ON HIATUS

manwendur vainalótë, also known as fëanis. independent and semi-selective silmarillion oc. loved by mars. sideblog to @dominimalitiae.

[goldentailor]

— ≺ About ≻ ∘ ≺ Mobile Version ≻

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— ≺ Permanent starter call ≻

— ≺ Promo ≻

— ≺ Main blog: Melkor and Sauron ≻

[dominimalitiae]

[ Hello, everyone!

I hope life is treating you all kindly. I’m hopping on here to make a quick announcement out of respect for all of those who currently have threads with me or with whom I had stuff planned.

I am putting my blogs on hiatus. Life right now is quite hard and I don’t have the motivation to write here anymore. I won’t deactivate, but I am not sure when and if I will ever be back.

I’m sorry to leave you hanging like that, but this is supposed to be fun and once it becomes a chore, then it’s a sign that something is wrong.

If you wish, I can give my discord to you so as to keep in contact!

Take care!

– Mars ]

[dominimalitiae]

[Once again, sorry for the radio silence!

I have been taking advantage of the holidays to unwind a bit and now I have an assignment coming up soon so I’m focusing on that.

I’m also not feeling very motivated to write lately.

I hope to come back soon. Take care!]

[goldentailor]

thegreatstrongbow​:

It was only a little kiss, but it made Beleg’s face light up, and he took Vaino’s hand, satisfied that they could at least sit here and hold hands, and nothing more. Already, he was thinking of how to woo Vaino, is preious plans now disregarded.

“Do you want to go out of lunch tomorrow? It will be a nice day for walking around the city.”

Vaino nodded enthusiastically. He was happy that everything seemed to be going fine in spite of the conversation they just had. He had been scared of losing Beleg, but now that fear almost seemed foolish: it was clear the elf enjoyed his company as much as Vaino loved his.

“That sounds delightful,” he replied. “I’d really love to.”

[goldentailor]

naganye​:

Aradir watched him for a moment.

“No. That’s it for now. You’ll tell me everything in the end. Come with me and we’ll find you somewhere to sleep,” He stood up and gestured for Vaino to join him, going out towards the sea of tents.

Vaino nodded and, to be fair, he felt quite relieved to hear that he did not have to ask any more questions. He was very shy and sharing personal details to a stranger had proven quite hard.

“Alright, thank you,” he said, raising to his feet and following him.

[goldentailor]

admirableringmaker​:

He could hardly contain his laughter. Schooling his face into a calm expression, he turned to look Vaino, raising a dark eyebrow.

“That was not part of our deal. I said you could leave. I did not say I would make it esy for you, little elf. Why would I want you to go when you have done such plesing work?”

It was cruel, his smirk as cold as ice.

“Run along now. Do try and avoid the Balrogs. They’ll make such  mess of you.”

Vaino was shocked. He could not believe this was really happening: he had been so excited upon seeing that the Maia had been satisfied with his work, already savoring his return home only to watch as he destroyed his hopes with a few words.

“T-they’ll hurt me ...” he muttered, trembling. He had seen those terrible creatures with their fiery whips and he shuddered thinking about what they could do to him. “P-please ... I ... I am n-no match for them ...”

He looked at him with big, blue eyes soon filled with fear. Soon, tears started streaming down his delicate features.

“I ... I c-can’t leave ... I d-don’t know how ...”

[goldentailor]

thegreatstrongbow​:

Yet. That was the word that haunted Beleg. He feared that the Lieutenant would lose patience and hurt Vaino, and then Beleg did not know what comfort he could possibly offer.

As he held him, he stroked his fingers through his hair. Though his hands were rough, work-worn, but his touch was gentle, warm. “I would take your place in a heartbeat, if I did not think my place is no better for you. If I could. Oh, Vaino… what are we to do?”

He tried his best not to look afraid for Beleg’s sake, but it was clear by the look in his eyes that the mere thought of the fallen Maia forcing himself upon him terrified him to his core. So he closed his eyes and tried to focus on the elf’s touch: it was comforting, it almost made him forget his misery.

“No, I would not want you to do that,” he said. “I can bear it. If ... if I’m good, he won’t hurt me. He promised me that ...” He was so naïve that he believed the lieutenant’s words were genuine.

“There’s nothing we can do, I’m afraid. Trying to escape ... it will probably end badly.”

[goldentailor]

thegreatstrongbow​:

“Thank you.” Beleg dressed himself, oblivious to Vaino’s blushing, and turned back to smile at him.

“How long will it take? Shall I come back here to collect it?” A plan was forming in his mind; Vaino had wanted no payment, but that didn’t feel right - perhaps he could come back and take him out to dinner instead. He was a very pretty elf, and dinner seemed like a good way to see more of him.

Vaino gathered his notebook and drawing, putting them away together. He glanced one last time at the design and going over the process so as to make an estimate of how much time he needed.

“Not too long, it is a rather simple design,” he assured with a smile, “I’m confident I’ll have it ready in three days maximum as I do not have a lot of ther projects at the moment. You can either come back here to collect it or I could deliver it to your home, whatever you prefer!”

[goldentailor]

thegreatstrongbow​:

“My dear Vaino.” he murmured softly, watching him for a moment. Truthfully, what greater joy in the world was there any this? He had never seen the Trees, but he could not imagine golden Laurelin’s light was more beautiful than the elf in front of him.

Being looked at with such intensity and love was almost unbearable for Vaino. He shyly looked away, cheeks turning a bight pink. He felt his heart beating fast in his chest and ache with the need to let the elf know just how dear he was to him.

“Beleg ... I love you ...” he muttered.

[goldentailor]

thegreatstrongbow​:

“Oh, I am not upset.” There was nothing to be upset about. Most of the time, he enjoyed talking about his past; it made it feel less lost. And while adapting to life in Valinor was sometimes confusing, he was always grateful for Vaino’s perspective.

“You are always free to ask questions, my Vaino. I do not mind talk about it - most of it is not painful anymore. Lord Námo took care of that.”

“Still, I do not want you to get melancholic about your home,” he said. “I can’t help but feeling like asking you about it is ... quite indelicate.”

He knew, obviously, that the purpose of one’s stay in Mandos was to heal and overcome the trauma of death. Yet, he had never experienced it himself and was not entirely sure about what it meant.

[goldentailor]

gxldenfinwe​:

“You are important to me, though. That is often enough.” Arvo said, thoughtful, as he turned his gaze from the distant glow of the Trees to Vaino.

“If you would give me your hand, I could try and see if I can See anything. I used to do it for practice when Irmo was teaching me.”

He could not help but blush a little at those words. To know that he was important to someone else, that he was loved ... it was all Vaino desired from life. He gave Arvo a kind smile and nodded.

“O-of course ...” he replied and gave his hand, which trembled a little. Suddenly he felt nervous. What if Arvo saw something terrible?

[goldentailor]

naganye​:

“He must have gone through a lot of trouble,” He commented, “What else can you tell me about yourself, darling?” Aradir decided that it would be time to get some rest soon.

“H-he did,” he confirmed, looking down. “Though I still don’t understand why. He did ... he did not ask for money in exchange. I don’t understand what giving me away could possibly mean for him.”

Vaino looked away. There were some more things he could say about himself, but he was not sure the man would approve of them. “I ... there’s not much more I can say. Maybe ... maybe you have some questions?”

[goldentailor]

thegreatstrongbow​:

“Of course, I understand. These lands are not safe, not like Valinor. But I knew your grandfather at Cuivevenen; his kin will always be welcome in my company.”

Beleg placed the water beside Vaino, and then sat down himself, on the low cot that served as his bed.

“I apologise that my second mistook you for a woman. He ought to be more careful.”

“He always spoke fondly of his time here,” Vaino said. “And his thoughts often wandered to those he left behind. I ... I am glad to have met a friend of his.”

He looked at the stranger as he sat beside him and felt a faint blush creep up on his cheeks. He was ... quite good-looking.

“Do not apologize for that, please,” he then added as he shyly looked away. “I ... I really do not mind.”

[dominimalitiae]

[ Hiya! Sorry for disappearing these past few days. My brother’s got me into a new anime and I’ve been hooked and binge-watching all the episodes lol.

I also am kinda struggling with writer’s block, considering I have a fanfic I’m trying to continue. I’ll try to do some replies in these days!]

[goldentailor]

"I told you, I am you, deep in the mirror," The voice started to laugh and slowly faded away.

That laugh chilled Vaino to his core. Even long after he was left alone in silence, he stood in the middle of his room, pale and trembling.

Was he truly capable of such dark thoughts? He did not want to hurt anybody! All he desired was to be loved and accepted as he was ...

But what if the voice spoke the truth?

[goldentailor]

"Clearly madness has set in from you denying yourself for so very long."

"I-I am not mad!"

But he was hearing voices, wasn't he? A voice that so clearly wasn't the one of his own thoughts.

He suddenly stood up from his chair and franctically looked around his room, hoping to find the owner of the voice.

"Show y-yourself!"

[goldentailor]

"oh... I am merely the thoughts in your head, the true you, you wish to release."

He shook his head. He knew the voice of his own thoughts and he knew his heart. This voice ... it could not belong to him.

"That cannot be! I can hear you clearly ... j-just as if you were here with me ..."