[YOU MUST CHANGE YOUR LIFE]

Poems by Elias I.K.B. Companion project/reference text for Eliza Gauger's Problem Glyphs. Poems are divided into five demeanors: lucent, warlike, peregrine, febrile and fulsome. Some content may be triggering.

[problemglyphs]

16/09/2015 20:09:59

I have every hope and dream in the world for my future. But not a single ounce of motivation to do any of it.

[glyphpoems]

between my port and starboard ribs

i’m as rusty as a shipwreck and half as 

grounded. my bones are culled from giant

bones; who else feels like a discard or as if

some hero was supposed to pilot their 

frame to greatness. instead, there’s us: 

as flame to sullen coals. we can hope that

we are arch enough underfoot as

to be noticed by angels. we can 

hope to give heaven such a wound as

must be addressed. 

[problemglyphs]

12/05/2015 19:11:45

hello, i suffer from borderline personality disorder. i know i myself and many others turn into a beast at such sudden notice its frightening to myself and others. if you can, can i please request a glyph to help protect others from the beast that is this disorder? thank you. have a good day.

[glyphpoems]

half-circles, therefore: 

for every thing there must be an

anti-thing that is just a prefix different.

no longer know night and know

instead “not-day” which is just a negation

of when most of us are awake, doing and saying. 

forget too the day and remember instead the 

swarth plain of sundown. it’s zen by way

of choicelessness. we can see in the dark,

we can close our eyes as necessary. we 

are amphibians, asleep in the riverbeds 

as the snow is impossibly crystal or dull.  

[problemglyphs]

[EVEN STONE IS GRACEFUL]

12/05/2015 18:50:53

I’ve always wanted to be a dancer, but sometimes all I feel like is a lump of rock.

[glyphpoems]

so, subtract. be 

immense and then understand what

isn’t necessary.

be cruel to your limits. like an artist,

or like an ancient star, pare the possibly 

gone and put ink to

the sketch that is

just you without apocrypha.

every painting was found in a blizzard of

erased lines and sacrifice. don’t

be the sacrifice.  

[glyphpoems]

glyph poems are back btw

thank you for your patience, i missed you

[problemglyphs]

13/03/2015 13:03:34

i like the tought of slowly killing myself with my smoking habit. it gives me confort to think i am commiting a small suicide every time i fill my lungs with smoke.

[glyphpoems]

the common metaphor is 

picking scabs, and i understand:

the serrated nail, the jewelish red,

and finally scar filling the pit like snow. 

i think it’s more perfectly like finding

a dead candle behind a loose brick

and remembering why you hid it. something

finished and invincible that was once bright,

reshaped and not destroyed, as unknown

as a sentence ending in a comma. 

[glyphpoems]

glyphpoems is on hiatus for at least another month or so. i am unspeakably grateful for the love and support that you all have given me, but it’s time for me to refocus on other projects for a while. if you like my words i am offering daily Small Po-ems on my other poetry blog, which i will be packaging in groups of 3-4 on my patreon. 

thank you, hail satan, i’ll see you all in bog hell

[problemglyphs]

Anonymous said: 03/03/2015 17:24:32

My family disowned me because they’re religious fundamentalists and I’m studying astronomy – I feel so lost and scared that I’m making the wrong choice by choosing science over faith.

[glyphpoems]

eyes are gore and so don’t

see! gravitas eradico! the sky

rejects all unsuitable and in terrible

ways. there’s no judgement in light,

just those who look and those who

can’t, and faith is most fearsome between

the stars. ask anyone where heaven is

and see where they point. we are

agreed: god is not adverse to scrutiny. 

[problemglyphs]

22/02/2015 16:43:59

im beset with many enemies. its been a year and some change since i transitioned and this garbage has pretty much destroyed me financially, and emotionally. id come to understand the difference between the old immature narrative of thinking “EVERYONE IS AGAINST ME” and then being in a place where i could actually understand that people by and large were hostile to my existence. im trying to stay empathetic but this shit is bigger than me, their idea might outlive them, me and my idea. please curse their idea

[glyphpoems]

somewhere up there is the 

finity of our atomosphere; 

somewhere up there every

beast will starve for breath. ascend

unto death with your pervious eyes and mouth

shut (through the clouds which are the color

of bad white wine) and keep your air

held in until you feel the the grip

of your enemy loosen. outlast, plummet,

return unclad and light

[problemglyphs]

30/03/2015 11:01:59  

I live on the edge of a very wooded mini-city and have developed a crippling fear/paranoia of what’s in the woods at night, specifically what people or things might hide there. I request an image for protection or to ward away creeping predators be they spiritual or the coyotes that watch my cat through the window. thankyou!

[glyphpoems]

every two trees makes an arch. it is not

unlike a city. a street is a caesura 

between one building and another; 

its just civic planning writ small or titanic. 

i grew up waking wary of crickets and frogs,

braking for turkeys and the terrified deer. there

were wolves but they knew buckshot and .22s

better than we did. past 6AM any light is

a human contrivance and they

fear it or die. 

[problemglyphs]

Anonymous said: July 5th 2014, 10:04:00 pm  

when i’m alone i find that a lot of my private thoughts are angry (at the state of the world, at the state of my mind, that i don’t have the power to change either). i could use a glyph to channel that fury into my writing so it does something more than uselessly fester.

[glyphpoems]

honey never rots, and

we eat no honey that wasn’t stolen. 

what can we learn from this?

it has unspeakable origins, and

will partake of the extinction of

its makers. it kills the little

evil things of the world by touch

but not us. it is a careful alkaline. 

perhaps, being giants, we are

too great to be killed by honey,

or perhaps

it is the memory

that will kill us, when it’s gone

[problemglyphs]

Anonymous said:

I am generally happy and do not suffer from depression but occasionally I tumble into a rage spiral. Nothing can pull me out of it and even things that are happy, cute, or lovely only serve to intensify my anger. I need something to bring me out of it. Something to direct the anger, like a maze of some sort.

[glyphpoems]

the stars are loud tonight. i’m

often in poor weather and badly

rained upon and then heavy and

cold as them above who wear

the clouds as a veil and coquette 

between them. these are the conditions

that invite the dead. all the past is dead

and unquiet and every day the eulogy of the

last and it’s enough to make your teeth grow and

your nails covet skin. walk as one who suffers

much. the world is wrong and the devil

immanent and rain falls on all alike 

[problemglyphs]

Anonymous said: November 6th 2013, 1:12:00 am  

your glyphs are beautiful; thank you for doing them. i’m not sure if you’ve done one for this, but the fatigue that comes with my depression is more than i can handle. it makes me fall behind, and that triggers other symptoms of my depression, and it’s a vicious spiral that i can’t get out of. i need energy, and the fortitude to see my way out of this.

[glyphpoems]

we need tautology 

that our cycles dont decay

into spirals, to reason the

burn that will keep us near

to center w/o correction. to

breed a fever that eats infection. 

because we can’t trust ourselves

tomorrow. stalking our next

iteration with dread, living mostly

between “im going to fuck

this up” and fucking up.

addressing our next self,

with belied civility, like “hey,

don’t

fuck this up”

[problemglyphs]

Anonymous said: November 4th 2013, 8:24:00 pm  

people have said i have artistic talent but i never accomplish or finish anything and i don’t think that’s going to change because i’m sick and depressed and perfectionistic and trash

[support Problem Glyphs on Patreon]

[glyphpoems]

so much has changed. so

yr heart is rimed or yr gut

rheumy?

w/ your teeth you can cut &

your fingers can knot. theres nothing

else to it but severing + mending in = measure. 

look,

if youre reading this its because youre

@ least a little better @ living than you are @ dying  

so cut thread with your front teeth and loom it

or in 100 years they will find nothing

if you do not do at least that

[problemglyphs]

Glyph: [AUTOTOMY]

Problem:

Anonymous said:

September 19th 2014, 5:53:00 pm

The person I thought I was cared about me stopped talking to me and I don’t understand how someone can take so much from me. I feel like they took my heart with them.

[glyphpoems]

wan. my eyes are wan.

wan vs. vis.       i think. 

i'm sure i can die of whatever

disease this is.      ill eyes

can't look.        my bones

are an odd ore.     bend to

brandished looks.      i don't make

much sense.    did i before?     was

i once?     what worth is this. 

again, i think: this isn't like before

[problemglyphs]

Glyph: [STELLAR DRIFT]

Problem:

Anonymous said:

November 5th 2013, 2:10:00 am

I’m so alone, but I can’t imagine why anyone would even like me enough to be my friend.

(Problem Glyphs on Patreon)

[glyphpoems]

when even in windowpanes you

see your sins remembered, when

the choral verse of your days is

aginbit or achewood; when you

dwell in comparison, are companion

a great and uncertain debt: look up.

your hell is common in ways you don't

suspect. if heaven came to harrow you 

would not be killed. look for the blood

carelessly smeared on brow, doorframe,

marks across any length of vein. pay attention.

i'm here. i'm there. i've been.

[problemglyphs]

Glyph: [ALL QUIET]

Problem:

November 4th 2013, 7:59:00 pm  

I’m scared of the unkown and because of that, scared of move forward in life because things might change. I’m scared of change. I’m scared of being scared.

[x]

[glyphpoems]

stolen intonation helps. crimes

of mimesis and prosody. words

you hold tight in the hand so the

edges cut. locks of hair from your

enduring books. borrowing shakespeare's

dancing shoes as he's dead and doesn't

dance unless you do it for him. this is

a way to progress. there are others,

each with matching crux: steal

what you need, if nobody will miss

it.

[problemglyphs]

Glyph: [HALF-LIFE]

Problem:

July 9th 2014, 6:43:00 pm  

I am mildly manic-depressive and I regularly fuck up my relationships by being incredibly sweet one minute and then sinking into a depression the next. When depressed I tend to start firing emails to my girlfriend blaming her for my problems. I always regret it: she’s great at helping me face my moods in person, but she’s devastated when she gets my angry email tirades. I need a reminder that it is wise to take a breath, take time out and stay away from the keyboard when I feel like shit.

[x]

[glyphpoems]

yeah you

wake up jumbled sometimes

and chase fey notions thru

glass necks or up the old 

anchorite pole but pieces fall

to earth, child. that's the one

constant. whatever's left

of you will always rain

like vulcan's cough upon

the innocent bewitched. 

your guilt is the angel's share,

and burns first