Whatever I Fixate on

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Thinking about Coltlandgentry and their dad’s whole “being a man” thing.

How Cort doesn’t show much emotions, which could be attributed to Sierra training, but I also think it started with his father. Cort learned to hide his tears, his fear, even his happiness from his father. And I imagine it got to the point where even showing his emotions around the twins was difficult.

But the Twins both still show emotions.

Colt cries freely to Taylor swift, shows his fear and anger when he gets kidnapped. He shows his emotions.

And Ryland cries freely at just about everything because he can. He doesn’t care to hide his fear at any point.

And I imagine that is partly because of Cort. Who protected them from their father and told them that it was okay to cry, to show fear, to be happy despite what their father said. They may only have been able to show their feelings to Cort, but he made damn sure they knew their father was wrong about “being a man.”

Imagine Cort seeing the twins again when they’re all grown up. And seeing that they both can show their love freely, especially after therapy, in ways Cort never got to do.

Or alternatively: Cort seeing Colt again after Ryland got sent to space and seeing Colt cry and learning that Ryland never hid it either.

Cort being proud of his brothers for being able to heal from their childhood, even if he wasn’t able to. (Cort doesn’t see that he’s opened up around Claire, but the twins can. They’re proud of him too)

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

So tempted to write out the snippet of Cort going to live with his brothers with their uncle because it keeps running around my head and won't leave

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Shoutout to Project Hail Mary for:

Making me pick up physical books for the first time in a year (both the PHM book and The Gray man series cause I’m obsessed with Coltlandgentry)

Read two to three times as much fanfic as I usually do

And be on this hell site consistently, and post consistently-ish, for over a month now.

If anyone needs me, ima be refreshing my tabs again and probably continue thinking about the not canon brothers and their lives.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Do we ever think about the twins swapping places?

Like, on a day where their dad is out of the house with the potentially of him not coming back for a couple days, and the twins decide to try and swap places. Except Cort has always been able to tell them apart. They’re his brothers, he’s practically raised them from birth, if anyone can tell them apart it’s him. The twins are a little disappointed that their trick didn’t work, but they continue to swap places at school and that was fun.

Flash forward and the twins are living with their uncle now, have been for a year. They try the twin swap again. This time it works. March can’t tell the twins apart. Well, he can, but not when they’re swapped. And it fun! They get to trick their uncle and drive him crazy. Until it hits them that the only person that could tell them apart no matter what wasn’t there. Couldn’t be there. Would never be there because he was gone. And they end up grieving the fact that their older brother was unfairly locked away from them all over again.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Happy pride to everyone including the Coltlandgentry brothers

We’ve got:

Colt Seavers, disaster bisexual

Ryland Grace: Somewhere on the Aroace scale (personal headcanon that’s he’s completely aroace, no romance or sex)

And Cortland Gentry: Who doesn’t know what he is, cause he’s too busy trying to not die to figure it out. (I think he’s somewhere on the aroace scale, but not as extreme as Ryland)

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

AU where Cort doesn’t end up going to prison and instead gets sent with the twins to their uncle’s house and has to adjust to having semi competent adults around whose first instinct isn’t to beat their kids.

Additional headcanon, Uncle Holland looks a lot alike to his brother, who is Coltlandgentry’s father :)

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

The Ryan Gosling universe is either the funniest concept to grace this earth or the worst prison we've ever created.

Cause what do you mean there's this huge ass family who all look exactly alike because those genes are strong and they all have their own side adventures going on but they still check in on each other when they can because family is family.

But also, don't look too closely as any of their past and histories because there's trauma under literally every stone. And also, they will lose some of their identical family members because their side adventure got too dangerous and now the rest of them have to grieve their brother/cousin/clone(?)/however they're related because there was no way to change the outcome.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

In addition, with the wide range Gosling has in his movies, the side adventures for the family is also hilarious.

Half the family have adventures are the equivalent of being dropped in the middle of a jungle and told to survive while being hunted.

The other half is the equivalent of frolicking in a field of flowers on a sunny day.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

The Ryan Gosling universe is either the funniest concept to grace this earth or the worst prison we've ever created.

Cause what do you mean there's this huge ass family who all look exactly alike because those genes are strong and they all have their own side adventures going on but they still check in on each other when they can because family is family.

But also, don't look too closely as any of their past and histories because there's trauma under literally every stone. And also, they will lose some of their identical family members because their side adventure got too dangerous and now the rest of them have to grieve their brother/cousin/clone(?)/however they're related because there was no way to change the outcome.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

The wild dog imagery the Coltlandgentry AU has is killing me.

Cortland being a wolf, a creature known for living in packs and working together within that pack to survive, yet he falls into the media trope of lone wolf. Set out alone because that’s all he’s known since losing his brothers.

Colt being a coyote, a creature known often as a trickster in lore but also for its adaptability and cleverness. Colt tricking audiences into believing characters are real and doing these stunts, but also adapting (however badly) to the challenges from his work and staying alive through everything,

And Ryland, the fox. The fox too clever for his own good. Chased out of nearly every place that accepted him and being hunted down by dogs in order to die. The hunted fox running from danger and unable to escape the fate forced upon him because he was intelligent.

Just the three wild dogs doing the best they can with the fates given.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Cortland Gentry and his need to protect people lives rent free in my mind.

Cort, who spent his childhood protecting his brothers (brother in canon), living in the shadows because of his sacrifice to keep his family safe and happy. Who probably doesn’t go a day without thinking about his brothers and how they’re doing. Every now and then looking them up to see how they’re doing.

Sierra Six, who believed for the longest time that he was never going to get a family beyond the close relationship with Fitz, taking in Claire and deciding to give her the best life he can. Letting her live as normal of a life as possible while having to move around on the run. Who probably can see traits of his brothers in her with her attitude and determination.

Cortland Gentry, who has found someone to protect again, making up for leaving his brothers all those years again. Who finally gets the stone up the mountain.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Stratt loading up the Coltlandgentry brothers onto the ship: Hail Mary full of Grace

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Whoever, or whatever, gave Coltlandgentry writers access to Zombie Aus, count your days… and give me more.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Imagine this:

After Cort goes to prison, the twins get sent to live with their uncle, and investigator who lives out in California with his daughter and his “friend” and have to adjust to the differences.

They refuse to be separated, even when they’re sent a nearby school. But the first night they get there, Holland and Jackson have two spare rooms set up for the boys. Colt slips out of his room and into Ryland’s the second he heard his uncles go to bed. The two of them curl up in Ryland’s bed, pretending that their older brother is still there to hold them as they sleep.

Holland and Jackson are quick to move Colt’s bed into Ryland’s room once they realize that the twins ended up sleeping in the same room more often than not.

Holly is older than Cort, she’s off at college, but she’s told everything over phone and keeps in contact with her father to check on her cousins any chance she gets.

Both Holland and Jackson end up cutting back on the smoking, and drinking, because the twins watch them closely when they do. Ryland with fear and Colt with a deep wariness. Looks that should never be on a ten year old’s face.

They end up making sure to never smoke or drink around the twins, either doing it outside or making sure to keep it to one glass. But never where the twins could see it.

School goes about as well as it can, being new kids. The twins stick together, Colt is the one who introduces them to their new class, they got sent home one day because they both got into a fight protecting each other when some kids refused to stop bringing up Cort, their murder brother.

Holland called the school while Jackson got Colt some ice for the bruises and a band aid for a cut Ryland got. It didn’t stop the kids from bullying the twins, but Cort wasn’t brought up again. And the twins looked a little less cautious after the incident.

Ryland breaks a glass one time, an accident really, and Colt steps in front of his twin to protect him. Both stand frozen when Jackson starts to clean the glass up while Holland panic asks the twins if either were hurt.

The first time one of the twins fell asleep out on the couch or just anywhere within Holland or Jackson’s presence, they made sure to do absolutely nothing that could disturb them. Holland later cried because that meant the boys were starting to feel safe and to trust them.

Ryland and Colt slowly stop walking on eggshells around Holland and Jackson. They slowly stop trying to quiet any sound they make, or hide whenever they got home late while working a case.

They slowly start to trust.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Water must be a very interesting element for the Coltlandgentry brothers.

Don't imagine Cort's Sierra training making him practice handling waterboarding (no one can tell me that learning to handle shit like torture wasn't a training lesson) and him having to focus, not only on not giving in, also on not remembering the times his father almost killed him and his little brothers using the same method.

Or Colt doing the water stunts enough times to be able to do it with his hands behind his back while fighting off the fear of being under the water too long. Or that some days he still ends up hiding in his trailer to calm from a panic attack with a towel wiping his face to clear any water from it.

Or Ryland, who loves the beach and the fog, but can't stand being under the water. Who spends at least twenty minutes to work up the courage to get into the water but never letting his head fall beneath it because it'll drag up memories he's long since tried to forget.

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

Continuation from this post

Cort wakes up first, he got put into the coma first to keep any chance of him fighting back to a minimum. He's also the quickest to realize what happened too, due to his Sierra training and missions.

Colt and Ryland wake up pretty much at the same time, with Ryland waking about three minutes before Colt. (I think Ryland's the younger twin, so some irony or something to him waking first)

Ryland is obviously freaking out, he's got no memories, doesn't even know his name. But there's two people here, they both look so similar to him and they're both so familiar that it hurts his head.

Colt is the one who calms him down. Cort tries, but Ryland and Colt were closer on earth than Cort was to them.

They spend a few hours, maybe even days since they're kinda stuck up there, talking about the problem, Ryland's memories, the mission, and what's probably least important, Cort's whole "dead not dead" thing. They never discussed it on Earth, but now they've got time.

Ryland doesn't really know how to feel about it, he doesn't remember Cort leaving him, hell he barely remembers that they're brothers. Due to repressing childhood memories and the amnesia drug.

Colt and Cort argue about it when Ryland's asleep Though it's less arguing and more Colt making Cort explain the Sierra program and why he didn't me tell them he was alive. (He understands, it hurts, but he understands)

Then Tau Ceti. And Rocky. (I haven't actually seen PHM, but I'm reading the book so most knowledge comes from there)

Colt is the pilot. Since he was the risk specialist, he was the one testing a lot of equipment, including, I imagine, a version of the Hail Mary, he's familiar with the Captain's seat is what I'm saying. Cort is the co-pilot, though he's mostly just watching the monitors while Colt moves away from Rocky's ship.

When Rocky sends over the first canister, there's a brief argument about who goes to get it (Colt: I'm a stunt man, I can get it, Cort: A stunt man does not mean you're good for space travel! I'm older, I'll go get it. Ryland: I mean.. I could get it? Colt and Cort: No.)

Cort gets the canister while Colt watches as backup. Ryland does his whole idiot genius thing to figure out the canister.

Ryland refuses to be left on the ship when Rocky connects the two tunnels. First contact with aliens, of course he’s gonna go meet them! So all three end up in the tunnel to meet Rocky. Colt wasn’t going to be left on the ship either. Incase the alien tried to eat them or something.

Rocky is delighted to meet the brothers, going from being alone to having three people to watch him sleep, and they’re also here to solve the dying stars problem. Eridian equivalent of a dream come true!

Ryland and Colt are quick to get along with Rocky, Cort is a little more wary but even he slowly warms up to Rocky because it’s obvious they’re all in the same boat.

Rocky entering the ship is just as funny as it is in canon. With the bonus of three Goslings chasing after him. Cort is cautious about their new roommate. Rocky has decided all three need to be taken care of because “Leaky space blobs don’t know how to take care of themselves”

Yes I’m including the alien mandated bedtime. Ryland especially has problems with this, he has science stuff he needs to do and now his brothers are teaming with his new best alien friend to force him to sleep.

The brothers take turns watching Rocky sleep.

During one "night" Cort and Rocky bond over keeping watch. Because Cort has always kept watch over the twins even when they didn't know he was alive, and obviously keeping watch is important for Eridians. Both were signs of love and protection.

Rocky comments on the brother’s similar looks. It isn’t until they’re able to see a movie that Rocky believes them when they say that not all humans look like them. (He’s seen three of them! That’s like seeing three identical Eridians, there are assumptions that will be made!)

Rocky and Colt get along fantastically, teasing Ryland and Cort.

Ryland does eventually remember Cort leaving him and Colt, and he too has his discussion about why. Like Colt, he understands but is still hurt. The conversation ends with Ryland hugging Cort and sobbing. (Rocky worries about Ryland leaking, but he’s also getting used to Ryland crying. Just some light teasing.)

Colt does the fishing, Cort is piloting. This was a five minute argument. Ryland and Rocky watched like it was a tennis match before Rocky commented on the stupidity of arguing who is going fishing.

Like in canon, there’s the brief moment where everyone thinks they’re going home and then the toumeaba eat through the xeonite.

I think they’d still turn back to save Rocky. None of them want to leave Rocky to die, even if it means never seeing Earth again. Colt sends a message to Jody in one of the Beetles. With express instructions that only Jody is allowed to see it.

It kinda ends like the canon does. Ryland teaches, Colt helps with the physics even if he can’t do all the stunts he used to, and the pebbles love Cort. Theres one time the pebbles are taken on a field trip into the bio dome, Cort has at least three pebbles clinging to him at all times. Much to the amusement of the twins. Cort had no idea what to do with them, so he ends up carrying them around and lifting them to see the different views. (Obviously the smaller pebbles, that aren’t quite grown fully)

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

So I brought up the idea of throwing all three brothers into space and here’s how I’m thinking it happens.

So obviously, Ryland gets recruited to the Hail Mary Project. Well, Colt gets brought onto as a risk specialist. This doesn’t happen until after Stratt realizes that Ryland has the coma gene, and you know the whole identical twin thing. Gotta have back ups. As the project continues to gain attention, it’s obviously gonna get some negative attention. Because one thing humans are good at, it’s disagreeing on things, even if it means saving the world. So Sierra Six gets sent in as a bodyguard for Ryland.

Ryland and Colt are definitely hurt and angry because they hadn’t seen their big brother since he killed their father and they had been told he was dead. There was one fic I read with Cort as Ryland’s bodyguard where Ryland was pissed at Cort (rightfully so) and I am thus incorporating that into this little headcanon au. Just with the added Coltland twins angst. I don’t think it’d take long for the twins to, maybe not forgive, but to let things rest. Because there’s a planet to save and their little family is together for the first time in decades, so there’s more important things to go on.

A lot of things stay mostly the same, just with added Coltland gentry brotherly shenanigans. Like Cort getting Ryland to sleep, or Colt playing some moderate pranks, enough to be funny but not enough to impede the important work going on.

And then the explosion, both the main and backup scientists are dead. And while it’d kinda make no sense, and it kinda pains me to kill more people off, I’d say pretty much both main and backup crew might have to be dead. Cause there’s only three crew members, and conveniently three Goslings. But the brothers get told they have to go up into space. There’s no choice, well there’s the three hour decision period but we all know how that ends.

Obviously, Ryland doesn’t want to go, Colt has Jody, and while Cort’s concerns are his brothers (This would either take place before Gray Man, or Fitz lived and Claire lives with him still, love her and Cort, but he’s getting shipped to space here). So they’re gonna do the escape attempt.

Cort’s got his gun, and training, so he provides cover for the twins to get away. Someone gets a (really) lucky shot, he goes down and the twins are pretty close to follow.

Ryland is still the only one to get the whole amnesia thing (much to the anger of Colt and Cort) cause angst. Can’t have a Coltland gentry au without the angst.

Does this make sense, nope, but I really want to read about all three in space. I don’t have the time to write it myself. Might do a second part with headcanons/plot points with them and Rocky, maybe.

Edit: second part here

[gooses-ever-changing-fixation]

We've seen Ryland in space

I've seen Colt and Ryland in space

Now I really want to see Colt, Ryland, and Cort in space. I am well aware of how improbable that is. Sierra and all that. But please, I need Rocky and Cort to meet

This has the added bonus of Rocky meeting three humans and they're all Ryan Gosling. He's just gonna think Earth is just various Ryan Goslings.