[ghost-dadd]

would you rather

be made out of cheese

be made out of hornets

Voting ended onMay 31

[ghost-dadd]

i really appreciate the cheese math @ifvwasix

[theonion]

As they shooed a herd of giraffes into a nearby bathroom, workers told reporters Friday that they were frantically scrambling to hide all of the San Diego Zoo’s animals ahead of a visit from the landlord. “He texted an hour ago saying he was dropping in to check the garbage disposal, so we’ve been running around cleaning up evidence of the 12,000 rare and endangered animals we’ve got living here,” senior zookeeper Allison Weepie said while lighting a scented candle to cover the stench of snakes, Gila monsters, and tortoises in the reptile exhibit.

Full Story

[sailatina3]

[coolcomicbookcovers]

[pandaphox]

Just saying

[my-dailydreams]

[mahvoloji-deactivated20200501]

[ruinedchildhood]

[porcelain-rob0t]

the european mind cannot comprehend the 48 oz dunkin bucket

[derryderrydown]

Excuse me while I look something up...

1.4 litres????

[politenotice]

[interestingmistakes]

[kalichnikov]

[clarificationsw]

literally my dad

[chaussurre]

[amygdalae]

mutuals if you were a video game character I would do every step of your questline and get your good ending

[reallycoolsoup]

What would you do with non mutuals? Cause speedrunners are always killing me for my crystal scythe before doing my quest

[amygdalae]

Well now that I know you have a crystal scythe I'm definitely killing you for your crystal scythe

[theperksofbeingahugefuckingcunt]

Apparently my stepdad and I are fucking psychically linked because ?? every single time he makes chili for dinner I get a migraine. Without fail. And it became like a ha ha running joke because it happened so many times but now I’m living 3 hours away from my parents and I just texted my mom and

WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME

[theperksofbeingahugefuckingcunt]

Happy disability pride month

[nose-bl]

via @ninjahijabimuse​

this is so much better i love it

[squeakitties]

[inquisitorgrand]

[loafpile]

seems like self-castration is the only solution these days..

[druidvibesonly]

[catkola]

Bitches wanna buy their boyfriends the latest consoles but when was the last time he CONSOLED you? ps 5 years ago

[innerchildabortionclinic]

[70sscifiart]

Me, logging on to work after the long weekend

[wincoshopper666]

I’m all in