Glorious Dreams @gloriousdreams-blog1 - Tumblr Blog

You really think I cant voice my rights

You assume I'm weak

Or that you would handle it better

That I have it all but am ungratefull

You like to stay in your illusion

Assuming youre protecting your honor

While youre in a losing game

There is no person who really cared about you

They all use you

Just like they did to me

Im annoyed at appearances

They dont say anything about a person

Its deception most of us fall for

A pretty face

Thinking that gives you the right to attract a good partner

We're so delusional

Gullable

Distance

I dont miss you anymore

You cant hurt me like you used to do

But you do still try to control me

I hate this part

I dont know if this will change

The truth is

You still have control

Betrayal

Stay there, live there

Dont come back

Dont even touch me

Dont look at me

My respect is gone

Im so disappointed

Slipped away

My love caused you to slip away

You fully embraced me at first

Or did you not?

I noticed the busy mind

Not fully present

Always wandering

Its funny and sad

How you completely disappeared

And i longed for the person Ive just met

You wont return

Panick attacks

Realising my world is to crumble down

To the ground

I feel the shaking

I feel the pain

Im not okay?

Im not okay.

Im not okay!

I didnt like seeing you

I didnt think you were beautiful

I couldnt see how you would look like

I didnt understand what I was seeing

Seeing you made me realise

You should have stayed with me

Safe

Youre now on your own

Nothing I can do

But to hold your hand

Im hopeless

Im out of control

I just hope youll survive

My babygirl

You came too early

I tried again for a hundred times

But ill do it this time a bit different

Have no control of life

No control over your death

No control over your destiny

True failure

Death

I ask the death to take me

He doesnt answer any of my calls

I feel like life took total control of me

And ive lost any kind of control

Im just pushing buttons

And hoping itll end good

No control

Live and be taken over

Or die and end this control

I cant seem to take control

I ignored the feeling

The feeling of hurt

That he didnt answer my love

Hes too busy

Its just the way it is

Then it hit me

Am i deluding myself as the relationship is breaking slowly

I suspect every thing

Why did he shower that time

Why is he coming back so late

Is there something hes hiding

I dont want to know

I feel like im doomed

I want to hide myself from this world

Parties

I hated them

I wanted to be alone

Run away and live somewhere unnoticed

No luxury but poor and humble people

Now im surrounded with luxury

I feel the pressure to invite everyone and have a houseparty

Tensions between families

Happiness of my children

I feel like running away

I feel like failing

No help no care, call me a orphan

A woman who loved to be alone and who was left alone

Only to be pressured

To be with everyone

Never loved

I thought I was loved

I felt the pain of betrayel

But I thought i would be loved

I thought I had it all figured out

Only to find myself in a ditch

Which i cant climb out

Only to realise

Im too naive and weak

Never loved

Only used or thrown away

Eager to know everything

I wish i wasnt eager to know everything

So i could focus on what I already knew

And meet the excitement to learn more

Phased instead of rush to know

Lived by not living

The day liberately takes the steeringwheel

And I enjoy while I relax

Losing focus way too long

Just so regret comes and takes control

In control

Finally the feeling of control came

I can achieve and build a future for me and my family

The hurt was a visitor

Now hes finally gone and he made room for joy

Talking solves nothing

I run my mouth

I threw up my feelings

I had enough of holding it inside

It gave me nothing

It solved nothing but gave me more problems

I have to solve everything myself

Talking solves nothing

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