life is war

i have been dreaming, dreaming a golden dream

[josephqunnies]

☀️ s m i l e ☀️

[gideonhillel]

STEPHEN!

          disheveled  tufts  of  brown  hair  are  swept  by  the  wind  every  so  often  as  stephen  sits  with  his  arms  resting  atop  his  knees.   heels  are  nestled  lazily  into  the  sand,  the  cool  breeze  casting  a  darker  essence  across  rough  waters  as  the  male  just  watches  for  a  moment.   there’s  a  distant  rumble  of  thunder,  but  it’s  not  close  enough  to  be  concerning.   that,  however,  doesn’t  stop  him  from  eyeing  the  person  approaching  the  water  &  it  certainly  doesn’t  stop  him  from  prying.     ❛   you  know  the  current’s  fucked,  right  ?   ❜   eyes  fall  from  the  other  to  the  water,  but  his  body  doesn’t  react.   in  fact,  stephen  remains  still   –––   calm,  cool,  collected.     ❛   you  go  in,  you’re  gettin’  torn  away  from  shore  &  i  don’t  really  wanna  be  responsible  for  that.   ❜     leave  it  to  him  to  have  some  heart,  right  ?

⋯     @kildarestarts​  !

***

He hadn’t even noticed him, his eyes so focused on the water. Even when he didn’t have to work, Gideon found himself drawn to the water. He missed fishing for fun. It had started as a hobby, but he was too good to not turn it into a job. Now it was more of a chore than an enjoyable past time. He turned to look at the other. There were days when he would stare at the horizon for hours as he imagined hopping on a boat and never looking back. “I did know, but thanks for the heads up. I wasn’t going to swim. I just wanted to look.” His words were punctuated with a shrug.

[loveallthegays]

Ronen Rubinstein by Ekaterina Belinskaya

[loveallthegays]

Ronen Rubinstein Instagram Story (June 26th, 2020)

[gideonhillel]

KYU!

kyu lets out a soft giggle as the other continues to talk about his own high school musical experience . “ oh , i absolutely loved it . my mom didn’t really want me watching it , but i did anyway when she went to bed . sharpay is a fuckin’ icon , truly . inspires my fashion every day . ” kyunhgo jokes around with the other , hoping to lighten the mood more so than it already was . “ i was just kind of . . wandering , you know ? sometimes it’s nice to explore the island a bit . ”

***

“Sounds like you were a rebel child,” he laughed. He always liked TV more for the background noise. He hadn’t watched many shows or movies, and half paid attention to whatever random channel he landed on. Gideon nodded his head. “It is nice. There are some really nice, hidden places if you know where to find them.” He had his spots staked out, where he could sit and be alone and watched the waves crash against the sand. 

[gideonhillel]

FINN!

for a moment, finn thought he was going to be shit out of luck standing in the middle of the parking lot. he really didn’t want to put down all the bags to unlock his jeep then pick them up again. his eyes glanced over when he saw the other male moving close, placing a smile on his face. “thanks.” he tightened his grip on the bags in his hands. “no, just trying to feed a bunch of twenty somethings. everything is empty at my house.” he sighed, glancing down at his pocket where the keys sat. “can you unlock the door for me?” 

***

“No problem.” It seemed like the right thing to do to try and help him. It wasn’t like it was hard or threw a wrench in Gideon’s plans. “Ah, that explains it. Basically the same thing.” He knew what it was like to buy groceries for the family. That’s exactly what he was doing now. It was a hassle trying to shop for many different people with many different opinions. “Yeah, sure thing, man.” He got his keys and unlocked the car. “Do you need any more help?” 

[gideonhillel]

BEAU!

“yeah, one day. i hope so.” his smile spread to a full out grin. not only was the other male still standing in front of him. there was now a promise for another hang out between the two of them. other than his best friend, he hadn’t felt this easy hanging out with someone in a long time. they were just having a conversation and beau wasn’t running for the hills or telling him to fuck off. he was genuinely interested in him. gideon seemed like someone that had it all figured out and beau was kind of envious. he had a plan for his future but it wasn’t his plan or the future he wanted. gideon had a job and was making his own money. it was admirable to say the least. “or you know, for anything else.” his eyes glanced down. he was feeling a bit shy in the moment. when he saw gideon’s smile, he knew the message was well received. 

it wasn’t that beau wanted to be a pogue. he wasn’t sure he would survive. he didn’t really have any life skills. he didn’t really know what to do with his life other than go to college to get a degree he didn’t want. he was envious of the freedom that the pogues had. the way they were able to live their lives and not have to live up to family expectations. act like a robbins. don’t embarrass me in front of my friends. those were words he heard often from his father. he did everything in his power to do the exact opposite and nothing changed. he was still a robbins. still a kook. a hand lifted to his face, touching the stubble on his face. “what’s what like? being a kook?” his eyes glanced up to connect with the other male’s. they were absolutely breath taking. he didn’t want to talk about his life, though. “so, you’re free, then.” a smile came to his face once more. “yes, if you walked away, i’d miss you but i was wondering if you wanted to grab something to eat.” he inhaled, waiting for the answer. 

***

A smile spread across Gideon’s face to match Beau’s. It was confirmation that he hadn’t imagined the other’s interest in him. Maybe there had been a part of him that was worried that he was imaging the interest. He constantly felt like he wasn’t enough, like there was more he could be doing. It manifested itself in all kinds of ways, one such being that Beau was only pretending to care about what Gideon had to say. But his smile suggested otherwise. Gideon didn’t want to get his hopes up, but he clung to Beau’s smile, wishing it meant something. He chuckled. “I’m sure it will be good to know for the future.” He had stopped planning for the future a long time ago, but it didn’t seem to be so bad.

He couldn’t imagine being rich. He had tried, but there was like a block in his mind when he did. It seemed so different from the life he had always live. He had been working so long, he wasn’t sure what he would do if he did have free time. He liked staying busy. He liked doing things to keep his mind occupied. That’s not to say he didn’t want money. Gideon wanted to live comfortably. “Yes,” he said with a shrug. He wanted to get to know Beau better. He was seeking some kind of confirmation that he wasn’t a typical rich kid, and he wasn’t wasting his time here. His eyes widen as Beau continued to speak. “I would love to.” He found that he actually meant the words. He didn’t want to leave him behind just yet. “Did you have anywhere particular in mind?” 

[gideonhillel]

SAWYER!

Sawyer was digging into her pocket, for her card to order her coffee, next.  She hadn’t even noticed that the guy in front of him as paid for her drink. The cashier told her as she finished her order.  She shoved her card back into her pocket, before stepping aside.  She had plans to head to the ferry today. She needed coffee first since she had left her house super early this morning.  It was usually how a day like this went. Stepping aside to him, offering him a smile as she did “Thanks for the coffee” meeting his gaze, as she stood there next to him. 

***

He stuffed his hands in pockets. He hated being on the receiving end of praises and thank yous. He always did what he thought other decent human beings should do, so he felt awkward getting special attention for it. “It’s no problem.” He waved off her gratitude. “What did you end up getting?” It would be good to have some forewarning before he looked in his bank account. 

[loveallthegays]

Ronen Rubinstein by Ekaterina Belinskaya

[jovannievlogs]

Ronen Rubinstein vía Instagram Story

[gideonhillel]

COLBY!

he had found his perch for the evening on the hood of an old clunker.  the beat up car had been sitting on this abandoned lot for as far back as colby could recall.  he remembered walking past it most days en route to school, and in the years since it had become a place for him to go when he didn’t want to hole up in his tiny crap apartment.  “you want one?”  he leaned back and fished a can of beer out from the passenger seat, offering it to his companion.  while colby didn’t have enough mechanical know-how to do anything about the car, he did keep it stocked enough for his own selfish purposes.  “i promise i just got these earlier.  they haven’t been sitting here as long as the car,”  he admitted with a quiet laugh.  //  @kildarestarts​

***

He liked being out at night. He liked being beneath the stars, feeling like the possibilities were endless and he had the whole world within his grasp. No matter what he did or what happened to him, a part of him would always be a dreamer, holding out for something better. He sighed as he leaned on the hood of the car, looking up at the sky, hardly paying attention to his present company. At the offering, he said, “no thanks.” One beer wouldn’t have been so bad, but it was habit to say no. “It means more for you.” 

[gideonhillel]

MAGGIE!

fingers  tapped  intensely  against  the  mouse  &  keyboard  in  front  of  her  as  bright  blue  hues  flickered  from  side  to  side  ,  analyzing  the  screens  intensely.  to  say  maggie  was  deep  in  a  flow  state  while  she  worked  almost  felt  like  an  understatement  with  the  way  she  so  easily  ignored  the  sound  of  her  hungry  stomach.  but  maggie  was  committed  to  her  work  &  only  the  sound  of  the  front  door  opening  pulled  her  eyes  away  ,  darting  to  the  door  instead.  she  did  about  ninety  percent  of  her  work  remotely  ,  &  most  of  her  clients  were  from  elsewhere  so  seeing  someone  walk  in  was  unexpected.  ❛  uh  ,  hi  ,  can  i  ,  uh  ,  can  i  help  you  ?  ❜  ╰  @kildarestarts​  ╮

***

His boss had called him up for restaurant rebranding efforts. It wasn’t in his job description, but he’d been working there a while, so he was a trusted employee. He’d done some research and found a there was a graphic designer in town, which he thought was lucky on his part. He looked down at the address he had written on a sticky note and looked back at the building. This was the place. He walked in and smiled at the blonde girl. “Hi, do you do logo designs?” 

[gideonhillel]

FINN!

to say that finn was exhausted after a long day working in the sun was an understatement. the only thing he wanted to do was go home to bury his head in his pillows but that wasn’t in the cards for him right. there wasn’t much food in the house and he needed a bit of sustenance before going to sleep. his arms were full as he moved out of the small grocery store between the cut and figure eight. he should have brought the cart outside with him but that thought was long gone. unfortunately for him, the keys to his jeep were in his pocket and he was struggling a bit. glancing around the parking lot, he whistled to get someone’s attention, hoping they would assist so he wouldn’t have to change the flow of his motions. “hey, do you mind? i could use a bit of help.” his feet remained planted in front of the trunk of his jeep as he pleaded with his eyes. 

***

His mom had sent him to the store to pick up a few things for his siblings. It irritated him because she was perfectly capable of doing it, but he wouldn’t refuse because he wanted to help them. He had just gotten out of his car when he heard someone whistle. He recognized Finn and walked towards him. “Not at all.” He took a few of the grocery bags from him. Gideon wasn’t in a rush. “You look like you’re stocking up for a hurricane.” 

[gideonhillel]

MADDIE!

“ so, did you enjoy the bonfire party this weekend? ” madeline asked, looking over at the person she was now sitting next to on the staircase outside. the weather was beautiful; the sky was light blue and you could barely see a cloud in sight, which was nice. “ did you end up getting into any trouble? ” madeline asked and chuckled softly, while rubbing her hands against her thighs as she continued to look at the person next to her. 

***

He shrugged in response. He never had a lot of fun at things like that. He wasn’t a huge fan of crowds or letting loose. He felt like he should like them, but parties were typically the last thing on his mind. He leaned backward on his hands, tilting his head towards the sun. “Of course not. Did you?” He turned his head towards her as he asked. 

[tuagifs]

So I’m starting over.

[gideonhillel]

KENNEDY!

Kennedy’s smile turned to a slow frown but she knew Gideon was responsible and she wouldn’t bust his ass for it. “Well when you have off next you have to treat yourself.” she smiled softly, “You deserve it Gid.” bringing the straw to her lips she titled her head, “You know I’d share my kidney with you right? What’s a slushy in the grand scheme of things?” she smirked. “So wanna make a bet on how many people nose dive into the surf tonight?” she laughed. 

***

“Yeah, maybe,” he said noncomittally. When he did have off, he liked to throw his feet up and relax. He didn’t like feeling like he had to do anything. Drinking wasn’t a chore, but he loved feeling in control. He shrugged off her comment. He didn’t always feel like he deserved anything. He couldn’t stop at this point; he had to keep working. “I think you deserve it a bit more,” he said deflecting. “If you keep up with this, I don’t know how much your kidney will be worth,” Gideon teased. “Five dollars says at least five of them.” 

[gideonhillel]

KYU!

kyunhgo laughs along with the other . “ it was disgusting . i mean , watching it , you know . even though sharpay seemed to be a raging bitch , i did feel bad that she got chili cheese all over her cute outfit . ” he finds himself to be rambling , and shuts up before he becomes annoying . “ so , where were you headed ? ”

***

“I don’t think I remember High School Musical as well as you.” He watched it because he felt like he had to. He didn’t remember hating it, but he didn’t remember loving it either. “I think the only characters I can name are Troy and Sharpay.” He readjusted his grip on the fishing pole, trying to make sure his fingers didn’t become too sore. “I was just going to return home. What about you?”