"I'm not like other fans. I actually engage with the text's themes instead of making memes or shipping characters. Only I truly understand the author's intent." girl you can do both
Prompt: It is the night before the finale and despite your shared grief, Gi-hun asks you a very important question. You offer all you can give, and share a passionate night of uncertainty whilst you still can.
Pairing: Seong Gi-hun X Female Reader
Word count: 3.8K
Tags: Graphic depictions of death, lots of angst
Spoilers: Episode 1-8
Note: Once again, I have not proofread what I wrote because I'm very tired right now. Go easy on me when you find spelling errors, I'll correct them later when I find the time to do so :)
MINORS DNI
There was a steady tapping of Sang-woo’s foot against the tiles that echoed through the room and caused annoyance to grow inside your chest. Slumped against her bed sat Sae-byeok, unwell, sweat beading on her forehead, her lips sickly pale and chapped.
You dabbed a wet piece of toilet paper against her face, the thin material falling apart under your touch, but it was all you could work with right now. All you could do was make her as comfortable as possible, the crimson stain that seeped into the mattress only growing larger.
Looking up, your gaze met Gi-hun’s, who looked at your mutual friend with concern, grief already tugging at your heart even though she was still here. He gave you a wry smile, tight-lipped, hair messily sticking in the air. It gave him a boyish look, and you smiled back, a shaky sigh leaving your lips.
“(Y/n),” Sae-byeok croaked, a weak hand wrapping around your wrist, her blood smearing all over it. You didn’t mind it, for you were soaked in it anyways, and leaned forward so that you could hear her properly. “(Y/n), don’t go.”
Tears blurred your vision and you shook your head, giving her a reassuring smile. “I am not going anywhere.”
She, however, was. You had seen people die before, especially in the past weeks, but those deaths had been sudden and with little time to see the process. Your friend was slipping away slowly, her life drained from her once lively eyes gradually, a painful wheeze in her lungs making for an unpleasant sound. This was different from seeing all the others go - this was gut-wrenching.
Her fingers tightened for a few moments, her gaze containing fear, hurt, and a sliver of hope. “Thank you,” she muttered, making you swallow away the lump in your throat, “Thank you for being my friend through this all.”
For a second, you gazed over your shoulder to beckon over Gi-hun, who had been meekly watching the scene unfold in front of him, unsure of how to help out. It was a done deal, anyways, you had whispered in his ear upon finding Sae-byeok fatally wounded in the bathroom earlier. The scent of death already hung in the air, and it stood behind the thick metal doors, patiently awaiting the very moment Sae-byeok would exhale for the final time.
“Mister,” she told Gi-hun, voice feeble and almost too quiet to be heard. “You better look after your lady, you hear me?”
Gi-hun let out a pained noise, but could not find the right words. “Promise me you’ll look after (Y/n). Get her out of here, like you had been planning for.”
Your eyes shot towards your lover, whose gaze was fixated upon your dying friend. “I wish I had been here to see it.” Sae-byeok said with a tease of a smile, “Oh, it hurts. My goodness, it hurts.”
You took a deep breath, blinking at her. “See what?” you quizzed, “Wishing to see what?”
Sae-byeok seemed to beam for a second, a genuine smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. “You’ll find out, (Y/n).” Tears suddenly spilled from her eyes and slid over her damaged cheeks. You couldn't keep your face dry, either, a dry sob leaving your throat.
Pressing your trembling lips against her clammy forehead, your shoulders began to shake. “Sae-byeok, no…”
Gi-hun’s hands rested on your back in an attempt to comfort you, but the woman’s grip on you soon faded. “(Y/n), it’s okay.”
You shook your head, wrapping your arms around Sae-byeok’s body as the final life slipped from her. “No, it’s not okay!”
“Player 67, eliminated.” The voice echoed through the room, and Sang-woo’s tapping halted momentarily. The cry that left your lips chilled Gi-hun to the bone, and the obnoxious chime of more won being added to the piggy bank in the ceiling caused your throat to screw shut with anguish. Wailing against her chest, you ignored Gi-hun’s hand on your shoulder which was attempting to pull you off.
“(Y/n), please, I don’t want to see you hurt, either.”
With bloodshot eyes, you looked up upon roughly being yanked away from Sae-byeok, a masked guard appearing in your field of view. Your first instinct was to throw a punch into his gut, but you knew it would only lead to more trouble, and so, you let yourself be pulled against Gi-hun’s familiar chest, burying your face against it.
They lifted her up, carrying her to the black coffin before putting her inside, closing it off with one of those disgustingly mocking lids, as if the pink bow on top was supposed to ease the pain.
You were inconsolable.
Gi-hun gave Sang-woo a look of worry, but the man in question did not share the concern.
“Come on, (Y/n),” Gi-hun whispered into your hair, “Let’s clean you up a bit.”
The guards, at least, did not give you any problems in allowing you into the bathroom together. The sickly pastel walls made your eyes sting.
You snapped out of your daze once you heard the tap running, cold water hitting your wrists, washing off what little keepsake you owned of Sae-byeok. Perhaps the blood under your nails should remain where it was as a reminder of how her death should not be in vain.
Looking up, you found your own reflection in the mirror. Dark circles had appeared under your sullen eyes, and Gi-hun caught your gaze, his eyes softening in worry.
“(Y/n), come on, let’s get this off of you.” He slipped a warm and familiar hand under your bloodstained dress shirt and helped you take it off, the damp fabric clinging to your skin upon the removal.
Gi-hun had seen you naked before, and so you found no embarrassment in his efforts to wash you. He was gentle, his touch bringing a sense of serenity to you, amongst the painful dread of your impending doom breathing down your neck.
“Gi-hun.” you whispered, causing him to look up at you. Your lips trembled before you responded. “Sae-byeok mentioned something to me. What was she talking about?”
You didn’t have long anymore, and you needed to know. This night was going to be the last one together either way.
Something akin to a blush appeared on his cheeks regardless of how grief-stricken his face was, and he gave you a small smile, tucking some hair behind your ear to get a better look of your eyes.
“Let’s get you into something clean first.”
You stared at the blood washing away into the sink. Even the little bit beneath your nails disappeared.
“Gi-hun.” you said his name again, blinking slowly. “Gi-hun, speak to me. I don’t want to lose you, too.”
His gaze snapped up to yours, and his eyes widened, lips parting in dismay. “Oh, I… Uh… (Y/n), I need…” he swallowed thickly, stumbling over his words, “I need you to know something.”
He reached into the pocket of his suit jacket and took out something - a keychain. No, something that once resembled it. It was taken apart and forced to appear smaller, only the metal ring remaining.
“I found this on the floor.” he said, almost too shy to look up at you, “I tried to make it look more like a ring… I know it’s not what you deserve. I know that I am not half the man you deserve, but I wanted to give it to you regardless.”
The ring that sat once on the keychain laid in his palm, and it was jagged around the edges, like it had been forced around a small cylinder-shaped object, perhaps one of the lead pipes in the bathrooms. “Sae-byeok helped me make it. Reckoned she knew better on how large your finger was, I uh…” He paused, looking up to you, “It’s not a real ring, but… I wanted… Want you to marry me.”
Tears sprung into your vision once more, your knees feeling weak. “Oh, Gi-hun, I’m… I don’t know what to say!”
He swallowed, looking like a young puppy that had been scolded by its owner. “So you don’t like it, then? I can understand, I’d also--”
You lunged yourself forward, shutting him up with a firm yet chaste kiss. “Gi-hun,” you muttered upon pulling back after a few seconds of liplock. “It’s beautiful. It’s perfect. Yes, I want to marry you too.”
A sheepish grin spread over his features and he exhaled shakily in relief, as if he couldn’t believe his own ears. “Really?” he breathed, to which you nodded.
“Yes,” you whispered, “Oh, Gi-hun, I’m scared and I’m heartbroken, but I love you.”
The words had left your lips before you could even comprehend it.
Gi-hun stared at you, jaw agape, star-struck by the way you were beaming at him right after you had said those three words he had been longing to hear. “I love you too.” he muttered, stepping closer, hastily shoving the jagged key ring around your finger. It barely fit and scraped your skin, but you couldn’t care less.
It looked beautiful on you, Gi-hun noted, and tucked some hair away from your face, looking at you with a smile that said a thousand words. His eyes were watery, as were yours, and you blinked away the tears that began to build.
“I love you, Gi-hun.”
Kissing him deeply, you snaked your tongue into his mouth with no time to waste, pouring all the emotion you felt into it. There was an edge of desperation in the action, your hands coming to rest on his waist, pulling him into you.
He let out a sound between a whimper and a sigh, afraid that you would slip through his fingers once he released you. You pushed his suit jacket on the floor, the once crisp white shirt stained with blood. Your vigour calmed, grief screwing your throat shut.
Gi-hun rapidly took it off, but your sadness did not fade. “Where will we be at this same time, tomorrow?” you whispered, “If this is our final night together…”
He cupped your face, thumbs caressing your cheeks. His eyes roamed over your face, searching for the right things to say. What was there to say? There was nothing that could make it better, no promises to whisper against your temple, no dream of a future together.
“(Y/n), look at me.” Gi-hun sighed, voice trembling, “If this is our final night together, then I want to spend every second of it with you.”
You swallowed thickly, watching him with widened eyes. One of your hands went to cover his still on your cheek, and he closed the gap between you, claiming your mouth as his.
Gi-hun dared to slip his tongue past your lips, tasting you deeply, relishing in the flavour of you. He felt the misery in your movements. Your hands went to his bare chest, palms clammy and inexplicably cold. He wondered what you were thinking.
Pinning you against the sink, Gi-hun allowed you to loll your face to the side, pressing his teeth against your neck instead. He sucked firmly, not caring if he’d leave any marks. A whimper left your throat, your fingers tangling into his hair, coaxing at the back of his head. Your lover - now fiancé - pulled one leg over his hip, pressing his pelvis against you.
The familiar swell was there, and you palmed him through his slacks, feeling him twitch with want. He smiled, letting out a sound against your skin, sending vibrations of pleasure down your spine, shooting straight to your core.
Tonight, you needed each other more than ever. Every touch, every flutter of fingers on skin, every time your gaze crossed his, there was a hint of sorrow. The bags under your eyes, the injury on his cheekbone which you had so lovingly kissed earlier right before dinner, the telltale signs of exhaustion that seeped through your veins.
When his tongue slid over your throat towards the spot between your breasts, you threw back your head and bit your bottom lip lest you let your anguish get the better of you. His warmth was intimately welcome, and so you let him slip off your bra, nipples hardening in the cool air of the restroom.
“Gi-hun,” you breathed when his mouth roamed over one of the sensitive buds, dark eyes looking up at you with lust-blown pupils. He licked it gently, your breathing becoming ragged against him, and you inhaled sharply at the feel. Gi-hun switched sides, nipple becoming slick with his saliva, and you wished for this sight to never leave your mind ever again. “Please, I need you.”
His eyes fluttered albeit for a second, tears brimming when he heard your despair. “I need you so bad.” you repeated, which he took as the sign to sink down on his knees. He pressed his face against your thigh, pulling aside your knickers, exposing your wet pussy to his loving eye. You wanted to be seen by nobody else ever again.
Mouthing at your folds, he sucked them against his tongue - slowly, gently - and you felt your chest tighten with pleasure. You put your hand over your mouth to prevent your moan from spilling, but what would it matter if it did? The guards knew what was going on in here, otherwise they would have knocked on the door already.
“Never in my decades on this Earth,” Gi-hun mused against your soaked flesh, lapping at your slit like a starving man, “Have I ever tasted anything as exquisite as your arousal, (Y/n).”
You could not suppress the smile at his cheesy remark, and you chewed your bottom lip when he tongued your clit, sucking gently on the swollen bundle of nerves. “Oh, Gi-hun,” you murmured, “Gi-hun…”
His name was all you knew, and you shivered, goosebumps appearing on your skin. “Gi-hun, please…”
He stood, sensing your orgasm creeping up on you. The whimper got stuck in your throat, for you knew that he wasn’t done with you yet. Gi-hun kissed you deeply, making you taste yourself, and you moaned into his mouth, undoing his trousers with practised ease. His length was fully erect, the slit wet with precum, your hand closing around his cock to jerk him off a few times.
Gi-hun sighed against your lips, eyes opening slightly to watch your face. The sight of you kissing him alongside the feeling of your fingers caressing his cock made him grunt in pleasure. In turn, the sound caused you to move towards him out of instinct. Right away, you dropped onto the floor, pressing open mouthed kisses over his base.
He gritted his teeth, throwing back his head in pleasure. With a shivering exhale, he laced one hand through your hair, letting you lick and suck all over his glistening erection. He tasted wonderful, and you took your time to suckle on his testicles, enjoying the sounds that left his lungs. Gi-hun was never quiet when it came to sex, and in the heat of this very moment, he let out a delicious moan.
You felt your stomach clench, pure need coursing through you. Humming around him, you closed your eyes, sucking him against your tongue. You released his cock from your grip, allowing it to rest against your face, feeling the weight of it twitch whilst you mouthed at his testicles.
“Oh, shit, (Y/n),” Gi-hun moaned, “You’re so beautiful.”
You blinked away the sudden tears blurring your vision, letting him go, rising to your feet but not before pressing a lingering kiss against the head of his cock, tasting him on your lips.
“I want you inside of me.” you whispered when his hands came to rest on your bare waist, and he pushed you backwards against the sink. You bumped into it, his body taking the spot in between your legs, porcelain of the sink dangerously creaking.
“Against the wall, baby, against the wall.” you told him, but he didn’t seem to hear you, too occupied with pressing his face against your neck. His mop of dark hair tickled you and you sighed, biting the inside of your cheek, gasping when you felt his heat press against your entrance.
He bottomed out swiftly, groaning at the familiar feel of your walls clenching around him. His erection swelled inside you and you sighed deeply, bracing yourself against his chest whilst he stretched you. No matter how often you had sex before, he felt closer than ever, stars already speckling your vision as well as the burn of unshed tears.
Gi-hun felt marvellous inside of you. Almost too good. It was unfair. He leaned in, kissing you, his tongue finding yours in an all-consuming kiss.
His hips moved, slow thrusts landing against your pelvis. Pleasure. Salt.
In the sweetness of the kiss, a few tears disrupted the flavour. Gi-hun pulled back in puzzlement, his heart clenching in his chest upon witnessing your wet cheeks.
“My dear (Y/n), oh, my honey bun.”
Under any other circumstances, you would have beamed at the nickname. Now, it only made your heartache worse. You cupped his chin, holding it tightly between your hands.
He was beautiful.
“Look at me while you take me.” you whispered, “Please, don’t look away.”
His brow furrowed, albeit for a moment. “Of course.” he said, slowly moving in and out of you, your slick causing him to speed up eventually.
You completed him, he realised, taking one of your hands into his, bringing it to his lips to kiss it. His other rested on your waist, making sure you were secure against the sink. The light didn’t make it for a romantic environment, but it didn’t matter. You and him were the only people left in this universe, now.
Tears damaged your cheeks as your eyes grew red. A mixture of pleasure and sorrow made for a bittersweet knot in your stomach. You weren’t far off, but you didn’t want this moment to end.
Being one with Gi-hun was what made you long for him even more. The world would be different in hours to come, and you just wanted to close your eyes and never wake up again.
You’d go through anything if it meant not losing him. In this very moment, you realised how deep your love for him ran. It was expressed through salty tears and a trembling lip. You didn’t dare to look away, afraid that he might fade in front of your very eyes.
“(Y/n)?” Gi-hun quizzed, still fucking into you, unsure if what he was doing was right. You began to nod, pressing your forehead to his.
“Yes, Gi-hun. I’m here. I’m yours.”
“Forever and always.” he whispered, and you let out a hum that sounded more like a cry, a pained sound that shook your lover to the bone.
“I need you so bad.” you muttered, feeling yourself clench around him. It was difficult to fight against your own high, and something you had never expected yourself to do so. He was perfect, fit inside of you like you were made for each other, and the sight of his adoring gaze was enough to pull you over that edge.
You cried when you came, but no sound left your lips. Your toes and fingers felt funny at the sensation, your walls clenching around his length, instinctively claiming him to stay inside. It was intense and heart-shattering.
Suddenly, Gi-hun was crying too.
You were the most ethereal being on Earth. He had already died and you were an angel. He cupped your face and kissed you, open-eyed, an almost awkward exchange of love. He could not afford to look away, not even when his orgasm washed over him, pulses of sperm shooting inside of you, deeply planting itself near your cervix.
He panted, sweat leaking down his chest and torso. Staring at each other, you remained like that for minutes, eventually catching your breath, and his once erect cock began to shrink inside of you, causing you to flinch upon removal. The spot between your legs grew cold rapidly, and what remained of his cum leaked down your thighs soon enough.
“Oh, Gi-hun.” you muttered with trembling lips, your legs feeling weak in a negative way for once, “Gi-hun, I love you so much.”
His eyes fluttered shut, tears spilling from the corners when the cold of the bathroom surrounded him. “I love you too, my (Y/n)...” he whispered gently, followed by minutes of silence. You stood in each other’s presence, vulnerable and naked in one another’s arms, your eyes staring at each other’s souls.
The makeshift ring sat uncomfortably around your finger when you brought your hand to rest on his cheek, but you felt closer to Gi-hun than ever before.
“We’re with only three people left,” said he all of a sudden, breaking the silence. “We could vote to quit these damned Games.”
You slowly blinked, tears still leaking over your face. “Oh, Gi-hun, and what about their deaths? The old man, Sae-byeok, Ali? Should they be in vain for the sake of our love? If we quit now, nothing will have changed. Their deaths would have been for nothing. Are we truly that selfish?”
The little hope in his eyes saddened upon their mention, and he blinked slowly, his brow furrowing deeply. “Who says that there can be only one winner?” he muttered, “What if we can win together?”
You shook your head in disbelief, stroking his cheeks, fingers lingering at the small wound on his cheekbone. “Oh, Gi-hun, what I wouldn’t give for that to be possible.”
His hands came to rest on your elbows, and your bodies were growing cold in the afterglow of your intimacy. “We can always hope. We will not know until tomorrow. And before that time comes…”
You stepped into his arms, allowing him to embrace you tightly. Skin upon skin, you pretended that everything was alright, that you’d return home tomorrow, together.
“Before that time comes,” he clarified, “I want to be one with you.”
The guards had been respectful tonight, you noticed. Perhaps you had had enough grief for one day, though you had almost forgotten about your late friends passing on.
Gi-hun held you close, nearer than ever. You loved him more than life itself.
Home, you realised, was not the place where you would return to if tomorrow turned out to be in your favour.
Home would not be the place where you would return to if you chose to quit the Games.
Home, you felt more than ever before, was right here in front of you, surrounding you like a blanket of warmth and love, and no one in this world would ever be able to take him from you, no matter what tomorrow would bring.