Goddamn Webcomics!

In this blog, we look at obscure and weird webcomics all around the internet. THIS IS NOT AN ANTI-WEBCOMIC BLOG. Our intention is to give a page-by-page analysis of works that are both popular and lesser known, of course sometimes we give a beating to an awful webcomic that deserves it, but we're mostly trying to be a blog that gives out fair critique. This blog uses strong language and hyperbole a lot. This blog respects webcomics as a medium, so if your webcomic is in the rifflist, consider it an honour. Go to the Riff Portal to look at our past riffs.

[goddamnwebcomics]

I don't know why I said Koz was charismatic and eccentric. He's more erratic and unstable. Like a lot of the males, he's horny and stupid, yet has some sense of loyalty to Frederick and the Duchess. Doesn't stop him from being a disobedient annoyance who gets way too much screentime, even more than Murphy somehow.

It's completely fair especially since it's probably been a long while since you last read this.

With that being said, I have only one reaction to what you just said.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

[goddamnwebcomics]

Double Replies

You’re official in Rackenroon now, and if the stock photos and images weren’t blatant enough, they are going to be pushed to their limits further down the line. It either makes or breaks one’s enjoyment of exploring a new setting in one of the biggest locations Carry On has to depict, with how often it clashes against the cast.

Kathy can’t draw a detailed background to save her own life, so I wouldn’t be surprised if she starts incorporating generative art in the future.

Reply

In a better comic, learning more about these characters’ lives and backgrounds would be an interesting exploration. This is a new setting, and we’re unfamiliar with the daily lives, culture, and norms of these boys, so I will give some credit for Kathy trying to provide some. Too bad every single character introduced has less depth than the budding romance between the two main leads. Kathy has to work with a much larger cast compared to the Pre-Rackenroon days, all of which would take far too much time to focus on and develop, so expect most of them to either disappear, become irrelevant and add nothing, or never get the proper focus they deserve.  

Reply

You see this? You see how these two were utterly cocked blocked? Expect to see this joke get repeated for at least six years before they finally fuck each other. 

Oh great I hate everything. Yet the one character Kathy wants to focus on the most is a fucking hateable would be rapist and a guy who almost tried to fire a gun into a crowd??? And oh cool, cockblocking jokes. It was funny when Albert Temple did it once.

But if we are constantly going to see Kathy and Limpdick do their disgusting foreplay, then maybe they deserve to get cockblocked. And oh my god, I hope I have put the comic on hold before I see Kathy draw a sex scene.

The background stuff is just sad, everything is copy and pasted from real life locations. I would give it credit if she kept mix and matching real photos like in some of the other backgrounds but it’s gonna get worse and never get better. Let me know when Kathy starts integrating AI into her art even if it spoils the rest of the comic. It is one thousand percent going to happen. 

[goddamnwebcomics]

Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME

This can't be real. Kathy used a picture of a fucking furry convention to depict a crowd of anthropomorphic animals, despite the fact there's several furries in that crowd who don't really fit this comic's art at all.

This is both hilarious and infuriating as hell. Kathy could have just used a crowd of real people blurred or hell, just drawn a splodge of grey matter like SHE DID DURING THE ARTHROCON CROWD SCENES.

If this is Kathy's new method of taking shortcuts, then at least that's going to provide more comedy than Carry On ever has.

Shooting into a crowd is very consistent with hateful ideologies, so this is not unrealistic at all.

Yeah I don't fucking believe at all if Spitfuck says "I'd aimed over their heads". This guy was going to flash his three feet long penis and force it down Sandy's throat and he says he enjoys hitting rocks over people's heads. It's impressive how he is quickly becoming the new worst Carry On character. Again, Kathy thinks THIS IS CHARMING. If Limpdick is Drake Lupus this guy is Vick.

[tjimmy1999]

This guy was going to flash his three feet long penis and force it down Sandy’s throat and he says he enjoys hitting rocks over people’s heads. It’s impressive how he is quickly becoming the new worst Carry On character.

As a reminder, this guy is both favored by the author and the fans. It really makes you see how much people really take advantage of the charismatic, eccentric sociopath trope if they find this womanizing idiot (who never gets to use his sniper skills for anything beneficial) amusing. Kathy sure as hell can't pull it off.

[goddamnwebcomics]

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

Oh jesus fucking christ, how did they make a character more HATEABLE than fucking Limpdick??? Yet they find him CHARMING AND CHARISMATIC? Jesus fucking christ Carry On's readerbase is somehow even stupider than Connor Davidsons.

[goddamnwebcomics]

Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME

This can't be real. Kathy used a picture of a fucking furry convention to depict a crowd of anthropomorphic animals, despite the fact there's several furries in that crowd who don't really fit this comic's art at all.

This is both hilarious and infuriating as hell. Kathy could have just used a crowd of real people blurred or hell, just drawn a splodge of grey matter like SHE DID DURING THE ARTHROCON CROWD SCENES.

If this is Kathy's new method of taking shortcuts, then at least that's going to provide more comedy than Carry On ever has.

Shooting into a crowd is very consistent with hateful ideologies, so this is not unrealistic at all.

Yeah I don't fucking believe at all if Spitfuck says "I'd aimed over their heads". This guy was going to flash his three feet long penis and force it down Sandy's throat and he says he enjoys hitting rocks over people's heads. It's impressive how he is quickly becoming the new worst Carry On character. Again, Kathy thinks THIS IS CHARMING. If Limpdick is Drake Lupus this guy is Vick.

[goddamnwebcomics]

This is starting to turn into a youtube poop. What the fuck is going on? Is Kathy seriously cutting and pasting in stuff from real life buildings and photographs without realizing it looks uncanny as all hell? Even ALBERT knew not to do that all the time???

And why is there a huge crowd? I thought they were gonna enter the city in secret. I guess they're all women and Limpdick has to breed them because there's no other men in the city. Oh come on, Kathy has probably had that fantasy too in the past. I honestly bet she loves Limpdick more than she loves her husband.

"That's a low blow GW" yeah so was Kathy making fun of her brother's ex-girlfriend for being transgender and including her in Carry On. Being good =/= civility and kindness.

[goddamnwebcomics]

Oh good, we're back to cross-species racism. I'm surprised The Captain is the racist one. But the real competitive racist is in the room right now.

And we get an irrelevant mention of Dave. Thanks for reminding us he exists and thus proves what a shitty person Sandy is.

I know retired people don't really have much to do but...has she been standing in her balcony looking at the ship the entire day? It's sunset for fucks sakes. Go play golf or something.

[goddamnwebcomics]

We finally see Kiyanti Bay, and oh my fucking god.

Kathy included a photo of Shibam in this fucked up collage of buildings, and if you think that looks familiar, you might've seen this city in...different form.

Yes, the skybox of Wet Dry World from Mario 64 is officially where Kathy's stupid great grandma lives. And may I remind you, this city is in Yemen, a country that is NOT IN AFRICAN CONTINENT.

Hell I could probably look at all the other cities Kathy used for that collage and I bet you none of them match African cities. THERE'S A MEDIEVAL CASTLE WALL FOR FUCKS SAKES.

And Downmarket Abbey, hahahaha, hahahaha, again fuck you.

[goddamnwebcomics]

I am not even going to dignify this sequence of events with a riff.

[goddamnwebcomics]

Oh wow, this scene is happening in symmetry with Kathy-Limpdick cuddling scene, and they leave when Captain shows up. SEE, HE'S THE BAD GUY. Calling it now, Captain will accidentally be the second coming of Lieutenant Hyde rather than an obnoxious sexist bureaucrat. I love the english language, there's so many terms for "person who hates women".

I will give this scene the minimum of credit. We don't really get these "same scene happening from different point of view" scenes that often in webcomics outside of flashbacks because everything is moving moving moving. So this is an interesting touch.

This comic then reminds us that Murphy exists. Fuck you.

[goddamnwebcomics]

Nobody cares. Nobody cares. Nobody cares. Fucking go back to Kathy and the Captain guy. I want to see how badly Kathy fucks up at writing a chauvinist.

[goddamnwebcomics]

How the fuck is THIS making me more uncomfortable than Monster Girl World??? HOOOOWW??? I REALLY don't need to see Kathy giggling and moaning as we see a very detailed look into her crotch. Please NEVER say "mmmmrrmmmm" EVER AGAIN. I'm going to have nightmares about this.

Oh good, we end this fucking uncomfortable scene with an on-looker looking at Kathy and Limpdick's immature fucking cuddling session. These two were the reason why "get a room you two" was invented. I guess Kathy now likes voyeurism or something.

Uhh okay what the fuck is the Captain implying here??? "You had better be the person he thinks you are". Is this going to be the internalized misogynist trying to write an antagonistic misogynist in her story? That is gonna be bad.

[goddamnwebcomics]

NOOOOBODY CARES

Yeah it's official. Limpdick has a ten feet long penis. I'm glad that pointless diatribe about that stupid fucking island that doesn't matter at all led to this moment. This is Kathy Kelloggs once again doing her banal American Pie style writing.

There is probably a drawing out there that showcases Limpdick's penis. I know Kathy Kelloggs has drawn it. She can't deny it. Also I think Kathy the character has been retconned to have a pussy now.

This can't be fucking real. Monster Girl World was less crass than this.

Yeah I have not forgotten my theory despite not bringing it up lately. This is Dimplick in control of Kathy. Not only is he a raging racist he is also somehow the best lover ever. That explains why Limpdick acts like this when he's not in Dimplick mode.

[goddamnwebcomics]

Imagine fantasizing about Limpdick of all characters. Reminder Kathy used to fucking hate him. And Kathy's shitty expressions are not helping, she should think about a REAL MAN for once.

Here's the exploitable, do what your heart desires with it

[goddamnwebcomics]

Reply

I mean, credit where it’s due, the Seinfeld reference is at least a nice touch.

I guess, Kathy, Sandy, Limpdick and Trader Horn wish they had the quarter chemistry of Jerry, George, Elaine and Kramer.

[goddamnwebcomics]

Oh great, we're about to see my least favourite genre of characters come back. Old hyena people.

The background is too good to have been made by Kathy. At the very least it seems to be multiple pics put together, which is less lazy than future backgrounds will be.

[goddamnwebcomics]

I wish I could fall asleep like that albino hyena did.

Man, even with my headcanon, it's impossible to ignore the fact Limpdick is so casual about the fact Trader Horn is suddenly alive like nothing ever happened. Yes, this is perfectly consistent with Kathy's usual bullshit, but I am surprised that these characters don't even emotionally register someone they know coming back to life.

Hell, Trader Horn isn't even taking shots at Limpdick as often as he used to. Absolutely this proves he is an imposter.

[goddamnwebcomics]

We get another song parody, this time it's parodying an obscure christmas carol I Saw Three Ships. Apparently the late great Keith Emerson did his own instrumental remix of it.

It's a stupid page but it's...perfectly inoffensive.

Yeah of course a battleship that's still active has a gift shop. How very american of them. That's the exact same shit as Alligator Alcatraz T-shirts. Let's make shirts of shit that actually fucking kills people. Oh great, I'm mad once again.

Man, is it me or is Kathy drawn like she was drawn back in pre-Rackeroon days again? Maybe I got so used to her being drawn with sexy expressions so often, I am genuinely shocked when she has her signature big bug eyes for more than 3 seconds.

And of course this page references the time she tried to rape Limpdick back in January. Feels like it was last week. This year's going by way too fast.