“people will like you more!” but you’ll drive away all of your friends and poison all of your relationships. you’ll isolate yourself from your family until no one recognizes you anymore. when did you become so cruel?
“you’ll be beautiful!” but your hair will lose its shine and fall out in clumps. your teeth will ache and rot, and you’ll have bags under your eyes like violet bruises. people keep telling you that you look sick.
“you won’t feel so sluggish!” but you won’t be able to think straight and your grades will plummet. you’ll feel so cold all the time, your heart struggling to beat in your chest. you’ll wonder where all of your energy went. why can’t you remember anything? what day is it?
“you won’t have to get your period!” but you might never be able to have children. amenorrhea is a sign that your body is starting to shut down, and that your bones are withering away. you never thought you’d have osteoperosis at such a young age.
“you’ll stop after a few more pounds!” but you won’t because you can’t and it’ll take over your life until you can’t think about anything else, can’t breathe, can’t quit until it’s too late. it will never be enough.
“you’ll have clear skin!” but it’ll be so dry that it’s always peeling, and acne might bloom on your skin like angry blisters. fur-like lanugo will grow all over your body and face in an attempt to keep your blood circulating.
“you won’t be bloated!” but your digestive system will be severely damaged, and you’ll be constipated all the time. you’ll get cramps that hurt so bad you can’t move. you can’t believe it when the doctor tells you that you need major surgery.
“you’ll sleep better!” but you might develop insomnia or sleep apnea and you’ll lie awake at night, every night, your stomach burning. your mind fighting off food cravings that are so vivid they make your mouth water. you’ll cry silently into your pillow as the hours go by, desperate to close your eyes and rest.
“you’ll be healthier!” but all of your organs will shut down as your body falls apart. you’ll whittle away years off of your life, but what kind of life is this anyway? living but not living, existing only for the sake of seeing the number on the scale go down down down until you end up in a hospital room.
“you’ll be more confident!” but you’ll never be satisfied, and your motivation will blossom into a deep self-hatred that will only get stronger. how much must you loathe yourself in order to deny yourself a basic need for survival?
“you’ll be happier!” but you won’t. because it’s not about losing weight, not really. it’s deeper than that. you’ll never be happy this way, and you won’t heal unless you choose to.
eating disorders are not pretty. it’s never too late to recover.
jimmyeatworldofficial
pixelskylines
theartofmadeline
amandla
areudirty
stormborns
blakekathryn
gummygunk
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