horrible, but we both know we can’t be together anymore, not like this. It’s not right. And even though I don’t want to hurt him, I have to. I realized tonight that hurting him is the only right thing to do.” She was hoping Sean would realize that she never wanted to hurt him, but heart can only take so much and her own was hurting so bad. Sean couldn’t fix that, no matter how much they both wanted it. “So when I said I want to talk to you forever, I meant it that I want to be with you. I want to give us a chance to try to be together. We owe that to each other, Jack. If we end up hurting each other, fine, but at least we tried and we gave this love, well our love, a chance.”

[genovese-jackson]

“I won’t deteriorate. I am a Genovese. It is impossible.” And he believed every word of that. Sure he was the exception being the one to make a tone of mistakes, but he made up for that didn’t he? But no matter what anyone would say to him, his mind was made up and he would spend this time away from home finding himself.

Jackson smiled, “I’m mad I missed this.” Thankful their conversation was light again. “Something tells me Cara is a big girl, she can handle herself.” And oddly he believed his words to be true. It was even stranger that since he spent the entire evening with Cara, he still was clueless about who the girl was. Who she really was. Sure he believed she was genuinely nice, but that couldn’t be all there was to her. Sadly, with him leaving New York for a while he wouldn’t be finding that out. Oh well, he quickly thought. “It’s not every day I listen to my father.” He let that declaration sink in because it was rare for Jackson to listen to anyone that wasn’t himself. But even with the good advice he did get from Joseph, there Jackson was feeling conflicted again. On one hand, he was most happy to hear those words from Emily - that feeling to finally have everything he wanted so close in reach. Jackson believed they could have something wonderful, but that would come in time? Would it really be smart of them to try to be together after everything had just happened? When all of the hurt and pain was still fresh and could be felt? To him it would not be smart of them no matter how much love they had, getting together too soon could be a disaster. “Right.” When she mentioned Sean again, all he could do was agree, if anything Jackson wanted for Sean to get as far away from both of them for his own good. Jackson didn’t even want to think of how different their friendship would be after this. “I would love that--” His words seemed rushed. There was some movement on his end, in the background and all Jackson could be heard saying was thanks to someone else as they closed the door to his room. He got quiet again, but he didn’t take too long. “Yeah-- my um plane leaves tomorrow afternoon.” He forgot he told Christian the sooner the better. 

[thequeengenovese]

That girl behind the bar was grinning as if she had just won a billion dollar lottery, but really, who could blame her? Jackson was incredibly handsome, charming and confident, had a lot more money than the girl could ever imagine and he was famous - he was perfect. The question was, would Jennifer let the girl have her happiness or would she destroy it? “Oh, wipe off that grin and stop drooling - he won’t call you,” Jennifer said to the bartender who, surprisingly, started making all of the drinks just in front of Genovese siblings - it was more than pathetic. Moving her eyes onto her brother, she spoke up in a politer tone - or whatever you could call that. “Besides, isn’t your type a very rich heiress that is also an incredibly funny genius who has the perfect face and body of a model?” Innocently, she drank up her martini deciding to ignore his question.

[genovese-jackson]

“Dammit Jennifer.” Glaring at his little sister. However, he couldn’t hold that face for long. Jackson shrugged, “Yeah she has a point though, I mean nice legs but it’s been 10 minutes and I’m already bored with this.” Gesturing between him and the bartender, he then waved bye to the woman so she could get the hint and disappear. Jackson took one sip of his drink and frowned. “And she cannot make a good Manhattan, didn’t think I could be further disappointed.” He sat the glass down and tried with everything in him to not show how quickly Jennifer got under his skin. Jackson had only been back in New York City for a few measly hours. “Amanda Hearst is single? I might call her this time, sure she’s a bit older--” Pulling his best insincere smile, he winked at Jennifer.

[gihadidstyle-deactivated2016111]

Gigi Hadid & Francisco Lachowski for Tommy Hilfiger A/W 2016

[thequeengenovese]

              It was one thing to come first into a bar, it was a whole other thing to keep on waiting someone but, then again, it was entirely something else to be Jennifer Genovese and to have to wait. It wasn’t she who was waiting - it was the others who were always waiting for her. Furious, she sat at the bar of King Cole’s, drinking martini as her phone was laying in front of her. One could still read Adrianne’s message that she’d be late because of the car crash in Queens. Horrible - what was she even doing there? “No, you can’t sit here -,” Jennifer said in half annoying, half angry voice before she turned her head towards the unwanted person. “Oh, it’s you.”

[genovese-jackson]

He brushed his sister off taking the seat and gesturing to the very new bartender with gorgeous legs and dark hair. “Two manhattans put that on the Genovese tab.” All he had to do was look over the bartender once and knowing she would be his for an hour or two. “Yes, it is me your undeniable handsome brother--” Still making eyes at the bartender, he finally after some time and the bartender’s number turned to his sister. “Do I have to make a scene like the last time, why is there no welcome back party for me happening?” Jackson had only just returned to New York.

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

Emily tried to listen to him but honestly, whenever he was talking about Kristen or actually defending her, she’d be dying out of boredom. It was the same old story really. “One. How much do you really worship Saint Kristen?” If she could, she would have vomited at the thought. “Two. You’re the friendly one yet all your so called friends are girls. If you don’t count Tristan or family.” As much as she liked that friendly virtue of his, she was also hating it, especially when it was directed towards certain people. “No. I think your modeling career was something new and great when you were younger and you’d have been an idiot to not try it but now, yeah, now I see it like a waste of your potential.” Emily jumped down from her bed. “What? Beneath me? You know what, maybe you are. Any man who’s smart like you are and can be whatever he wants and in the end chooses modeling because it is easy and safe, is beneath me so maybe you’re right.” The last thing she wanted was to fight with him. This call wasn’t supposed to be like that. It was supposed to be different. “The drama? So all we are, all I am to you is drama? Nice.” She scoffed into the phone suddenly regretting that stupid idea of calling him. 

Her heart jumped when he said those three words and somehow she smiled into the phone repeating his words. That was him saying them the 2nd time tonight and it was still somehow surreal. “I know.” Emily replied because she knew with all her being that he was saying the truth, that he really loved her and wanted her. “I know you love me and now you know I love you too, and now everything is even messier than before. I just don’t know what to do, Jack. I mean I do, but it will be hard. How did we get here? How did I fall in love with both of you?” She knew it would be hard for him to listen to her, but she needed to say to him everything that was on her chest. “I love him too, you know. I love Sean, but I don’t know if that’s enough. I don’t know if it’s fair to love him when I love you too. Love you so much that I can’t even fight it. And avoiding you seems like the only right thing to do and that’s been working for a while, but now it’s kind of pointless. There were times when I was thinking about you all the time and then I stopped and now I’m thinking about you all the freaking time again. I mean, I almost lost it tonight when I saw you with Cara. The rational part of me knew it was insane, but I couldn’t help myself, Jackson. It’s crazy, everything I feel for you is crazy. And I think, no I know that Sean deserves someone better than me. Someone who will love him, only him and who will cherish him the way he deserves, you know.” Emily brushed off couple of tears from her cheek when suddenly his words dawned on her. “Never speak again? All I want to do is to talk to you forever.”

[genovese-jackson]

He couldn’t even begin to explain to Emily how wrong she was being. So he opted out at the last minute because really where would that get them, possibly into an argument. “Well I am glad you got that off your chest. Now we both know I was never good enough for you, bravo Emily. I mean is that what you called me for, to kick me while I’m down and belittle my choices to get my mediocre life back on track. This was a great talk. Now I’m really optimistic about my future now.” Sarcastically speaking, he wasn’t even mad anymore, just annoyed. “You’re doing exactly what everyone else has been doing for years now Emily, telling me what to do. That I can do better, that I can do this or that. Let me figure it out.” Rolling his eyes once he heard her scoff, “That is not what I meant, you’re not drama.”

“You were jealous of me and Cara? Mission accomplished.” His smile was big. Yet, he was joking, he didn’t take Cara to make Emily jealous and that wasn’t even the part of her confession that made him smile. Hearing that she believed him did that. To feel like he wasn’t alone in something this serious, it was just too bad that it was complicated to enjoy it. Hearing how much she loved Sean just put everything into perspective, they were both foolish. “If you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second.” His voice was nothing but the real sadness again. It made him incredibly happy to hear that Emily was in love with him, but what he also heard was how hard he made it for her because she did fall in love with Sean. It was him that still made the problems in that equation, and he couldn’t be happy about that. “Wise words from Joseph--never thought I’d repeat something my father said.” He shook his head, looking at nothing in particular in his lap. “Maybe you fell in love with Sean because you saw something you could actually have. Happiness. The one thing I can’t promise you will always be there for us. If there would ever be an us? I don’t know a lot about relationships, and you know my past with them. But I think there has to be happiness and trust. Trust in each other, and I trust you, but I-I don’t myself and that I won’t screw it up. What if I would hurt you?” -- He let out an uneasy laugh, “Well, my battery is at eight-one percent so that’s another couple of hours, I think? You can’t keep me here forever but I’m yours right now.....” Jackson shrugged. 

[oconnell-blood]

Genovias Ball || Jackson & Cara

[oconnell-blood]

It took some time for her to notice, but Jackson was definitely learning her ways. She’d been told by others a few times before that it was hard to tell when she was being serious. Years ago she wouldn’t have taken pride in such a thing, but now that meant she was a good liar, and it seemed she needed a lot of that. Sure sometimes she got caught up in her words or thoughts and couldn’t articulate everything she was saying correctly, but more often than not she was fine. She laughed at his response. It was a good thing she didn’t explain what she meant, because he caught on quickly after he asked. “But what if I did feed into that kind of thing?” She asked purely out of curiosity. Cara couldn’t imagine herself caring about labels so much. Her life would be drastically different if she had grown to accommodate such traits.

“I didn’t mean it as an insult.” She raised her hands up in defense. But she also didn’t think he took it that way, seeing as he wasn’t offended in the way he spoke. “I figured.” To say the least, is what she thought. She always felt that she could expand on her explanations, but never chose to. Carrying out that action would earn her the title of a rambler, which isn’t something she necessarily wanted to be known by. This coming from the woman who did not care about labels and appearances. Fun. When he mentioned the word she scrunched her nose while he was looking in another direction. Something tipped her off that his version of fun would not do well to please Cara. More than something, just about everything tipped her off. From the ones he called his friends and family, to where he hung out, or the way he acted. “Maybe I will.” She probably wouldn’t remind him, though. She felt content on where she was now. “Actually,” She began her speech. “I can.” Raising an eyebrow as she continued. “Have you ever heard of the phrase opposites attract? And not in that way.” She pointed a finger at him. Even if she had felt a sliver of affection for Seth, she didn’t want their conversation going down that road. “He’s good company. He makes me laugh.” A shrug followed her words. She never wanted to dig too far deep into her and Seth’s relationship with anyone. Some days they were friends speaking happily about random subjects, and others they were staring daggers at each other. Though it was hard for her to hold a grudge, so she always spoke to him sooner or later. Her slow pace of walking was stopped as Jackson stopped in front of her. “And I’m sure you have a plethora of them.” She laughed again. It was funny to her how easily his mood could change. One mention of alcohol and his energy went through the roof. An example of that followed quickly as he dashed off without her, which only caused her to laugh once more. “Getting ahead of yourself, I see.”

[genovese-jackson]

Cara’s question was easy to answer, “Then you would have fooled me--.” Something hard to do, Jackson tilted his head whilst looking at her. A little smile appear as he looked to be studying her. “--And I’m usually right about everyone one I meet.” He winked. 

He gave a little shrug, to mean none taken. He knew what she meant but still listened intently. “Maybe?” Why Jackson had never heard such a word, he said it to himself as if it were foreign to him. That girl was bizarre to him, no one said maybe to him, if anything he were expecting dates to be thrown and planning to commence. It made him laugh though, as what she was presently saying about Seth Morgan. Luke’s errand boy from Queens or was it Brooklyn? Jackson forgot or didn’t care to remember that fact. The only thing that struck him in that conversation was Cara saying he was good company, and Jackson never in his twenty something years could remember a person that hung so closely to Luke be described as that. “Seth, great sense of humor. Perfect.” Simply said, it was made clear that he wouldn’t get anything else about Cara’s and Seth odd friendship. --”Oh you have no idea.” This was nothing. Sometimes Jackson could get ahead of himself. Jumping from one thought to the next and the next that wasn’t even a thought yet. He admitted he had that problem, many times -- it got him into trouble. But he stopped himself, remembering Cara, before the rest of his thoughts were would found at the bottom of a bottle of bourbon. Instead, he would show her the rest of the beautiful property. Pass the gardens, the famous maze and finally to his favorite place in the whole mansion. It was just like he remembered, four glorious walls decorated with every alcohol known to man. There was another couple just leaving, so Jackson took it upon himself to fix himself what he came there for. A quite generous drink he fixed, “What are you drinking? but keep in mind I’m not a mixologist --although I’ve had just about everything I probably could?”

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

Even though he couldn’t see her, Emily rolled her eyes. “Yeah, you’re calling your friend anyone these days.” What bothered her was that he would spend time with Kristen, a lot of time. Emily couldn’t stand the girl because of the obvious reasons but to now know Jackson would again be with her, it was driving her crazy. She hated it. “Take serious modeling career? Oh come on, you’re so much smarter than that. You’ll be just wasting both your time and intelligence on that. Leave that to the brainless ones like… I don’t know, Kristen.” Emily viciously added not even caring anymore because why would she? Jackson knew her and knew how she could be. There was no need to act differently. “Why does it have to be Hollywood? Why not start small? With indie movies, maybe theaters? You need to live your life for yourself. As much as I understand your obligation and need to protect your family, you need to do what you want. Otherwise, you’ll be a very miserable man, Jackson. I… I don’t want to see you turning into that.” Emily said really softly into the phone. “Disappointed?” She stopped to think about it. “Yeah, maybe I am because you’re wasting your potential and energy on irrelevant things. You could do so much more and better and yet you’re throwing it all away because it’s easier and it is good for everyone else around you except of you. Is it so wrong of me to actually believe in you? Want more for you? Because,” Emily stopped. She wasn’t thinking that telling him that again would be a good idea, but she needed to. It was selfish and horrible on so many levels, but she needed to. “Because everything I said earlier tonight, Jackson, is true. I… I love you… and I want you to have everything you dream of and want. Is that so wrong?”

[genovese-jackson]

All Jackson could do was to laugh, he did not even attempt to hide it anymore. He truly believed all of the women in his life were insane or simply on the brink of it. But really, he calmed himself so he could speak. “One. She’s been a friend of mine for quite some time.” Perhaps longer than he was with Emily, maybe even Rothschild, but honestly it did not matter to him. There were reasons he was good friends with them all, each being very different. “And two. We all know I am the friendly one in this family --” Sighing loudly as if it was a hard job to bare, however it was true when comparing him to the others in his family. Well no one could take the place of his mother, who was in his eyes the real saint. His father could be quite charming, but there was always the ulterior motive with him. “But wait? Is that what you think my modeling career was? --A waste of my time and intelligence?” He tried not to be offended; but if she were touching upon that model stereotype then how could he not. “I’m sorry we can not all be like you Emily Childs? Us brainless ones are so pathetic. Beneath you really?” Now he felt annoyed for taking it to heart the way he did. But he kept telling himself she said those things because she cared although she really shouldn’t after everything they had said to one another and been through. “Yeah, and for how long have I been screwing up? Making things worse for everyone? I will not be miserable, if anything I will be happier. Finally free of the drama.” Perhaps the last part was pushing it, but he held hope. And he hoped Emily would believe him because truth be told he didn’t want to argue anymore. “Well, will you let me worry about my irrelevant things, I have to figure this out, just me.”

He tensed up at her words, dropping the phone from his ear he looked at the ceiling. He even prayed the words would come to him, what he was suppose to say back to her, but after a minute or five passed, nothing had come. “Emily, you can’t say--” But he stopped himself. If this was to be their last conversation, at least for some time. The separation would be good for them. And although he did not know what would become of Emily and Sean all he could be sure of were his own feelings. “Everything I said is the truth. I love you.... too.” He tried to laugh. The three words he waited ages to hear from her came at such a bittersweet time. “I know you don’t believe me when I say it, but that was me being the most honest I’ve ever been with someone. It’ll never be Kristen or Cara. So if we never speak again, I need you to know that.”

[ashleeanyag52]

Francisco Lachowski ❤️❤️❤️ 😘

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

Hearing him say he was leaving was one thing, but to hear him say with whom and where he was leaving was something entirely different. To say she wasn’t jealous would be a lie because Emily and jealousy went hand in hand. And with Jackson, Emily’s jealousy would always reach new heights. She couldn’t help herself; either she’d attack the girl or would lash out on him in some way and when she’d think about it more, it was probably the real reason why she was so mean towards some women or all of them. “Kristen?” She asked trying to stay cool like it was not bothering her. “You’re going with Kristen? Seriously? With her? I mean, really, that’s low.” And there it was, the mean mockery lacing her voice. In that very moment she knew how horrible that must have sounded, horrible and pathetic, but she couldn’t control herself. “London? Italy? And now you want to restart your modeling career because of her? Fuck, Jackson, you had so big dreams. What happened to that? What happened to movies? To you directing them? Now you want to be a model again.” But why was she even bothering, anything she’d say would be in vain. Let’s be real, she had never had any power over him, she was not the one who was able to influence his thoughts and who could bring out the best in him. And now she remembered, all of a sudden she remembered that day in her room when she asked him what was the difference between Kristen and her? It dawned on her, there was no difference because he wasn’t comparing them. Kristen was the one who he could talk to, listen to, the one who could inspire him and she, well she was Emily, just that. 

[genovese-jackson]

“What does that even mean?” He laughed. “--She’s my friend, something you and my sister love to forget for whatever reason?” Clearly he was dumbfounded by the disdain they held for that girl, but he found it funny most days. Jackson knew he probably should have been bothered at the fact that she felt so strongly about his own choices like they would affect her in some way, it honestly brought a smile to his face because he knew what this was. “That’s what you heard? That I want to start back my career because of Kristen. No -I’m doing this because I want it. I’m going to take it serious this time.” His dreams of being in the big movies were real, but maybe, he started to think they wouldn’t be a good idea. His family was already in the spotlight and not for the best of things either. “I think I may have been getting ahead of myself with the movie ideas --hollywood, doesn’t sound like a great idea anymore. It never was Emily. There will be even more eyes on my family and you know with what’s going on right now, it won’t be good.” He was trying to be practical with his goals for himself and he was also trying his best to not cause anymore trouble. “So what now? Are you even more disappointed in me? --You know I will miss these talks of ours.” Sadly he’d be always missing these moments. Those crazy moments when she’d be telling him off, and for the life of him he could not be serious or those times when he was just listening to her ramble on about something. It would be hard, not to talk to her everyday, hear her voice.

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

Emily frowned. “Come on, Jack, what sunset? Sean… he’s angry and I’ve never seen him so angry like tonight. We had fights, sure, but this one… he’s really angry.” She finished with the obvious sadness in her voice. The last thing she had ever wanted was to hurt someone. Maybe in a way all three of them got hurt. “And I kissed you back!” It was almost a shout. “You said I was pushing you away, but that’s not the truth. We both know it. I think even Sean knows it.” Kissing back Jackson, admitting she was in love with him too; mistakes, awful mistakes. But it was bound to happen. Whenever they were together, something like that would happen. That was one of the reasons she was trying to avoid Jackson as much as possible. “Where would you even go?” He couldn’t. He couldn’t go.

[genovese-jackson]

“I know that! I was there, Emily--” Jackson spoke up perhaps too harshly. Holding the phone to himself he grew quiet again. He should have never picked up the phone, regretting it more than ever. Jackson had no idea what to say to her. Or how he was to go about this. Was he suppose to encourage her to go after Sean, but how was he suppose to do that, genuinely meaning everything he would say, when having those feelings of his? He knew nothing would come of them especially now after everything had happened tonight. Jackson could not even mention that kiss, although it replayed on his mind a million times. He decided to ignore everything about it, even though it did happen and there was a little confession with it that she loved him, still -- but it wasn’t something that would get his hopes up because she chose Sean from the start and Jackson felt it would probably always be that way. Perhaps they both knew better, Jackson could only hurt her no matter how much love was there. “Uhh, um, Kristen extended an invite to go with her to Greece, maybe Amsterdam too.” He relaxed a bit. “We were talking about starting again my modeling career--I agreed.” Perhaps he did wonder what Emily’s reaction would be, but he also knew his mind was made up on everything. “I mi-might even look at places in London, or if my mother wants to move back to Italy since clearly ---I’d move back with her.”

[oconnell-blood]

Genovias Ball || Jackson & Cara

[oconnell-blood]

She decided to leave the subject of his mother behind after hearing his almost uninterested words. Cara didn’t particularly enjoy speaking about her parents, as she didn’t know too much about them. That topic almost always ended up leading to her grandparents, whom she considered her closest family. When she was younger, she always thought that if she ever met Liam and her father it would have been much different. If Cara could have gone back in time and warned her younger self of what she might have been getting into, maybe she wouldn’t be standing where she was at that moment. She simply nodded her head and gave a sweet smile as an answer to his statement. It almost seemed like Jackson forgot who he was talking to at certain points in their conversation. The change of tone in his voice often became softer and less opposing, probably because he thought Cara was innocent in all of it.

For a moment she wondered if giving Jackson free rein was a bad thing, seeing as he was firing questions left and right at her. She raised her eyebrows as he asked away, again, and again. Cara remained standing as he sat by the fountains. “I-” She cut herself off by letting out a small laugh before continuing. “I don’t know, that’s a hard one.” She laughed again. “I guess I was surprised. After all it was Jackson Genovese asking me to a ball.” She brought a hand up to her mouth and let out a gasp, joking of course. “I said yes because, frankly, I thought it might be fun. And you aren’t the worst company in the world.” She showed a genuine smile and thought over his next few questions, yet again the topic of Seth was brought up. “To most I am, or at least I try to be. And by another Cara you mean?” She cocked her head to the side in question. “As I said, I act this way around most people, so yes he has.” Cara nodded her head with her words. She let another smile slip onto her face when he defended himself from her statement about the gardens. “I see. I do drink, yes.”

[genovese-jackson]

For the first time in an awful long time Jackson was enjoying in hearing about someone else. It was a nice change in which he was use to carrying on conversations that were mostly about him and what he would be doing, thinking and feeling at the moment. It was a nice change even if he wondered if Cara was even real at this point. He stopped momentarily in walking so he wouldn’t lose her and secondly, so he could listen as she answered each one of his questions. He was rather curious, he wouldn’t lie. “I didn’t think you fed into that kind of thing?” His voice trailed off but he was speaking of how she said his name, like he was person from a different world. Which was rather true but he didn’t think Cara cared about those things, or was he wrong? And then he stopped once again when realizing she was joking with him. 

“Oh I can be fun, but not at these kind of events. I am afraid it will be all about appearances and boring business talk. I have to apologize.” Sounding again uninterested, it was not in her but their current surroundings was what bored him. If she were though, she’s witness a murder, but Jackson didn’t want to traumatize the poor woman. “Remind me to show you some real fun when we get out of here. Then you can decide if I’m fun or not.” Jackson smiled. “By another Cara?” What did he even mean, Jackson was just being nosy and wanting to understand better the relationship between Seth and her. Seth didn’t seem to be the couple type and that was probably the only thing they could have in common, but it still raised so many question as to why Seth and Cara were friends. “Of course you do, forgive me for being so nosy, but you can’t blame me, can you? I mean Seth is pretty wild and well you’re?” His brows raised, he offered her a sincere grin but still he searched for words that wouldn’t be seen offensive to her. Finally, he released a breath that sounded as if he held it for quite some time. It caused him to spin on his heels to face her. With that charming and delighted smile of his. “See I knew we would get along just fine. One can never have too many drinking buddies,” An excited and eager Jackson couldn’t help but to rush off in that direction, the bottle practically had his name on it. Partially out of the gardens already, he stopped himself again once realizing what he did. “Right--I forgot.” Quickly walking back for Cara, he offered her his arm. 

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

Emily heavily rolled her eyes when he mentioned Sean. If she wanted to talk with Sean, she’d have called him. But there was a harsh truth to it, he wouldn’t have picked up. Maybe she was supposed to call him though. “No, I didn’t.” Sean was mad and although they had their share of fights, this one was very different from the rest. It was the most serious one ever. “One of the reasons I called you was to thank you for taking on all the blame on yourself.” She paused for a moment.“ You really didn’t have to do that, Jack.” Emily said softly into the phone while she made herself more comfortable on her bed.

She jumped up. “What? What do you mean you’re leaving? Why?” He was joking, wasn’t he? He had to be joking. He couldn’t go anywhere, not now. Why would he leave? Not because of her, right? But deep in her thoughts, trying to understand his reasons, Emily only let out a small chuckle when he thanked her for still caring.

[genovese-jackson]

Of course it crossed his mind that he shouldn’t be concerned about her relationship problems, although he was greatly tied to the reasons. He still felt a tinge of worry for them both, because why wasn’t she with Sean, moreover why was she calling him? 

Removing the phone again from his ear, to look at it like with a frown or two on his face, he shook his head. “Yes, I did. -- Now you two get to ride off into the sunset.” He took the bitterness from his voice once realizing it was there. “I took the blame because it was my indeed my fault, I kissed you.” Thinking to himself, it was not her concern and that he shouldnt tell her anything, and yet. “I think --- It’s nothing, maybe a year or I don’t know? New York won’t miss me -- but who am I kidding right,” He tried to laugh, trying to be that cocky guy he was known to be. 

[jaz-kat-deactivated20200811]

Jessie Ware- Say You Love Me

[childs-emily]

Jackson & Emily: Almost 4am

[childs-emily]

There were only two possible options; either Jackson was already asleep or he was ignoring her call. She wouldn’t be surprised if the latter was the correct assumption, but she couldn’t also understand why would he refuse to answer after everything that was said earlier tonight? Emily would be never able to fully understand Jackson, no matter how much she was maybe hoping for.

She stopped counting the rings after 6th or 7th one and it seemed to her like the time was passing and she was stuck in the middle of it. She should have just quit after the 3rd ring. Why even bother? Like she knew at all what would she say to him. A lot of things came to her mind, a lot of stupid things and crazy things and things that didn’t matter, but she wanted to tell him and… and then he picked up.

Silence. Not even a hello or hi or what do you want. He greeted her with silence. Swallowing hard, Emily tried to compose herself before she would say something. At least she heard him breathing on the other side and in the same time it was such a scary and comforting thought. “I just… I just called to… Um…” And she had no idea what to say. Her mind was all of a sudden empty and she chuckled at herself. “I don’t know. I just… I just wanted to hear you. And…” She let her back fall on the bed. “And… I don’t know.”

[genovese-jackson]

He scoffed, taking the phone from his ear to ask himself what was he even doing right now. Jack had no clue why he answered the call from her. But it would be a lie and he couldn’t do that to himself anymore - to lie. He wanted to hear her voice too. However, Jack had to come to his senses.

“Did you mistake my number for, oh -- I don’t know Sean’s, maybe?” There was only curiosity in his tone.

He got up and started searching for anything to wear besides this suit. Perhaps a trip into his father’s closet would be necessary since so little of Jack’s belongings remained here. He could have sent someone to get him something from his place but it was four in the morning. “Or did you call me because you heard that I was leaving and you wanted to get your goodbye in first?” He pulled a white shirt from his father’s closet to wear with the pants found in his own. Probably the only one still up in this house, he sauntered back into his room. “So very flattered, you still care Miss Childs.”