1994 i grew up in a yellow house the walls were thin as bone boys with guns under their jeans in the street & i grew up in a snow-filled town wild dogs hid behind fences eleven & smoking weed in the forest i grew up waiting for buses i grew up wanting to be prom queen i grew up kissing boys with skateboards & sleepy eyes i grew up stealing hairspray i grew up huffing paint thinner in the bathrooms of that high school everybody knew i grew up with my head in his lap smell of leather & cigarettes grew up painting Christmas trees in hospital hallways grew up painting my nails pink on the porch in the projects of west alabama grew up in michigan with boys who gave their girlfriends dead baby rabbits grew up in a trailer hungry & wanted grew up in a secret-soaked house where i ran blind with knives & she drank wine & cried when he left & said on the answering machine i’m not coming back until that little bitch is gone he meant me grew up knowing how to leave grew up in a million dollar mansion built over a beach under gray sky got high & hit a boy on the lips for taking my clothes off grew up saying daddy stop while my mother screamed shut up i grew up filled with city lights & my life is all bee stings & dirty knees grew up never surrendering, grew up the color of blood, grew up fast, grew up small, grew up needy, grew up burning, grew up like a comet blown like trash over your city, grew up like a child does, am one still Think the world is beautiful
