What Should We Call Ghost Tours?

I'm a tour guide in the French Quarter. I'm cheerful because I get all my rage out in gif form.

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Pacing myself when Carnival season begins:

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When Mardi Gras Day finally arrives:

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What passes for Lent in New Orleans:

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Tour managers when I explain the entire history of yellow fever before I even get to the ghost

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When I take an emergency box office shift after not having done it in like three years

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Every time they finish renovating a block on Bourbon Street

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Late night drinking at Voodoo and the Tamale Guy walks in

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Realizing on Saturday night that I volunteered to cover someone’s Sunday cemetery shift

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The first time I ever saw a mule peeing

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When I get a private tour for only two people and I ask them if they have any special requests, feedback, literally anything since they spent so much money

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When guests try to engage me in a political debate

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Gotta love those Jazz Fest Crowds

Bless their hearts.

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“We picked y’all out of all the tours on Tripadvisor!”

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Midwestern mom got white girl wasted:

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My entire Saints and Sinners tour:

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“Please come in for Treme this morning, we have one guest, international cell phone”

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When they start walking away before I even get to my tip line: