Thousand Autumns
“Men are born evil. I wonder if there is anyone who remains as devoted as ever despite all setbacks. If there is, Ah-Qiao, will you be the one?”
Do not go gentle into that good night, do not peacefully surrender to extermination.
Earth's magnetic field disappeared, mutated organisms invaded, the end of the world is near. A little mushroom from the Abyss makes its way into a human base on the search for the spore it has lost, and runs into The Arbiter Lu Feng. One human, one not, they meet at the end of the world and get to know each other, and together they walk into a future in which the only thing certain is uncertainty…
Ask anyone who has listened to Little Mushroom's audio drama and it is almost certain that they will tell you that it was one of the best produced audio dramas they have ever had the pleasure to experience.
You can find the whole thing - with English subs even - on 猫耳FM/missevan, so if this piece of media has ever been on your radar (and even if it hasn't!), let this be the sign that you should join this pit.
I haven't seen any translation of the trailer, so I took a stab at it. Excuse the violation of the maximum recommended CPS count, but there wasn’t much I could do about it... you might need to pause the video at times :P
Some notes on this translation under the cut.
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Because I am both lazy and hate articulating my thoughts, this will not so much be me providing much actual insight on translation choices than just some disjointed notes on the back-translation process of Dylan Thomas' poem "Do not go gentle into that good night".
An overly literal back-translation of the Chinese poem:
不要温和地走入那个良夜。// Do not go gentle into that good night,
我们应在日暮之时燃烧。// We should burn in the hour the sun sets,
怒斥、怒斥光阴的消逝。// Rage, rage at the vanishing of time and light.
尽管智者深知黑暗终将到来。// Even if the wise are fully aware that darkness will inevitably come.
尽管他们的话语无法再迸发出闪电。// Even if their words are unable to make lightning burst forth again.
不要温和地走入那个良夜。// Do not go gentle into that good night.
在这悲哀的山巅。// Here, on the sorrowful mountaintop.
请用你的眼泪诅咒我、祝福我。// Please curse me, bless me with your tears.
不要温和地走入那个良夜。// Do not go gentle into that good night.
Notes on the Chinese translation of the poem:
The refrains (“Do not go gentle into that good night” and “Rage, rage against the dying of the light”) basically map one to one to the English original, which makes it easily recognizable as Dylan Thomas’ poem
This makes the other changes feel very much like deliberate choices on the author's part, even if they do leave me puzzled
No references to the gendered figures (wise men, my father)
In the second verse, 尽管 is repeated for emphasis where it wasn’t in English
Why is the line 在这悲哀的山巅 so much shorter than all others? The original English poem has 10 syllables per line, but the Chinese one is…just whatever. No discernible structure here, only vibes
山巅 (mountaintop) where in the English it’s an unspecified “height” and can be read metaphorically, while here it is very much a physical location. (I mean, of course it could be read metaphorically as well in Chinese but there are many other words you could have chosen that do not have "mountain" in them.) Might or might not have been a deliberate choice referencing [spoiler] Base
I thought it prudent to back-translate the poem since there are some changes and they aren’t that minor.
Back-Translation process:
Pretended the original didn’t exist and translated it off the Chinese alone
Compared it to the original and modified it so that it still stayed 95% faithful to the Chinese while calling back to the original
Tried to keep the ABA rhyme scheme and felt powerful af when I managed to make the 2nd line in all the tercets rhyme
Squished or stretched the lines into 10 syllables, while still keeping as close to both Chinese and English as possible
Despair. Because at this point I should maybe just have used the original poem or gone for a freer translation, what am I even trying so hard for when this comes nowhere close at all to the original
What I ended up using in the subs of the AD Trailer, ABA ryhme scheme, 10 syllables per line if you squint*
不要温和地走入那个良夜。 // Do not go gentle into that good night.
我们应在日暮之时燃烧。 // We ought to burn the hour nightfall nears.
怒斥、怒斥光阴的消逝。// Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
尽管智者深知黑暗终将到来。 // Though the wise know darkness will bring its blight.
尽管他们的话语无法再迸发出闪电。 // Though their words no longer fork lightning fierce.
不要温和地走入那个良夜。 // Do not go gentle into that good night.
在这悲哀的山巅。// Here, on top of sorrowful mountain's height.
请用你的眼泪诅咒我、祝福我。 // Please, I ask, curse me, bless me with your tears.
不要温和地走入那个良夜。// Do not go gentle into that good night.
*and pronounce hour with 2 syllables
Some thoughts on translation choices, apparently:
Actually, the back-translating went quite smoothly and it really is just one line that unexpectedly turned out harder than expected. Or maybe I made it harder than it should have been, who knows. I might be prone to overthinking. It's 尽管智者深知黑暗终将到来 which I ultimately rendered as "Though the wise know darkness will bring its blight." Here, I ended up straying quite far from both Chinese and the original. This is also where I have to thank both @hardwareabstractionlayer and @fwoopersongs for talking translation choices with me.
Some other options here would have been "Though the wise know at last dark will alight" / "Though the wise know dark will come as it might" / "Though the wise know in the end dark is right", but none of them felt fitting. Either the line was not quite proper english, or it failed to convey the the inevitability of 终将到来, or it felt too much like a pale imitation of the original etc etc.
Usually, I am the kind of person who translates rather literally and doesn't take too many liberties. Here though, "blight" simply works absolutely amazing in the context of Little Mushroom. Credit for that suggestion goes to hal, who nailed two major story settings with it, despite not knowing much about the book except for whatever 2am thoughts I fling at her. You see, after the Earth's magnetic field disappeared, humans had to build an artificial magnetic field to protect themselves from deadly cosmic radiation and infected organisms. Due to the magnetic field, an aurora dances all over the globe. The moment that light vanishes, it means the magnetic field did too, which signifies the end of mankind. Dark *does* literally bring its blight. It's brilliant, really.
[DL SUB] MACHINE ELEMENTS STAGE： EINS 「SORA WO WATARU KAZE」
This might be one of my quickest translations ever. I can't believe I was able to get this done within 20 days. This time, I had the lovely @/shigatsuflowers help me with proof-reading~! Thank you Mei!! Your help was soo much appreciated!
If anyone needs a reminder about the world itself. You should check out @tsukiprotranslations translations for the AGF theme which I've linked here~
Honestly speaking, I never expected to see a soft Hajime and Agata really pulled soft!Hajime well. Also, I really liked how each group was given similar screen time. This isn't even including how my jaw dropped at how this is considered to be Tsukino Empire's sequel.
If anyone is debating on whether to buy this stage or not, they really should. It's definitely worth it. You can buy it from here or here.
Also, in the link below, there will be a file for notes. Do give it a read since it would give further insight to my translations. Other than that, I really hope you enjoy the stage show as much as I did ^_^
Next Project: Cyber Dive Connection Subs~ Will be out in a month (this time for sure!).
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※DOWNLOAD SUBS: LINK
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